How to tell if a guy is hitting on you

  • gjoseph

    Posts: 250

    Nov 11, 2008 3:19 AM GMT
    Hey y'all there's this guy that I REALLY & I mean REALLY feel attracted to his name is Hayden, and he plays football. It's kinda hard to explain this but he "spanks" me during akward times such as the (hallway, class) or whenever and actually hugs me. I always laugh when it happens I guess he knows that I like it IDK he is such a sweet guy he hasn't really been dating from what I understand I'm questioning him b/c he is so sexy with his muscles etc., and his personality (macho, etc.). Like how should I come on to him or should I at all? The last girl that I know he was with for sure was my friend Natalie but that was over with about 2 1/2 years ago. He is such an adorable guy ahh I just don't know what to do.

    Thanks =)
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    Nov 11, 2008 5:44 AM GMT
    I don't know if he is gay. A lot of straight men like to spank men icon_twisted.gif but then again so do gay men.

    First try to learn if he is "gay friendly", and if he is then try to approach him or better yet, make him approach you., that's what I do and it workedicon_razz.gif
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    Nov 11, 2008 7:32 AM GMT
    ugh gawd, I never know when a guy is coming onto me, I flirt with everyone and everyone generally flirts with me, straight mates included..

    You've no idea how often straight guys pat my backside or put there arm around me, hell they'll even kiss me and rough house and calling them a dork only makes it worse..

    I don't care what anyone says, a straight guy likes affection and to be close to another guy, it doesn't need to involve sex and it can be completely platonic..

    The best advice I can give you is, let happen what happens, if you are unsure, let him continue his affectionate behavior towards you, if he wants it to lead to something, it will, otherwise, enjoy a guy whos obviously comfortable in his own skin and appears to enjoy your company.
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    Nov 11, 2008 7:47 AM GMT
    the phone calls, IMs, texts, and video chats should be a clue
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    Nov 11, 2008 7:49 AM GMT
    kwboulder saidthe phone calls, IMs, texts, and video chats should be a clue


    yeah, you would think so, but i just wanted to make sure you are as fugly as your pictures.
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    Nov 11, 2008 7:51 AM GMT
    oh is that you that keeps calling?
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    Nov 11, 2008 8:18 AM GMT
    If you feel a force pushing against you multiple times, and that force is being produced by a hand attached to a guy, then he is hitting on you. icon_razz.gificon_lol.gificon_rolleyes.gif
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    Nov 11, 2008 5:17 PM GMT
    If a guy is looking at you, HE'S HITTING ON YOU!!!icon_idea.gif
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    Nov 11, 2008 6:07 PM GMT
    sounds cute
    i wish you guys get swept up in a torrent of passion as he battles over being straight yet having feelings for you, the only guy he's ever been attracted to
    icon_biggrin.gif
    who knows? it could happen
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    Nov 11, 2008 6:15 PM GMT
    I hope you just take a few steps back and take a few deep breaths. I guess his public displays of affection may be just that. It's a beautiful thing g. talk to him. where's the fire?
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Nov 11, 2008 8:18 PM GMT
    The next time the two of you are alone together, do something that ups the ante. If he responds, you're in.
  • gjoseph

    Posts: 250

    Nov 11, 2008 8:25 PM GMT
    Thank You guys so MUCH!! You guys are AWESOME =) definitely learned a-lot =) I'm just going to see where things lead. Gahh "str8" guys can be so confusing at times like once when I was in the bathroom washing my hands Hayden and another guy Sammy were in there and all of a sudden Hayden says "We fuck in here".

    Again Thank You guys so much the advice is greatly appreciated =)
    Take Care
    -Gerald
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    Nov 21, 2008 1:07 PM GMT
    BiGymGuy saidIf a guy is looking at you, HE'S HITTING ON YOU!!!icon_idea.gif

    Exactly. And watch his eyes. Guys who aren't hitting on you don't spend much time looking lower than your jaw.
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19136

    Nov 21, 2008 1:24 PM GMT
    Yeah, if you're talking to his face, and he's talking to your crotch, it's a dead-giveaway icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif
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    Nov 26, 2008 1:42 AM GMT
    Hmmm are you out? Does he know you are gay? If he know's ur gay and doing all that to you then maybe he is hitting on you for sure.

    But I have a hunch that you aren't out yet..... Tampa Catholic High gave it away yes?
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    Nov 26, 2008 1:57 AM GMT
    If he asks to give you a blow job, he's hitting on you.

    That's post number 200! Huzzah!
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    Nov 26, 2008 4:16 PM GMT
    haha, this reminds me so much of high school and of when I had the crush on the football jock. honestly, him and i were good friends and to this day I swear up and down that he's gay but you know, it just didnt work out.

    about the whole "we fuck in here" thing. Dude, they are 99% sure to be kidding. hell, i do it with my friends all the time about stupid random stuff. It's a guy thing i guess.

    If I can give any advice, just dont put yourself too far out there because the guy I liked gave all the signs (and more honestly) and nothing came of it. especially when I told him, the reverse actually happened.

    So not to be a pessimist, just dont get your hopes up. There are better guys out there that are comfortable with themselves and their sexuality that are perfect for you.
  • gjoseph

    Posts: 250

    Nov 26, 2008 5:30 PM GMT
    Thanks drewby =) I'm actually over him lol I finally went 2 a club last weekend with my best friend Kate and I was totally comfortable with myself danced with a couple of hot guys and my friend. Ever since that evening I definitely feel like a much "happier" person and have stopped fantasizing about the "what ifs" and "what can i do".
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Nov 26, 2008 5:46 PM GMT
    I am socially retarded. I can't tell when a guy is just being friendly or if his expressing a more personal interest.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 05, 2011 7:37 PM GMT
    A relevant clip to lighten the mood (from season two episode 10 of the NBC show Community). The clip begins a few seconds into the scene, but you'll get the idea. Abed is probably my favorite character from that show.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 05, 2011 8:00 PM GMT
    There's no guarantee of his actual desires based on his actions. I've known straight men who acted like that, but then when it came time to actually follow through on something real, they backed right off and took offense to any implication they were gay or wanted anything sexual.

    It's possible, that its a harmless male flirtation that is not indicative of a sexual desire he will ever admit to or act upon. Be careful with your own feelings in this situation. It may be years before he will actually accept his sexuality for what it is, if ever.
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    Jan 05, 2011 8:03 PM GMT
    Uh, guys, this thread is from 2008. I think the OP has moved on.
  • prime02

    Posts: 236

    Jan 05, 2011 9:38 PM GMT
    gjoseph saidHey y'all there's this guy that I REALLY & I mean REALLY feel attracted to his name is Hayden, and he plays football. It's kinda hard to explain this but he "spanks" me during akward times such as the (hallway, class) or whenever and actually hugs me. I always laugh when it happens I guess he knows that I like it IDK he is such a sweet guy he hasn't really been dating from what I understand I'm questioning him b/c he is so sexy with his muscles etc., and his personality (macho, etc.). Like how should I come on to him or should I at all? The last girl that I know he was with for sure was my friend Natalie but that was over with about 2 1/2 years ago. He is such an adorable guy ahh I just don't know what to do.

    Thanks =)


    I don't think he's interested in all in you.. I think you're just making yourself believe that he is. Sounds like you need more interaction that that. Most football guys, prefer guys that are very similar to themselves.. and by your profile, you seem the complete opposite. Unless it's one of the cases of opposites attract, but I don't think so in this one
  • MrPapo317

    Posts: 515

    Jan 05, 2011 9:40 PM GMT
    Ganymede80 saidUh, guys, this thread is from 2008. I think the OP has moved on.

    My thoughts exactly icon_neutral.gif