Vague Words

  • Joeyphx444

    Posts: 2382

    Jul 02, 2013 7:42 AM GMT
    There are some words people say that make me feel a certain way. Their meanings are usually easier to decipher when they are spoken cuz someone will have a tone with them but in an email or a text it's hard to tell.

    "Sure"-I always get the feeling that when a guy says this it's basically like a "whatever" or just a way of being nice even though they don't truly mean it and aren't all that enthused by something. Like when I ask if a guy wants to meet or go on a date and he says sure, it's kinda like, wow you seem so excited. I guess I just expect more than just some mediocre response to show interest

    "Fine"-Usually a response to "how are you?" or to a declaration of action, like "I am gonna go to....." or it can be equivalent to sure sometimes. It's just such a flat response that generally goes with sarcasm in my mind. I always have that connotation with it just like with "sure"

    "Maybe" or "perhaps"-It's not a definite answer and usually means no and they aren't man enough to say it. It can ALSO be genuine and the person doesn't really know.

    All these would be easy to tell the true meaning if said in person but the problem is thru email and text here.

    Maybe people don't mean to be mean or come off uninterested and boring but maybe subconsciously they are. At least my mind doesn't really know how to interpret them and if so, it's usually bad
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    Jul 02, 2013 7:56 AM GMT
    That's nice.

  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4355

    Jul 02, 2013 2:48 PM GMT
    You have a self-confidence problem, buddy. Why do you always jump to the negative? Too defensive. No one wants to hurt you. Try being more positive. If you fake it for a while, you'll find you feel it. Good luck to you and DON'T get bitter.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16308

    Jul 02, 2013 2:52 PM GMT
    I tend to view life with "a glass half full" rather than "empty" approach, meaning, I'm an optimist.
    Ones "one word" response may mean one thing for one individual... and something else for another. I would say, don't jump to conclusions and have more evidence before reaching a judgement on a comment.
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    Jul 02, 2013 2:53 PM GMT
    What about "OK", or "I see" , or "hmmm"?
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11405

    Jul 02, 2013 2:56 PM GMT
    Depends on the punctuation


    some people don't know how to use punctuation to convey expression icon_mad.gif

    ... and smiley faces icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jul 02, 2013 3:01 PM GMT
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Jul 02, 2013 3:04 PM GMT
    Just becuz ppl can talk or txt, doesn't mean they can communicate.


    Or doesn't mean they communicate effectively. Most likely they don't care to and don't care to care to. Even a lack of response can send a message, see?
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    Jul 02, 2013 3:10 PM GMT
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    Jul 02, 2013 4:48 PM GMT
    As if
  • RunnerBen

    Posts: 302

    Jul 02, 2013 8:27 PM GMT
    Trust your instincts. I usually find that if a guy is interested, he'll find a way to let you know, whether or not it is with words.
  • Rhi_Bran

    Posts: 904

    Jul 02, 2013 9:42 PM GMT
    Just because you like beating off to your own lexicon doesn't mean other people are that way icon_biggrin.gif

    Some people are just more terse than others. I had to learn that too and to be frank I'm still learning it - I'm very wordy even when I think I'm being sparse. Some people think I'm too overbearing, so I just try to find people who like talking as much as I do.
  • heyom

    Posts: 389

    Jul 02, 2013 11:08 PM GMT
    I generally have the problem that I think people are uninterested when they speak thus in the Northern countries. In Latin american, Mediterranean and other more effusive countries I don't have that kind of miscommunication.
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    Jul 02, 2013 11:32 PM GMT
    I'm guilty of all of these (and quite frequently)

    I often say "fine" to "how are you" because it's the socially appropriate response. Usually when a person asks that, they are not expecting an actual answer, which would likely end up being TMI (unless the person is a friend).

    "Maybe" usually means "I'm leaning yes but I need to check for previous engagements before giving a definitive yes."

    It's hard to derive meaning behind words you read in an email/message/etc. I learned long ago not to jump to conclusions, because sometimes what I took for snarky was actually sincere (and vice versa).