I don't know what to do...

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    Jul 28, 2013 3:52 AM GMT
    I find a guy on this site extremely good looking.. like I have a MAJOR crush on him. So we get talking Skype and phone numbers get passed around...We start texting etc... So far so good. I bring up a topic that we should meet up for a coffee.. This is maybe after a 4-5 days after we first started talking. He says we are still strangers and it's too soon.. I'm fine with that.. Sure we've met on a website and exchanged a few texts we are pretty much strangers. So I stop texting him for a while.. maybe 3-4 days? He sends me a text saying how was your weekend? So this is still fine.. We converse for a bit.. then he brings up the topic that he's alone tonight and he doesn't like it. So I act the fool and tell him so am I and I ask him for a drink... He says he doesn't want a drink BUT would be up for cuddling and for me to be sleeping at his... How on earth can somebody be so quick to change their minds about meeting up... I say this would be a good idea but it would be a weird first encounter.. So he agrees and I suggest maybe he comes around to mine on Saturday or Sunday.. I've sent him a text.. no reply. Has he just thought that's that? Nothing else than a an attempt at a one night stand? What's your opinion? What should I do?
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    Jul 28, 2013 3:59 AM GMT
    He's a fake profile. Move on.

    Or he's dating someone right now, and keeping you on the backburner if things don't work out with the other guy. Move on.

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    Jul 28, 2013 4:01 AM GMT
    Sounds like to me he was looking for some action and decided to hit you up to get some, that would clearly explain the quick reversal. Even if he does eventually text back, I wouldn't bother, he seems like a flake or to be hiding something.
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:05 AM GMT
    Thing is he's not a fake profile.. He's verified. But a wierd thing is... Every time I try to call him.. He never picks up.. He always just leaves it to voice mail..
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:12 AM GMT


    Walk away briskly, Blake.

    He wouldn't go for a coffee because it's too soon.

    If he calls (don't contact him anymore) be firm that coffee comes before cuddling.

    He didn't have to have a drink (like alcohol) as there are lots of non alcoholic drinks.
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:17 AM GMT
    Blake1990 saidThing is he's not a fake profile.. He's verified. But a wierd thing is... Every time I try to call him.. He never picks up.. He always just leaves it to voice mail..
    Since you're new here, I thought I'd let you know that we've had several Verified profiles here in the past that turned out to be complete fakes. Only way to truly verify him is to get him on cam, like Skype or Facetime or Google Hangout. So Verified status should be taken very lightly.
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:19 AM GMT
    I've got him on Skype.. he's never attempted to make a call... But he won't even talk on the phone?... What's the deal with that?
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:21 AM GMT
    He sounds like a fuckamagician, ditch him for someone hotter and nicer
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:22 AM GMT
    Move on. If he was truly interested in you, we wouldn't be having this discussion. I don't think you'll have any problems finding another guy. icon_wink.gif
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:22 AM GMT
    Not wanting to talk in the phone is a big red flag. There's someone around he doesn't want hearing any conversation with you. Possibly married or partnered.
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:24 AM GMT
    blkapollo saidNot wanting to talk in the phone is a big red flag. There's someone around he doesn't want hearing any conversation with you. Possibly married or partnered.


    That could be it... But why would he invite me to sleep and "cuddle" with him then?

    This could be a mistake on my behalf... he might actually be busy and I could be over reacting I don't know haha... It's a hot mess.
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:25 AM GMT
    Honestly, he sounds like a bit of a flake to me. Based on the behavior, I'm guessing that he just wanted a one night stand, and after you basically turned him down, he gave up and moved on.

    If he reaches out to you again, you could always give him another shot, but I'd be careful around him.
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:28 AM GMT
    Blake1990 said
    blkapollo saidNot wanting to talk in the phone is a big red flag. There's someone around he doesn't want hearing any conversation with you. Possibly married or partnered.


    That could be it... But why would he invite me to sleep and "cuddle" with him then?

    This could be a mistake on my behalf... he might actually be busy and I could be over reacting I don't know haha... It's a hot mess.


    If he does have somebody, they may not have been around the particular night he invited you over.
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:29 AM GMT
    Well that could be true... he mentioned he was alone tonight and didn't like it.. that could mean that there is someone else..
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:29 AM GMT
    meninlove said

    Walk away briskly, Blake.

    He wouldn't go for a coffee because it's too soon.

    If he calls (don't contact him anymore) be firm that coffee comes before cuddling.

    He didn't have to have a drink (like alcohol) as there are lots of non alcoholic drinks.


    +1

    Also, if they won't bring the "virtual" to "in real life" (over simply coffee none the less), then they're no better than porn or masturbation.

    You have too much to offer, Blake. Find somebody who appreciates you.
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:32 AM GMT
    GAMRican said
    meninlove said

    Walk away briskly, Blake.

    He wouldn't go for a coffee because it's too soon.

    If he calls (don't contact him anymore) be firm that coffee comes before cuddling.

    He didn't have to have a drink (like alcohol) as there are lots of non alcoholic drinks.


    +1

    Also, if they won't bring the "virtual" to "in real life" (over simply coffee none the less), then they're no better than porn or masturbation.

    You have too much to offer, Blake. Find somebody who appreciates you.



    But it's not as simple as just saying Bye Bye... I actually have a crush on this guy... I want it to work.. But I don't think it's going to happen..
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:34 AM GMT
    blkapollo saidNot wanting to talk in the phone is a big red flag. There's someone around he doesn't want hearing any conversation with you. Possibly married or partnered.



    ......or has a voice like Ethel Merman. icon_confused.gif
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    Jul 28, 2013 4:36 AM GMT
    Blake1990 said
    GAMRican said
    meninlove said

    Walk away briskly, Blake.

    He wouldn't go for a coffee because it's too soon.

    If he calls (don't contact him anymore) be firm that coffee comes before cuddling.

    He didn't have to have a drink (like alcohol) as there are lots of non alcoholic drinks.


    +1

    Also, if they won't bring the "virtual" to "in real life" (over simply coffee none the less), then they're no better than porn or masturbation.

    You have too much to offer, Blake. Find somebody who appreciates you.



    But it's not as simple as just saying Bye Bye... I actually have a crush on this guy... I want it to work.. But I don't think it's going to happen..


    Ah Blake, it is that simple. Your feelings and you are worth more. It's as plain for me to see as my own hand.

    Of course you want it to work. That's powerful but wasted on this fellow. Save it for the next one. icon_wink.gif

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    Jul 28, 2013 5:09 AM GMT
    If he doesn't reply.. I think I'll give up.. I wanted a relationship to happen.. But I guess I trusted and caved in too quickly... I can only hope he replies.
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    Jul 28, 2013 5:15 AM GMT
    Move the fuck on....

    And I say this in an ever loving manner....

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    Jul 28, 2013 5:17 AM GMT
    Blake1990 saidIf he doesn't reply.. I think I'll give up.. I wanted a relationship to happen.. But I guess I trusted and caved in too quickly... I can only hope he replies.


    DID you trust and cave too quickly?

    Or really, was it that he was/is a flake or a fake?

    This is important because truly, a relationship doesn't happen until it does, and there is no schedule. That said, sometimes taking your time with someone feelings wise is smart, and other times you snooze you lose. Each time it's different, as the chemistry will be unique to you and that other person.

    very warmly,

    -Doug



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    Jul 28, 2013 9:13 AM GMT
    Well... I don't know... He won't pick up his phone.. Hasn't texted me back.. I'll just see how it pans over these next few days... I could be totally wasting my time.

    Thank you all very much for your comments... They really mean a lot.
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    Jul 28, 2013 9:26 AM GMT
    Blake1990 saidWell... I don't know... He won't pick up his phone.. Hasn't texted me back.. I'll just see how it pans over these next few days... I could be totally wasting my time.

    Thank you all very much for your comments... They really mean a lot.


    What is it that you don't know? All of the signs are there telling you that you are indeed wasting your time with this guy. If he's being that flakey/avoiding with you, then what do you think a relationship with him will be like? You've been given advice to move on....you really need to follow that advice!
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    Jul 28, 2013 10:01 AM GMT
    sorry boo, but you need to move on.
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    Jul 28, 2013 10:37 AM GMT
    I know everyone is saying I need to move on... But what he's said to me before.. Seems like a average guy who does want to meet up.. But just very sporadic with his texts..I don't know if he's in another relationship with a guy.. I don't want to ask, because I don't want to upset him..