Do you really need to be balanced?

  • Joeyphx444

    Posts: 2382

    Jul 18, 2013 9:41 AM GMT
    I always see people's profiles state how they can go out clubbing and bar hopping but they also love to stay inside and watch movies or go hiking/anything outdoors. I always wondered, are there (there must be) people who do one or the other. I know there are people who have NO interest in really staying in or going outdoors and experiencing nature. They rather be out clubbing or in cafes in the city, etc. Then there are people who love outdoors and seeing nature and watching sunrises/sunsets and watching movies and cuddling by the fireplace on a Friday night.

    I know there are labels for each of these people but is it really bad to be one or the other. I consider myself leaning more toward being the chill/outdoors and hanging out type rather than out on the town/club/bar hopper. I don't think I am balanced. So I am labeled as boring and especially at my age in the gay community it's hard to find guys with those interests.
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    Jul 18, 2013 10:06 AM GMT
    I think the actual activity is irrelevant. I think what people are actually saying is what level of social interaction they prefer.

    I usually prefer hanging out with a small group of friends rather than a large group in a crowd. This lends itself to intimate dinners or country yomps rather than city bars.
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    Jul 18, 2013 11:38 AM GMT
    I think the usual young gay adults go through phases. It's like a rite of passage. It can be any age (for example if you only came out at 30, your phase will be then). The phase is going out / clubbing / hooking up is very normal and can vary on the number of years. After a while naturally we mature and pursue more intellectual/non-party based interests. I do feel that the majority of gays will go through this phase. Being 23 you may find that most other gays your age are going through that phase. You don't necessarily need to follow suit...

    I used to be the same, going out 2-3 times a week. Now I'm 26 and at home I will go out clubbing for a big night like only 2-3 times a year. But I'm content with that and your idea of fun and balance change over time. For me my fun is travel, going to festivals, hiking, outdoors, group catchups etc with the occasional bar night out

    I would try and make some genuine friendships with people who have similar interests, and don't limit yourself to just gay men. You will find that over the years the people you go out to bars with, won't be the guys who stick around 5-10 years down the track. If you don't feel like you need to go out then don't, but just make sure it's out of your system and you get to experience it whilst your young so you don't regret that.
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    Jul 18, 2013 2:03 PM GMT
    gayinterest said

    I usually prefer hanging out with a small group of friends rather than a large group in a crowd. This lends itself to intimate dinners or country yomps rather than city bars.


    I don't know what a yomp is, but otherwise that sounds like me. :-)
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    Jul 18, 2013 2:07 PM GMT
    showme said
    gayinterest said

    I usually prefer hanging out with a small group of friends rather than a large group in a crowd. This lends itself to intimate dinners or country yomps rather than city bars.


    I don't know what a yomp is, but otherwise that sounds like me. :-)


    lol - it's a leisurely stroll/trek through the countryside. :-)
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    Jul 18, 2013 3:10 PM GMT
    It's kind of hard to stay out all night partying AND be up with the sun to catch the surf (or whatever.) This may lead to speciation.

    Hint: When you tell a party boy "I'll pick you up in the morning," what he's actually thinking is "four o'clock in the afternoon."
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    Jul 18, 2013 3:23 PM GMT
    I'm not into heavy partying as I prefer the more intimate social setting between good friends and acquaintances.
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    Jul 18, 2013 10:18 PM GMT
    Balance is definitely overrated. Look what happened to the Jedi Knights who yearned for a return of balance to the Force. They all died.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jul 18, 2013 10:31 PM GMT
    They are all white lies with the specific purpose of sparking someone's interest. The truth is that they live an absolutely normal every day life just like you.
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    Jul 18, 2013 10:32 PM GMT
    I wouldn't say it's being balanced - it's being nothing. When I read a profile full of that, I typically assume they're really boring and dull people, or they haven't taken the time to get to know themselves.