Repetitive Depressing Thoughts

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    Jul 07, 2013 4:02 AM GMT
    I've been having thoughts that have been plaguing me for the past couple of months. They're very depressing and deal with family, society, and past memories. My faith and hope has kept me from going into absolute depression, but sometimes I find myself crying. I'm at an age where I really just want to be out there having a good time, meeting new people, and simply living; but I'm also at an age where I just graduated and I have to seriously make decisions of what direction I want to go with my life.
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    Jul 07, 2013 4:13 AM GMT
    I know exactly how you feel. Hopefully after accomplishing what you need to do you'll have time to do what you want to do.
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    Jul 07, 2013 4:40 AM GMT
    From my own experience, I have found that I am able to feel "depressing" thoughts about life, family, society, the future/past, etc., AND simultaneously be feeling serene, grateful, upbeat about life, family, society, the future/past, etc.

    Yes, I know that sounds contradictory, but it is possible (at least from my own experience).

    For me, the key is knowing that thoughts and feelings can change from moment to moment and that whatever I'm thinking and feeling...it will pass.

    Also, if I do find myself "stuck" in a funk, I by sheer force of will "unstick" myself and get up, get out, and go do something "living". Even if I don't feel like it in the moment and even if my thoughts are telling me "why bother".

    I've also found that the gym (both cardio and weights) is a great way of transmogrifying negative feelings into positive strength. For example, anxiety seems to turn into stamina and "endorphine rush" when I do cardio. And, anger can turn to strength when I do weight training.

    Therapy with a psychologist helps as well. Especially if I feel that I want to talk things through with somebody who can guide and augment my own problem solving processes.
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    Jul 07, 2013 4:43 AM GMT
    francoshells saidI've been having thoughts that have been plaguing me for the past couple of months. They're very depressing and deal with family, society, and past memories. My faith and hope has kept me from going into absolute depression, but sometimes I find myself crying. I'm at an age where I really just want to be out there having a good time, meeting new people, and simply living; but I'm also at an age where I just graduated and I have to seriously make decisions of what direction I want to go with my life.


    This was suggested to me by a very wonderful psychologist friend:
    Thoughts and feelings are, at times, like people in an audience. There you are trying to do and be who you are and what you want to be, and those people in the audience keep jumping up and down and shouting, "Look at me, look at me!"

    So I suggest to choose who you are going to listen to; your desires and drive or thoughts and feelings about the past that you are leaving. Don't let the past control the future. icon_wink.gif
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    Jul 07, 2013 4:52 AM GMT
    Also, I suggest getting rid of your TV and not being a "news addict". Generally, I find "news" to be negative toned because that's the kind of stuff that is "sensational" and garners viewers.

    Also, consider your circle of friends. Are they upbeat, positive thinkers? Or, are then "Debbie Downer" whiners, complainers, cynics, and "parade pissers". Hang with the folks who have the winning attitudes.

    Family can be a lot tougher...especially if they are negative thinkers. Earlier in life, I had to put a little distance and set some boundaries with my family. Today, they appreciate when I'm there AND they respect my boundaries. Because they know that if they don't, I'm going to do one of my famous, "Well, well, well, look at the time. I think I'm going to go (insert fun activity here)". And I'm out of there for a few hours or for the rest of the day. Absence then makes their hearts grow fonder. At least in my own family's case.
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    Jul 07, 2013 1:36 PM GMT
    There's no need to fret about "society." Eliminate that one from your brain and focus on being depressed about the personal things.

    Then, realize that you don't have to think about something if you do not want to think about it.
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    Jul 07, 2013 5:21 PM GMT
    you are smart and beautiful, and while you may be at a point of making serious decisions, they shouldnt be harmful. focus on the things you love doing and that make you happy because those things will decide where you should go. let yourslef imagine what a life of happiness would be for you, and then go after it! the only person that can stop you is you, but you are also the one to make yourself go. And like Abby says, maybe its time to stop focusing on yourself and try an outreach of some kind. go help people that have it rough because it can(it wont if you resist it, obviously) help put your life into perspective and show you that you have everything you need, or perhaps what you are missing.

    It may also help to schedule a month or so to just do nothing serious. of course keep exercising, take care of yourself, but just give yourself a chance to taste some freedom and remember that the goal of whatever your decisions is to enable you to pursue your happiness. have faith that the decisions you make in earnest attempt to be happy will have whatever result they are supposed to. Best wishes, and if you are looking for a get-away, come to sunny New Mexico! We can go hiking and visit old folks homes icon_smile.gif
  • Splendidus_1

    Posts: 611

    Jul 07, 2013 5:42 PM GMT
    GAMRican saidAlso, if I do find myself "stuck" in a funk, I by sheer force of will "unstick" myself and get up, get out, and go do something "living". Even if I don't feel like it in the moment and even if my thoughts are telling me "why bother".

    I've also found that the gym (both cardio and weights) is a great way of transmogrifying negative feelings into positive strength.

    That's what I do as well, and it works for me! Give it a shot man, might work out for you too. Best of luck!
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    Jul 07, 2013 5:55 PM GMT
    GAMRican saidAlso, I suggest getting rid of your TV and not being a "news addict". Generally, I find "news" to be negative toned because that's the kind of stuff that is "sensational" and garners viewers.


    My cousin in Vancouver avoids the news for the same reason. At first I thought this ostrich-like approach was a bit odd, but I now think it has some merit.
  • fLiP21

    Posts: 48

    Jul 09, 2013 6:53 PM GMT
    GAMRican saidFrom my own experience, I have found that I am able to feel "depressing" thoughts about life, family, society, the future/past, etc., AND simultaneously be feeling serene, grateful, upbeat about life, family, society, the future/past, etc.

    Yes, I know that sounds contradictory, but it is possible (at least from my own experience).

    For me, the key is knowing that thoughts and feelings can change from moment to moment and that whatever I'm thinking and feeling...it will pass.

    Also, if I do find myself "stuck" in a funk, I by sheer force of will "unstick" myself and get up, get out, and go do something "living". Even if I don't feel like it in the moment and even if my thoughts are telling me "why bother".

    I've also found that the gym (both cardio and weights) is a great way of transmogrifying negative feelings into positive strength. For example, anxiety seems to turn into stamina and "endorphine rush" when I do cardio. And, anger can turn to strength when I do weight training.

    Therapy with a psychologist helps as well. Especially if I feel that I want to talk things through with somebody who can guide and augment my own problem solving processes.


    You're not the only one who has this contradictory feeling. When I've been down, I can still think logically. For example even though I may be depressed about a break up, I know that it is probably for the better and try to look at the best of what I do have. In regards to the OP, my mother always taught me that I should be happy because I can see, I can hear, I can talk, these little things that we always take granted every day.Learn to appreciate the small things. When you're crying, just look at the sky and be grateful that you are able to see such a magnificent view because some people really can't.When I'm stressed over something that has to be accomplished such as passing an exam, getting into a school, getting a job, etc., I always write it down if it is accomplished. Try it, it does help. It's like a list of why I should be happy. Mine for example says, -finally got my driver's license, - paid off my credit card,- got my A.A degree. When I'm just pessimistic I look at it and remember all the good things that have happened to me. Oh , the exercise thing does wonders too. If you're not an avid runner like me, walking does the same thing if you're feeling down.
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    Jul 09, 2013 7:03 PM GMT
    francoshells saidI've been having thoughts that have been plaguing me for the past couple of months. They're very depressing and deal with family, society, and past memories. My faith and hope has kept me from going into absolute depression, but sometimes I find myself crying. I'm at an age where I really just want to be out there having a good time, meeting new people, and simply living; but I'm also at an age where I just graduated and I have to seriously make decisions of what direction I want to go with my life.


    I figure its a chemical imbalance. I knew 3 guys that killed themselves when they hit male menopause and it was happening to me. I figure it was like the crazy hormonal swings guys have when they are in their twenties.Vinyasa yoga and Paleo diet stabilized and fixed everything for me. What a huge relief .
  • MarvelBoy23

    Posts: 279

    Jul 09, 2013 7:09 PM GMT
    Alpha13 said
    francoshells saidI've been having thoughts that have been plaguing me for the past couple of months. They're very depressing and deal with family, society, and past memories. My faith and hope has kept me from going into absolute depression, but sometimes I find myself crying. I'm at an age where I really just want to be out there having a good time, meeting new people, and simply living; but I'm also at an age where I just graduated and I have to seriously make decisions of what direction I want to go with my life.


    I figure its a chemical imbalance. I knew 3 guys that killed themselves when they hit male menopause and it was happening to me. I figure it was like the crazy hormonal swings guys have when they are in their twenties.Vinyasa yoga and Paleo diet stabilized and fixed everything for me. What a huge relief .


    Paleo is really helping me as well mentally. I feel more clear than I have in a long time. I am doing DDP Yoga, but curiosity has ensnared me, what is Vinyasa Yoga?
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    Jul 09, 2013 7:16 PM GMT
    francoshells saidI'm also at an age where I just graduated and I have to seriously make decisions of what direction I want to go with my life.

    Sounds to me you may be stressed at the fact you are at a point where you need to make life decisions. You may want to consider taking some time off to de-stress.
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    Jul 10, 2013 1:55 AM GMT
    Depressing thoughts are inevitable just like happy moments.
    Our pain comes from accepting one and rejecting the other, try to welcome both, then you may find peace in both.

    It is difficult to achieve but it's not impossible.
    For many, it is difficult even to comprehend its true meaning, but it doesn't mean it's stupid.
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    Jul 12, 2013 1:11 AM GMT
    GAMRican saidAlso, I suggest getting rid of your TV

    +1,000,000

    Of course, I recommend this for everyone. There are so many things wrong with tv.
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    Jul 14, 2013 11:43 AM GMT
    Smoke more pot.
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    Jul 14, 2013 11:58 AM GMT
    WJohnP saidThere's no need to fret about "society." Eliminate that one from your brain and focus on being depressed about the personal things.

    Then, realize that you don't have to think about something if you do not want to think about it.


    ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
    icon_eek.gif
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    Jul 19, 2013 5:05 AM GMT
    Franco,

    I'm about to share with you one of the most empowering, life changing things you could ever learn. Are you ready for it? Get ready because it's like taking the trippy pill in the Matrix. Once you understand what I'm about to say, you won't be able to look at life or your emotions the same way again. Ok ok, enough chit chat, here it is!

    Every single emotion you've ever felt is caused by an association within the subconscious mind that expresses itself as a feeling based off past positive or negative experiences to that association. This occurs when a "trigger"(similar event or stimulus) resembling the association occurs and causes the same emotional response to the original association. And as those associations grow stronger within your mind they become habits of living to the point that a "trigger" is no longer needed for someone to feel that way.

    So if that sounds complicated let me put it to you this way.

    Why will a dog fill one person with love and positive fuzzy feelings, while to another it can cause them to experiences feelings of panic, paranoia, and imminent death?

    Why is it that when you give a relative a hug, it feels different than the euphoria that arises when you are embracing someone you are in love with, and yet for some receiving an embrace by someone they liked could make them feel unworthy...

    Why do two siblings grow up to like different foods even though they both ate the same things as a kid?

    The answer is because every individual has different associations to a stimulus!

    This is a big deal because it shows how every single person alive interprets the world subjectively(based on your individual perceptions), viewing things not as they truly are, but rather how their mind wants them to be. Yet if you ask them why they feel or prefer things a certain way they will give all sorts of different answers that to them sound completely logical(which are usually not based in reality at all), yet vary widely based on the person you are asking. Which brings me to emotions.

    Chronic feelings and emotions, overtime simply become habits which become endless cycles until a wrench is thrown in the works. These cycles or habits of emotions can be either a positive thing(in the case of feeling good and positive) or a negative thing(such as feelings of depression). There is a reason people who are generally happy stay generally happy, and people who are usually sad, usually remain sad. And that's because the depression you are feeling is nothing more than a habit. And as you continue to feed it by focusing on it and doing what it tells you, the more it will eat away at your soul. And the more your brain chemistry will reflect the emotional state your in.

    It is not chemically related at all! Your brain is totally capable of producing all the chemicals it needs to express any emotion in the universe. That's why pharmaceuticals work. They don't actually give you more serotonin, dopamine, etc.., but rather change how your brain reuptakes or releases those chemicals. That is why you could take some Ecstasy right now(don't do it!) and feel on top of the world.

    So how do you break the cycles of negative feelings? There are two ways. The first is to do the opposite of how you're feeling. So if you feel depressed and don't feel like leaving the house, go leave the house. If you can't focus, buckle down and focus on what you need to get done. If you feel lonely, go out and meet new people even if it's uncomfortable. Remember depression is a cycle, and until you break the habit of being depressed, it will only get worse as the more you feed into the feelings of not wanting to do anything, hopelessness, etc, the worse you're going to feel as the depression becomes more tightly ingrained as a habit, until you're simply depressed all the time, just lik a smoker who starts off with a cigerette with every meal can end up smoking two packs a day! So start by doing things that in the case of depression you don't feel like doing. Slowly but surely you will begin to feel better. Whatever brings you joy and makes you feel alive(even if it was in the past), go do it! However this takes awhile and there is a quicker way which brings me to my next point.

    The other way to fix this is by visiting a good hypnotherapist. Psychiatrists and psychologists are only capable of working with the conscious mind(unless they are hypnotherapists as well), which is useless because everything that makes the conscious mind what it is(thoughts, beliefs, actions, habits, etc...) stem from the associations held within the subconscious mind. Until the subconscious associations are changed(either through doing things you don't want to and slowly discovering more joy, or going directly into the subconscious and reshaping the associations), don't expect much improvement.

    A good hypnotherapist has many methods to bring joy back into your life. Regression, reshaping perceptions of an event, neutralizing any negative emotions and beliefs and instilling positive ones are all very easy to do while someone is in a state of hypnosis. In addition it is much quicker, effective, permanent and less costly than any other alternative. You could be permanently rid of these negative feelings in only 3-5 sessions!

    I wrote this because I know a lot of people are feeling the same way you do, and I know that hypnotherapy is the answer. If you are interested I can work with you. I have an office in Hillcrest. If you genuinely can't afford it, I will work with you for free. Hypnotherapy is my lifes passion because I've experienced it's effectiveness in my life as well as hundreds of other people who I've worked with. I hope you found this informative and always remember, you are master of your destiny and it's your right to feel joyous and happy every single moment of your life. All you have to do is choose to do so. I wish you the best.

    Jason