"I don't think I am ready to show myself in the gym."
Hey, lots of people feel that way - some people don't want the cleaning woman to see their house a mess, so they clean before she comes ...
You'd be surprised how many people at the gym look like they have arrived for the first time. You might feel self-conscious at first, but don't worry. People stare at the eye candy, not the ones working to get to be eye candy! And there's always that day months away when someone who's seen you all along finally says, "You've really made some progress! You look great."
but don't take my word for it - stop by some gyms and take a tour - you get to keep your clothes on! And though it's easier to see everything during the slower hours (9-5 almost anywhere but NYC and LA
), it's useful to go by during the hours you would be actually using the gym, and see it at its busiest, if that's when you have to go.
Gyms have their own inside trainers who work privately for one-on-one, and you might find one of them to work with you at home. But like many personal contacts (doctor, for instance), the one someone else likes may not be a good fit for you.
There are trainers who will work on location in most cities, where there is a clientele that can afford them - best of luck.