what a night... :/

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 6:00 AM GMT
    Long story short....

    So I chatted up with this guy on grindr. we hitted off. he was good looking he told me I was handsome. we met up at a starbucks... only problem I invited one of my friends to tag along (who's really good looking) and they flirted and ended up making out while we were at the bar and i was closing out my tab...


    what the fuck? this definitely hits my self esteem... i thought i was doing good..

    I'm pretty much back down to the negatives... I don't get it. I'm ready to move the fuck out of memphis and just this whole fucking scene.....

    can guys ever be into one guy at a time???

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 8:21 AM GMT
    Ditch your so called friend for a start.
  • Rene_Aensland

    Posts: 2495

    Jul 07, 2013 1:06 PM GMT
    Oh my God...
    I'm literally just like icon_eek.gif this right now.

    I agree with Ohno.
    Find another date too, next bitch.
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    Jul 07, 2013 1:39 PM GMT
    youngRJ1 saidLong story short....

    So I chatted up with this guy on grindr. we hitted off. he was good looking he told me I was handsome. we met up at a starbucks... only problem I invited one of my friends to tag along (who's really good looking) and they flirted and ended up making out while we were at the bar and i was closing out my tab...


    what the fuck? this definitely hits my self esteem... i thought i was doing good..

    I'm pretty much back down to the negatives... I don't get it. I'm ready to move the fuck out of memphis and just this whole fucking scene.....

    can guys ever be into one guy at a time???



    Why aren't you "with" your friend? Probably because you aren't into him,right but the grindr dude was. So just go on to the next dude. You are not gonna have chemistry with everyone you meet. Its probably a 1:8 hit to miss
    ratio. A friend invited me to be wing man a while back and the same thing happened, the dude focused attention on me but I was not interested.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 1:39 PM GMT
    It's common to bring a "wingman" along as backup. But more typically when cruising at clubs, not on a scheduled meet-up. In this case instead of a wingman the OP unknowingly brought a saboteur. Never do THAT again!

    But don't get discouraged, never throw in the towel because of a single bad experience. Gay dating is full of bad experiences, so you keep at it until you strike gold. Either that, or stay at home and play video games all night.

    One night I zeroed-in on this new guy at our club who really attracted me. I approached him, we spoke, we drank together, we were having a great time. Closing time approached, when my usual MO was to ask the guy if he wanted to leave with me.

    I turned away for a second, only to see him gone. I caught sight of him leaving with another guy out the door. I was crushed. I'd worked this guy all night, and some other guy swoops in at the last moment and snares him??? Where's the justice in THAT???

    Next night I'm back at the same club, and the guy I had wanted is also there again. This time I'm not making any mistakes, it's a full-court press. This guy isn't leaving my sight for a second, no poachers allowed.

    But I do hint at him I was ticked the night before, and he apologizes! He explained the other guy was just passing through town, had a hotel room for 1 night, he said the magic flattering words. But turned out to be awful in bed. Good!

    That second night I brought my prize home. The start of a monogamous relationship and best friendship that lasted for years, that I finally ended when he wouldn't marry me, or anyone. He's still single to this day, and we remain in touch. I cherish the wonderful times we had together, will never regret my decision to pursue him.

    Moral: never give up, never get discouraged. If a guy steals a man you wanted, steal him back. Or find another. But never quit. You only lose when you let yourself lose.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 1:46 PM GMT
    How can your friend be in better shape then you? Your in perfect shape. Why do you meet a guy off the internet when you already have a friend you can mess around with? It seems like your friend has the same interest in guys. LOL.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 2:17 PM GMT

    Yeesh, this takes me back. It happened no few times, either, as often at clubs or bars when I met someone usually at least a few people I knew would be around (they did not go there with me)and sometimes the guy I met would hit it off with one of them.
    Rats. (my inner Charlie Brown, lol) What a downer.

    So I told myself two things:

    1 If the guy I was meeting was happy to wander off with another I was better off without him. Whew!
    2 Hey, I'm a matchmaker. Good for them.

    Both the fellow that you met and the friend who went with you on your meet-up were being tacky.
  • Eli_jah

    Posts: 1391

    Jul 07, 2013 4:27 PM GMT
    ART_DECO saidIt's common to bring a "wingman" along as backup. But more typically when cruising at clubs, not on a scheduled meet-up. In this case instead of a wingman the OP unknowingly brought a saboteur. Never do THAT again!

    But don't get discouraged, never throw in the towel because of a single bad experience. Gay dating is full of bad experiences, so you keep at it until you strike gold. Either that, or stay at home and play video games all night.

    One night I zeroed-in on this new guy at our club who really attracted me. I approached him, we spoke, we drank together, we were having a great time. Closing time approached, when my usual MO was to ask the guy if he wanted to leave with me.

    I turned away for a second, only to see him gone. I caught sight of him leaving with another guy out the door. I was crushed. I'd worked this guy all night, and some other guy swoops in at the last moment and snares him??? Where's the justice in THAT???

    Next night I'm back at the same club, and the guy I had wanted is also there again. This time I'm not making any mistakes, it's a full-court press. This guy isn't leaving my sight for a second, no poachers allowed.

    But I do hint at him I was ticked the night before, and he apologizes! He explained the other guy was just passing through town, had a hotel room for 1 night, he said the magic flattering words. But turned out to be awful in bed. Good!

    That second night I brought my prize home. The start of a monogamous relationship and best friendship that lasted for years, that I finally ended when he wouldn't marry me, or anyone. He's still single to this day, and we remain in touch. I cherish the wonderful times we had together, will never regret my decision to pursue him.

    Moral: never give up, never get discouraged. If a guy steals a man you wanted, steal him back. Or find another. But never quit. You only lose when you let yourself lose.


    Post of the year. Thank you Art Deco.

    Now I am going to go get my man!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 4:28 PM GMT
    get uglier friends.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 4:35 PM GMT
    Dallasfan824 saidget uglier friends.

    +1
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 4:36 PM GMT
    Dallasfan824 saidget uglier friends.
    . Agreed icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 4:37 PM GMT
    That's why dating is such a mess these days. You plan something in the morning and in the evening, if you are lucky, you will hear back that your date has a flu or is not feeling well.
    Truth is he found someone better than you. Damn this competition.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 4:47 PM GMT
    Bharatiya saidThat's why dating is such a mess these days. You plan something in the morning and in the evening, if you are lucky, you will hear back that your date has a flu or is not feeling well.
    Truth is he found someone better than you. Damn this competition.


    This is why I fear dating icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 4:52 PM GMT
    Oh boy!

    don't feel upset, considered it as a lesson...
    and the moral of it is...stay away from this person whom you call him as friend! he brings more pain than joy which is not a quality of a true friend.

    about the date, don't worry...there's someone better person out there for you!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 4:56 PM GMT
    You complain "can't guys ever be into one guy at a time" when you are the one who brought another guy along on a date! That is just amazing! If a guy brought another along on a date with me I would figure that means he wasn't all that much into me and doesn't want to spend time alone with me. It is no wonder "your date" took more of an interest in someone else icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 5:10 PM GMT
    You invited a "friend" on a date? icon_eek.gif

    Lesson learned? icon_question.gif

    You might have at least salvaged a hot threeway out of the fiasco before dumping your "friend" and Mr. Grindr.
    icon_twisted.gif
  • bluerdeep

    Posts: 16

    Jul 07, 2013 5:24 PM GMT
    Lol this is exactly why I'm over dating. But yeah, kind of a strange decision to bring a friend. I mean, you were in a public place. icon_confused.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 5:39 PM GMT
    Damn, no decent friend would do that to another.
  • Kel_

    Posts: 1360

    Jul 07, 2013 5:43 PM GMT
    pf0081 saidHahaha you took a friend? That's just ridiculous. Why am I even replying to this? I dunno.


    First mistake: If it's a "date" don't bring anyone else. Unless its a double date.

    I don't see why you're bitching about it when clearly, you brought along a friend. For what purpose? I can't imagine being in a third wheel, but in this case, you were the third wheel.

    Yeah, better luck next time!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 6:13 PM GMT
    ART_DECO said....


    Thanks for the encouraging story. icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 6:14 PM GMT
    Well that was the thing, I wasn't established as a date...

    I thought bringing my friend would help me out.. the whole wingman thing... but yes i guess now i've learned myself..

    If it is a scheduled meet up at a coffee shop (etc.), come alone.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2013 6:21 PM GMT
    I may be out of the loop these days, but my impression is that bringing a third party along on a date is pretty much an invitation to a three-way...
  • Jessie_Lee

    Posts: 113

    Jul 07, 2013 6:31 PM GMT
    The mistake you made is bringing a friend along to a agreed meet-up. When you agree to meet-up with someone, it's technically suppose to be 1-on-1 unless otherwise discussed.

    This guy apparently hit it off better with your friend than with you. I mean, when you hit it off with 2 people around the same time, you gotta make a choice.

    Personally, I do not think Grindr is the best place to find a guy who's into one guy at a time.
  • toastvenom

    Posts: 1020

    Jul 07, 2013 6:48 PM GMT
    why did u bring ur "friend" along in the first place?
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    Jul 07, 2013 6:56 PM GMT
    Toastvenom saidwhy did u bring ur "friend" along in the first place?


    i guess i felt a little insecure... can't really give a reason