Is it just me or are muscular guys/bodybuilers more intimidating?

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    Jul 20, 2013 2:26 PM GMT
    Does anyone else have shyness around muscular guys and people they are attracted to? I'd never approach a bodybuilder at a bar, and whenever one talks to me I get really anxious. It's kind of annoying because those are the types of guys I'm attracted to and I'm eventually going to have to get over my shyness if I want to be with one.
  • rnch

    Posts: 11525

    Jul 20, 2013 2:34 PM GMT
    It's been my experience that many pumped up guys are quite shy and "nice" once you get past their outward intimidating appearance and actually talk with them.


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    Jul 20, 2013 2:38 PM GMT
    That being said given the demands of the sport/hobby they tend to devote more energy and interest to likeminded people. They will be friendly but often only to a point.
  • great_scott

    Posts: 519

    Jul 20, 2013 2:38 PM GMT
    It's been my experience that many pumped up guys are big ole bottom queens once you get past their outward intimidating appearance and actually talk with them.

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    Jul 20, 2013 2:41 PM GMT
    No, the first gay club i ever went to when i was 19, the biggest bodybuilder guy couldnt take his eyes off me and everyone wanted him and they were all obvious about it. I never fawned over him the way the gay guys at the club did, and i always acted normal around him, and i think thats one of the reasons he liked me so much
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    Jul 20, 2013 2:42 PM GMT
    I jst started hanging out w/ a guy he's str8 not that that matters but he was a legitimate professional MMA fighter. He's a big guy lifts 350# boulders, has cauliflower ears and lks mean and extremely unfriendly. Get this guy to laugh or crack a smile and he lights up the entire office.
    We go to the gym and he wants to help everyone perfect their form. A geniune great guy but you'd never know unless you get him to talk.
  • ohioguy12

    Posts: 2024

    Jul 20, 2013 4:46 PM GMT
    I'm not really attracted to muscular guys/bodybuilders, but yes, I am a little intimidated and shy around guys who I'm attracted to. But alcohol helps.
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    Jul 20, 2013 4:55 PM GMT
    jr17 saidDoes anyone else have shyness around muscular guys and people they are attracted to? I'd never approach a bodybuilder at a bar, and whenever one talks to me I get really anxious. It's kind of annoying because those are the types of guys I'm attracted to and I'm eventually going to have to get over my shyness if I want to be with one.


    um, yeah. they are obviously bigger-framed than many of us, but they're people too icon_smile.gificon_smile.gif
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    Jul 20, 2013 5:09 PM GMT
    Their muscles and size doesn't scare me. It would be their personality that would because if they're psycho, they would use their strength to kill someone. icon_sad.gif
  • secondstartot...

    Posts: 1314

    Jul 20, 2013 5:09 PM GMT
    completely intimidated - Im not just "into" muscular guys its a fetish/obsession I have rooted deep in my sad and pathetic early childhood....I have been fortunate to have hooked up with guys like this...they have been amazing ....I hope to meet one oneday who is a) in the same country as me b) not a tourist c) not already involved or married ....one day
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    Jul 20, 2013 5:12 PM GMT
    I used to think they were intimidating, too. I think that's the stereotype. Once you get to know a few, you find the opposite to be true. Some of the nicest people I know.
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    Jul 20, 2013 5:19 PM GMT
    I've been with all types of guys, and the external stuff is the least of your worries. Be a little cautious of beautiful men in general, because there can, and I stress, *can* be an ugly narcissistic tendency. It's more than just thinking you look good, it's thinking you are doing someone a favor by being with them . . . nasty type of dude.
  • jackie8504

    Posts: 8

    Jul 20, 2013 5:25 PM GMT
    nothing to fear ive been hanging out at sports bars all my life and im petite/slim build but not fem.my point is there people just like you and me.and if u dont say hello they cant read your mind.
  • jackie8504

    Posts: 8

    Jul 20, 2013 5:27 PM GMT
    ohioguy12 saidI'm not really attracted to muscular guys/bodybuilders, but yes, I am a little intimidated and shy around guys who I'm attracted to. But alcohol helps.
    amen to that
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 20, 2013 5:42 PM GMT
    any muscular guy that ive talked to is actually pretty nice
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    Jul 20, 2013 5:59 PM GMT
    Off ice I won't approach muscular guys. On ice I'm not intimidated, if they have the puck there fair game for a check.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 20, 2013 6:02 PM GMT
    We're hard wired to be intimidated by folks bigger than us. Any shrink can tell you that. This isn't a hard question.

    Most guys that are well built are that way for a reason: discipline, patience, planning, work ethic, research, education, and so on. Things many folks would do well to aspire to. Most, and I've known many, go out of their way to be nice, but, just because we might rate a 8 to 10, or whatever, it does not give you the right to get into our personal space. Often times, those folks do well in whatever they decide to pursue, but, there's also the nut cases that don't have a career, or any semblance of a balanced life and are so very narcissist as to be a real drag.

    I've have to pop folks in the face for not respecting my personal space a few times, but, only after warning them numerous times.

    There's really no reason to be intimidated. Most folks from politicians, to movie stars, to big muscle heads, response pretty well to normal acting folks. Fastest way to turn of a well adjusted big buy? Adoration. If we're well adjusted, and most big guys are, we don't want, nor need, adoration. Uhh. Huge turn off.

    Manners, children....manners.

    And, you need to be realistic. While a big built guy might be just fine in being friendly, if you're old and fat, or young and starving, well...you need to accept that you might well not be his type. We tend to lean towards folks that we share a common experience with, whether, it's working out or the science club, or even false belief systems.
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    Jul 20, 2013 6:14 PM GMT
    Shyness is within most of us when want to get the attention of those who we like. Some guys might give you the impression to be unapproachable but I'm sure they are very nice guys and if you approach them and start a normal conversation, you'll find out they are very cool dudes and who knows, even more if the chemistry is right. Like everyone else has said, they are just people.
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    Jul 20, 2013 7:07 PM GMT
    Ever think they may be shy? I'm kind of a big guy and have been told many times I look intimidating, but I'm actually a bit shy. I'm a real friendly non-judgmental guy, though, and I'll talk to anyone, and more interested in what's in their brain than in their frame.
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    Jul 20, 2013 11:10 PM GMT
    jr17 saidDoes anyone else have shyness around muscular guys and people they are attracted to? I'd never approach a bodybuilder at a bar, and whenever one talks to me I get really anxious. It's kind of annoying because those are the types of guys I'm attracted to and I'm eventually going to have to get over my shyness if I want to be with one.


    That's b/c you're attracted to them. I workout at a strength gym. There are fighters, athletes, oly lifters, powerlifters, and a few bodybuilders. Almost everyone is kool-aide!

    Some bodybuilders and powerlifters are real *^&%@&!. But that has more to do with them being fucked up in the head icon_biggrin.gif At the end of the day, you want to talk to some one ... cruise right up ... say something (even if it's stupid). Life is too short to hold back!
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    Jul 20, 2013 11:11 PM GMT
    CopperDevil saidNo, the first gay club i ever went to when i was 19, the biggest bodybuilder guy couldnt take his eyes off me and everyone wanted him and they were all obvious about it. I never fawned over him the way the gay guys at the club did, and i always acted normal around him, and i think thats one of the reasons he liked me so much


    y am I not surprised!!! Copper, copper, copper ... SMH you devil you!!!!! icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jul 21, 2013 12:37 AM GMT
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  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 21, 2013 12:46 AM GMT
    It's been my experience that some are, and some aren't. Just like any other group of men.

    *shrugs*
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    Jul 21, 2013 2:22 AM GMT
    eagermuscle saidThat being said given the demands of the sport/hobby they tend to devote more energy and interest to likeminded people. They will be friendly but often only to a point.


    It's for this reason that I would hesitate to approach a muscle jock in real life, particularly in terms of dating. I would immediately think they were out of my league, given that they have spent a lot of time shaping their body into perfection, and I have not. If someone approached me I would go with it, but would likely be too intimidated to make the first move.
  • LeanFit

    Posts: 26

    Jul 21, 2013 2:30 AM GMT
    I am with you on this one! I always get intimidate by muscular guys, regardless of where I am. At work even I find it hard to talk to them just because I feel emasculated and judged. Especially when guys are in muscle shirts. I know this is stupid but its the way I have always been. I think the worst part is the fact that they know that I am looking at them when they are not looking at me because I am admiring there muscles.