Not replying back to a guy?

  • green_guy

    Posts: 40

    Jul 04, 2013 7:31 PM GMT
    Is it really that rude to not reply to a message a guy sent you wether it be on grindr, facebook, or texting. Or it better to say youre not interested. Even if you ve already had a convo with them, but youre just not feeling it. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Jul 04, 2013 7:38 PM GMT
    green_guy saidIs it really that rude to not reply to a message a guy sent you wether it be on grindr, facebook, or texting. Or it better to say youre not interested. Even if you ve already had a convo with them, but youre just not feeling it. icon_rolleyes.gif

    I mean if you've gotten to the point where you gave him your number, then yeah I think it's rude not to answer a text... even if your response is "don't text me"
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2013 7:58 PM GMT
    No one has to be interested in me but if I write a friendly message to
    someone on RJ and he doesn't bother to respond, I will see him as
    a mannerless prima donna and I won't try again.
  • Import

    Posts: 7193

    Jul 04, 2013 8:05 PM GMT
    obvs, u only reply back if the guy's hot, otherwise ignore them.
  • PR_GMR

    Posts: 3831

    Jul 04, 2013 8:38 PM GMT
    I don't reply when I'm not interested. Let them be upset. That's just the way life goes. I've many guys that don't respond to me either. I just grew a thicker skin.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2013 9:06 PM GMT
    Thick skin has nothing to do with it. Personally, I'm not *upset* if someone doesn't write back because I'm already corresponding with enough hotties.
    I'm just saying it's rude and makes a mockery of the whole "gay community" we make believe exists - to refuse to even acknowledge someone if you don't want to have sex with him.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2013 9:17 PM GMT
    thick skin my ass, manners are nice
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2013 9:31 PM GMT
    JohnSpotter saidNo one has to be interested in me but if I write a friendly message to
    someone on RJ and he doesn't bother to respond, I will see him as
    a mannerless prima donna and I won't try again.


    I agree with you on this - if someone takes the time to write you a message, it is courteous to at least acknowledge them, even if the message is very brief.

    Treat others how you want to be treated.
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    Jul 04, 2013 9:35 PM GMT
    dc0776 said
    JohnSpotter saidNo one has to be interested in me but if I write a friendly message to
    someone on RJ and he doesn't bother to respond, I will see him as
    a mannerless prima donna and I won't try again.


    I agree with you on this - if someone takes the time to write you a message, it is courteous to at least acknowledge them, even if the message is very brief.

    Treat others how you want to be treated.



    i say that all the time
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Jul 04, 2013 10:07 PM GMT
    On a side note, if you want to know if someone has you blocked, leave them a friendly photo comment. If it doesn't appear in your outgoing mail, then they have you blocked.
  • deep388

    Posts: 859

    Jul 04, 2013 10:39 PM GMT
    I think it's only good manners that you reply to someone's mail. Even if it can come off blunt with a resounding "I'm not interested thank you", it's much better than to not say anything back, it just makes the other person feel like you may have a superior complex or something and that you don't think they're worth the time of day to even get a response. I mean, you wouldn't just look away or not answer back to someone in real life if they said something to you would you?
  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Jul 04, 2013 10:59 PM GMT
    green_guy saidIs it really that rude to not reply to a message a guy sent you wether it be on grindr, facebook, or texting. Or it better to say youre not interested. Even if you ve already had a convo with them, but youre just not feeling it. icon_rolleyes.gif



    Normally, I'd say that you don't have to respond to any messages you receive.
    But, in this case, since you already had a conversation with him, I think it would be best to tell him how you feel, rather than just stopping communication with him, and having him wonder what happened.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jul 04, 2013 11:31 PM GMT
    It depends what the message is that he sent you.
  • PR_GMR

    Posts: 3831

    Jul 04, 2013 11:33 PM GMT
    HottJoe saidOn a side note, if you want to know if someone has you blocked, leave them a friendly photo comment. If it doesn't appear in your outgoing mail, then they have you blocked.


    Good to know, Joe.

    And.. I'll say it again. Grow a thicker skin. It has nothing to do with manners. When someone is not interested in chatting with you, they don't owe you a damn thing. You gotta grow up and accept that.
  • PR_GMR

    Posts: 3831

    Jul 04, 2013 11:39 PM GMT
    (/facepalm)
  • BloodFlame

    Posts: 1768

    Jul 04, 2013 11:46 PM GMT
    Speaking for myself, if I do write a message to a guy and he doesn't respond, while it does suck, I try not to dwell on it too much. But I will agree with JohnSpotter, my view on them will change and make me less interested. And I know it may sound mean but this has happened to me where I did message someone and they didn't respond, then a month or two later, they tried messaging me and I in turn ignore them. I know it's rude but I don't have time to deal with such actions like that. It's like the whole "well I know what you are like, so I'm not going to respond" type thing.

    Whenever a guy messages me and I'm not interested in them, I kindly turn them down. The only time I won't respond at all is if they send an inappropriate picture or message.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2013 11:51 PM GMT
    I don't think about it when someone loses interest in me or never responds to a message we may have had in a convo. To be frank and direct i simply say in the back of my mind "Fuck em. It doesn't matter to me."


    Now as for me dealing with messages, I respond to each message i receive here and when i feel like i am losing interest with someone i kindly tell them no.


    I just don't respond to desperation messages like viewing of private photos without getting to know me first and etc.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 05, 2013 12:51 AM GMT
    PR_GMR said(/facepalm)

    What does that mean, please?
    In html or Net-speak, that means you've removed a facepalm so I'm curious.
  • PR_GMR

    Posts: 3831

    Jul 05, 2013 1:01 AM GMT
    JohnSpotter said
    PR_GMR said(/facepalm)

    Whay does that mean, please?
    In html or Net-speak, that means you've removed a facepalm so I'm curious.


    It means that the lack of common sense in this thread is making me do a facepalm. Replying back to someone you're not interest in only leads the other person on that some sort of physical connection will occur. It is best not to reply back. They get the message sooner and can move on.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 05, 2013 2:05 AM GMT
    So you're saying we should only talk to people we want to have sex with.
    That gay people have nothing else to offer.
  • ytOwen

    Posts: 298

    Jul 05, 2013 2:45 AM GMT
    green_guy saidIs it really that rude to not reply to a message a guy sent you wether it be on grindr, facebook, or texting. Or it better to say youre not interested. Even if you ve already had a convo with them, but youre just not feeling it. icon_rolleyes.gif


    Manhunt has an excellent auto reply:
    Thank you, but I'm not interested.

    It's polite, but direct.
  • ytOwen

    Posts: 298

    Jul 05, 2013 2:47 AM GMT
    To continue for a sec ... ... ... you never know where the other person might be at. Offering a polite and clear message is good for everyone involved.
  • killercliche

    Posts: 948

    Jul 05, 2013 5:06 AM GMT
    It is polite to answer reasonable messages for sure, but I would understand someone not writing back the "hey" spammers.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 05, 2013 5:24 AM GMT
    CopperDevil saidthick skin my ass, manners are nice

    This!

    I know my limitations, and in this "community" they're seen by many as glaring. But I own my years. And since nature intended for me to shed hair upstairs I own that reality too. If somebody can't see past that, let alone read the profile I took the time to write, it's no skin off my nose. But less than ten seconds' worth of common courtesy doesn't kill. "Thanks for the pic comment," or "I appreciate your hot-listing me," and you're done. WTF is so inconvenient or complicated about that?

    As for the significant majority of Gay guys, who are so offended by someone who doesn't fall within their strict age criteria or who isn't sufficiently "a-TRACK-tive" to give the time of day? They're forgotten "just like that." I've been out of middle school way too long to waste my time worrying about people stuck at that level of maturity.
  • Rene_Aensland

    Posts: 2495

    Jul 05, 2013 9:21 AM GMT
    MuslNorganLikr said
    CopperDevil saidthick skin my ass, manners are nice

    "Thanks for the pic comment," or "I appreciate your hot-listing me," and you're done. WTF is so inconvenient or complicated about that?



    +1.

    I do this. =]