Is there an event that happened in your life that changed your life or perspective significantly?

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    Jun 28, 2013 1:26 PM GMT
    In a good way or a bad way?
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    Jun 28, 2013 1:28 PM GMT
    Joining realjock.
    I'm a different person for the better.
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    Jun 28, 2013 1:44 PM GMT
    Yeah, when my partner at work committed suicide at the age of 26. It affects me to this day, 17 years later.
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    Jun 28, 2013 2:10 PM GMT
    Blakes7 saidYeah, when my partner at work committed suicide at the age of 26. It affects me to this day, 17 years later.

    I've had two people I worked with in two different jobs comit suicide. It's certainly unsettling.
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    Jun 28, 2013 2:15 PM GMT

    1 Bill

    2 After being downsized out of a career, discovering I was capable of performing palliative care on a one to one basis for people wanting to stay at home rather than hospice.

    3 Getting stuff published

    4 Discovering when single that no memories of experiences with ex's should be able to control my future happiness or hopes, because that was akin to still going out with them, lol.

    ..and the bad..

    1 losing a close cousin to suicide
    2 losing a friend to suicide
    3 experiencing hate/harrassment over being gay to the point the authorities got involved.
    4 losing at Love - many times before Mr Bill.

    You know there's piles more both good and bad, but I figured this sufficiently snooze worthy. icon_lol.gif

    -Doug
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    Jun 28, 2013 2:24 PM GMT
    Is there an event that happened in your life that changed your life or perspective significantly?

    "In a good way or a bad way?"

    Quite a few events, among them:

    - 1968 motorcycle accident, w/severe head trauma resulting in permanently impaired mental functioning, memory loss, stutter, loss of musical ability (all not unlike the aftermath of a stroke), and facial disfiguration. The consequence of which I self-destructively enlisted in the US Army in a fit of depression.
    - Reading an e-mail than made me realize I'm gay.
    - Having my first husband die in my arms of AIDS.


    Only one of the above was good, in my view. The others changed me for the worse.
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    Jun 28, 2013 2:27 PM GMT
    .
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    Jun 29, 2013 11:32 AM GMT
    September 11, 2001
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    Jun 29, 2013 12:12 PM GMT
    Coming out two weeks agoicon_biggrin.gif
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    Jun 29, 2013 12:15 PM GMT
    tailgater_3 saidSeptember 11, 2001


    What is it with american's and that date?

    Get over it, please, no disrespect.

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    Jun 29, 2013 12:30 PM GMT
    For each US generation there is a defining moment. Most recently it was 9/11 (2001). Before that, perhaps, the Columbia shuttle disaster (1986), President Kennedy's assassination (1963), Pearl Harbor (1941), The Great Depression (1929), and etcetera. Most of us remember exactly what we were doing when these events occurred. Most of us take pause on the anniversary of these events. Most of us...remember.

    Those defining moments are watershed events in both personal and national identity. Please, do not tell me what event shapes/d my life. I get to decide that.
  • thatirishbast...

    Posts: 3523

    Jun 29, 2013 12:32 PM GMT
    IrishDarren said
    tailgater_3 saidSeptember 11, 2001


    What is it with american's and that date?

    Get over it, please, no disrespect.



    Thousands of families lost loved ones. An entire city was devastated. Millions joined the Armed Forces. Thousands of more men and women died in the resulting wars started by George Bush.
    It's only been twelve years. The repercussions are still heavily felt.
  • thatirishbast...

    Posts: 3523

    Jun 29, 2013 12:34 PM GMT
    1. Surviving the Omagh bombing.

    2. My best friend dying in my arms after being hit by a drunk driver.

    3. Being invited to join Riverdance.

    4. My father abandoning the family and my brother's resultant suicide.

    5. Realising I was an atheist.

    6. My sister's beating.

    7. The first time I fell in love.
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    Jun 29, 2013 12:37 PM GMT
    1. Becoming homeless during high school and being somewhat of a loner really toughened me up and showed me how capable I am if I pushed myself. I believe it also got me to pursue a career in private investigations since I valued the qualities they had.

    2. Experimenting with Japanese class in college made me really love the culture and in a sense helped me embrace a more lighthearted side of me
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    Jun 29, 2013 12:42 PM GMT
    IrishDarren said
    tailgater_3 saidSeptember 11, 2001


    What is it with american's and that date?

    Get over it, please, no disrespect.



    It's very disrespectful whether you meant it to be or not. It changed everything. Most of us will never be over it. I honestly can't believe you even had the nerve to post that.
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    Jun 29, 2013 1:02 PM GMT
    Well, my world view and politics have certainly changed a lot over the past two or three years, but it's hard to say if there is a defining moment that did it. Discovering videos of Noam Chomsky maybe. But there were a lot of things which led to that. Whether or not I was changed for the better depends on your own political views.

    And, of course, the moment that I finally realized I was gay. My family was on vacation in Hawaii over Christmas break. I forget why exactly it happened then, considering there had been enough signs before that. I'd even wondered before and dismissed the possibility (odd, since my family is not at all homophobic). But that time I took it seriously and thought, "So what if I am?" It certainly explained the gay porn I'd been watching icon_twisted.gif Anyway, I would definitely consider that to have changed me for the better.
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    Jun 29, 2013 1:17 PM GMT
    Reading "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance" by Robert Pershig and "On the Road" by Jack Kerouac did more than almost anything. Jesus, of course, and having a family member live with me while he slowly died from blood born cancer. It was a new world after he passed.
  • Apparition

    Posts: 3534

    Jun 29, 2013 1:26 PM GMT
    1. The day i ran off to do something and my mom thought i had died ( i was about 7, there was a smallest fish competition and i lost which was intolerable and i knew minnows which were smaller than the winner lived in the overflow creek to the artificial pond we were at, it began to pour rain. She eventually found me and was crying.) I never did anything like that again.

    2. Finding out i could win strip poker at will as a kid.

    3. Falling through the floor of my treehouse and avoiding serious injury that i shouldnt have.

    4. Realizing i was smarter than my parents.

    5. Finding out i picked the wrong major at university

    6. My coming out discussion with my roomate and subsequently going to glow at UW.

    7. Bruce leaving for japan

    8. Realizing that i am really not fond of people that arent freaks.

    9. Realizing there are different types of intelligence.


    9. My cousin dying in a car accident


    10. Finding out publicity is not a matter of money, but doing all the work for the reporters because they are in desparate need of filling pages/airtime
  • nomad4life

    Posts: 332

    Jun 29, 2013 1:49 PM GMT
    1. One of my best friends jumping off the George Washington Bridge. Made me realize how much more closely I need to pay attention to people, spot any signs suicidal signs, don't ever let this happen again.

    2. Getting hit by a car and spending the resulting months in a wheelchair followed by crutches. Got me into the mindset of life is too short. Also made realize don't underappreciate the small things in life (like walking, dancing, getting dressed by myself) because they could easily be taken away.

    3. Metting Abigail. Made me realize that sexuality is fluid, that one can like both women and men at the same time, and that I wasn't a freak for doing so.

    4. Dating Shannon, my emotionally abusive ex. Helped me figure out what I should be looking for in a relationship and what "love" really meant.

    5. Learning to act. Taught me how to control one's emotions and introduced me to the best friends in my entire life.
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    Jun 29, 2013 8:57 PM GMT
    pf0081 said
    IrishDarren said
    tailgater_3 saidSeptember 11, 2001


    What is it with american's and that date?

    Get over it, please, no disrespect.



    It's very disrespectful whether you meant it to be or not. It changed everything. Most of us will never be over it. I honestly can't believe you even had the nerve to post that.


    I said get over it! By no disrespect I mean't no disrespect to America's self harming the last twelve years that has done far more damage to America's population, society and reputation that the action of Al Qaeda itself.

    Had the nerve?

    George Bush RUINED your nation for generations and internationally did a lot of damage, and stained the beginning of the 21st century with a grim harsh apathy that still affects the tone of the world stage.

    Most countries of this world suffer bombings and bloodshed every day, and don't go all far right totalitarian like America did.

    The problem with America is you lot are letting it affect you, and let your corrupt government use that grief to their advantage. It's like if you laugh at someone but they are the ones that choose to cry.

    American's need to toughen up, liberal up, and stoic it up.

    And I am not going to reply to this subject again because I don't want a war on here against my opinions.

    More people die of gun wounds and inadequate access to affordable healthcare in your country than have died from terrorist bombings.

  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jun 29, 2013 9:04 PM GMT
    Na ... there were many events ... it was a life long process

    ..... and this too shall pass
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    Jun 29, 2013 9:07 PM GMT
    1) in a good way: walking out of a fundy church environment and accepting I was gay . The best decision I ever made, albeit extremely painful .

    2) in a crushing way: going to an ex gay ministry and submitting to their psychological torture .

    Self acceptance is one of the most important things ever. I spent a lot of my 20s and early 30s trying to be someone else
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    Jun 29, 2013 9:12 PM GMT
    thatirishbastard said
    IrishDarren said
    tailgater_3 saidSeptember 11, 2001


    What is it with american's and that date?

    Get over it, please, no disrespect.



    Thousands of families lost loved ones. An entire city was devastated. Millions joined the Armed Forces. Thousands of more men and women died in the resulting wars started by George Bush.
    It's only been twelve years. The repercussions are still heavily felt.


    HOW DARE YOU tell someone to get over it?! Bereavement happens but it's made doubly hard when it's murder - like 9/11 was.

    There are some extremely insensitive Tossers on here.
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    Jun 29, 2013 9:13 PM GMT
    September 7 2011. My heart transplant.
  • thatirishbast...

    Posts: 3523

    Jun 29, 2013 9:22 PM GMT
    blactor said
    thatirishbastard said
    IrishDarren said
    tailgater_3 saidSeptember 11, 2001


    What is it with american's and that date?

    Get over it, please, no disrespect.



    Thousands of families lost loved ones. An entire city was devastated. Millions joined the Armed Forces. Thousands of more men and women died in the resulting wars started by George Bush.
    It's only been twelve years. The repercussions are still heavily felt.


    HOW DARE YOU tell someone to get over it?! Bereavement happens but it's made doubly hard when it's murder - like 9/11 was.

    There are some extremely insensitive Tossers on here.


    So...um, why are you quoting my and yelling at me when I did not say that?