Straight Friends

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2008 12:01 AM GMT
    how many of them know your lifestyle choice?I have alot of friends on another forum who have no idea and I wonder about how they would take it.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Nov 04, 2008 12:03 AM GMT
    I dunno all my friends like penises
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    Nov 04, 2008 12:07 AM GMT
    Your lucky.do you know of any gay cb radio/ham radio sites? Thats one of my other hobbies but all the sites I find are full of gay haters. I try and assimalate but it would be nice to find someone to speak to that was more "like" me.
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    Nov 04, 2008 12:14 AM GMT
    I am not out (that I know of, lol), to anyone prior to my life in Pittsburgh starting about 2 years ago. HS friends, college friends, my family, etc. I am the tipping point though, whatever emotion it is that has kept me closeted to this point is losing its edge. Life must go on. Prudence is critical, but for the most part, being out sets us free (right? I hope so anyway b/c it is the path I am about to take)
  • Delivis

    Posts: 2332

    Nov 04, 2008 12:20 AM GMT
    90% of my friends are straight and they are all fine with it. No one has ever been anything but fine with it, and i have never seen a problem with them being straight .
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Nov 04, 2008 12:25 AM GMT
    South Florida is like the Watts of Gaydom
  • Menergy_1

    Posts: 737

    Nov 04, 2008 12:29 AM GMT
    ^^^^^^^^^^icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif@GQ Jock
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:30 AM GMT
    Life style choice...how about accepting us naturally born as we are...anyway, I have a lot of straight friends and have no issues, ever, in hiding anything about my sexuality or even discusions on sexual acts. If they were so insecure as to be offended, scared, etc, they would not have become my friend in the first place.

    Are you speaking of your internet friends? Why would you care what they thought of you, they are just flashing dots on a screen. If they dont like it, tell them to go to hell and find new friends.

    As far as we know (as observed), the only life we have is this one, why spend it in fear of the ignorant, insecure masses and their possible judgement against you?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:33 AM GMT
    I love my straight friends. I want them to be open and honest with me and I expect that I can be open an honest with them. Otherwise we aren't friends, just drinking buddies.
  • Damn_You_zeke

    Posts: 35

    Nov 04, 2008 3:33 AM GMT
    All my friends know I'm gay... I have very few gay friends, and since I've come out ot all in my life, I've had no adverse reactions to it.

    I've been very lucky really.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:43 AM GMT
    msw1 said

    Are you speaking of your internet friends? Why would you care what they thought of you, they are just flashing dots on a screen. If they dont like it, tell them to go to hell and find new friends.



    Haha, so true.

    You don't even know if they are legit.

    Could be some sicko 'phobe.
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:54 AM GMT
    your name is mangina...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2008 4:56 AM GMT

    100% of my friends are straight (well, supposedly straight), 90% of my friends are immature, possibly homophobic, guys, and I'm not quite out. Only 2 of my friends, plus their acquaintances, know and they seem fine with it.

    I'm slowly coming out, but I'm just a little afraid of my friends' reactions. They'll either do two things:


    1. Hate me and never talk to me again.

    2. Or worse: tell me that they're not surprised lol.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2008 4:57 AM GMT
    dancerjack saidyour name is mangina...




    ROFL icon_lol.gif

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2008 5:23 AM GMT
    shyguy346 said
    dancerjack saidyour name is mangina...




    ROFL icon_lol.gif



    Seriously dude, what the fuck is up with that picture? Its scaring the hell out of me...lol.

    Every heard of Gooey Gus from Ghost Writer? Thats what it reminds me of.
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    Nov 04, 2008 5:41 AM GMT
    CitizenSol said
    shyguy346 said
    dancerjack saidyour name is mangina...




    ROFL icon_lol.gif



    Seriously dude, what the fuck is up with that picture? Its scaring the hell out of me...lol.

    Every heard of Gooey Gus from Ghost Writer? Thats what it reminds me of.



    Haha it was my Halloween costume. I was dressed as a Hugh Heffner Xenomorph. The red fedora hat was an added bonus.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2008 2:06 PM GMT
    I'm pretty much out online. In the other predominantly straight forums and in our dev team, they know I'm gay and they pretty much don't care. There is some good-natured ribbing but hey I can bitch back. LOL

    My age group are more open-minded it seems, in comparison to say, forums with a lot of older people where homophobia goes unchecked. Most homophobia I've seen from our generation is mostly just trolling or from obvious retards so I ignore them.

    In real life, my straight best friend knows I'm gay and is cool with it. Rest of my straight male friends don't, and I still have to cringe every time one of them makes a homophobic joke. :/ Though I think some of my female friends may suspect it, heh.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:16 PM GMT
    "Prudence is critical, but for the most part, being out sets us free (right? I hope so anyway b/c it is the path I am about to take)"

    When you come out to your friends you're telling them more than " I am gay" - you're telling them you think they are bright enough to deal with it; open-minded enough to let their opinion of you inform their general opinion of gay people, not the other way around; you care enough about them to be honest with them, and assume the feeling is mutual; you have the self-regard to be the FIRST one to accept who you are.

    Report back! I can tell you this: if your friends have no other gay friends, you will become their go-to guy for information about many things; if they do have other gay friends, you will be meeting them!
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:24 PM GMT

    BigBear, I have a whole lot of straight friends and always have (hey, a lot of people are straight!) This includes some of my very best friends, too, including my closest male friend at present.

    The fact is that we all support one another when we come out. We make it possible for our friends and loved ones to think of us when they think of gay issues, etc. Anna Quindlen called it "the power of one" - one person, out to one person, who henceforth can't say "I don't know anyone gay."

    But they can't say that or inform their opinion unless we are out to them.

    The first person I ever talked with about being gay wasn't one of the guys I had been with - it was a straight friend in college. I chose him because he was a very cool, open minded guy. I told him I had to talk to someone just to get it out of my head! And doing so calmed me down for a long time!

    There may be people who don't deal well with the news - at least at first. It's important to give people a little time, not expect immediate embracing of this news - after all, many of us don't embrace it right away, either.
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:33 PM GMT
    My straight friends are actually MORE alright with me being gay than my gay friends were when I came out to them.

    I never saw myself as fitting into the "stereotypical" gay box .... I'm not that effeminate, hate shopping, have never seen an episode of "Sex and the City" ... that was a big problem with me figuring out who the hell I was.

    Then I learned that you can be a man ... and still like men. Whew.

    Now my straight friends love it when I'm their wingman in the straight bars. No competition for them!
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:41 PM GMT
    I'm out to all my friends including all my straight friends, many of whom are southern-raised, military, stereotypical rednecks. Its never been an issue because I've never made it one. Being gay is part of who I am, but not all of who I am. And they respect the fact that I don't make it a priority. But with all that said, I also am cognizant of the fact that I don't "act gay", which has a large bearing on why they don't have an issue with it.
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:44 PM GMT
    most are straight and fine with it. it seems silly to surround yourself with all the same type of people. mix it up.

    besides, its rare that any of my gay friends want to stay "friends" then end up getting pissed off when i dont want to hook up with them. wtf
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:45 PM GMT
    jp930 saidBeing gay is part of who I am, but not all of who I am. And they respect the fact that I don't make it a priority.


    I think that's HUGE in this issue. I get quite annoyed when I'm introduced as "my gay friend." Nobody ever introduces me as "my dark haired friend" or "my short friend with huge calves" ... but those, too, are just how I was born.
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:48 PM GMT
    I have a good mix and I like it that way!
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    Nov 04, 2008 3:48 PM GMT
    GQjock saidSouth Florida is like the Watts of Gaydom


    This is certainly Gay Central, but not sure if Watts was ever as attractive as this area is. And many gays here are very affluent, prominent and influential. My own out gay attorney is presently running for Mayor of Fort Lauderdale, having formerly been a FtL City Commissioner.

    (Election not until March, 2009)
    http://www.deanformayor.com/

    Needless to say, all my straight friends here know I'm gay, but then it's difficult for them not to have some gay friends in South Florida. The local straights who have a problem with that can go barricade themselves in their mega-churches and try to pray away the gay.

    But I have had some online problems, which I sorta invited. Like going into the AOL chat room for Harley bikers with screen names like "Gay Motorcyclist" and "Gay Biker." An explosion of hate and threats would erupt the moment I appeared, and demands that I leave "their" room. One reason I haven't bought a Harley recently. LOL!

    I think BigBear will always encounter a few homophobes in any non-gay online forum. Hell, I've run into them in gay forums, too. But could they really be friends if they hate gays?