Turning 50: For those Feeling Old or Older

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    Aug 07, 2013 9:30 PM GMT
    Something I wrote to sum up how I feel. I didn't think it would hit me so hard. Maybe you can relate.

    http://www.victorrook.com/turning50.htm
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Aug 07, 2013 9:34 PM GMT
    Nicely done! icon_smile.gif
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    Aug 07, 2013 9:37 PM GMT
    icon_rolleyes.gif
  • HottJoe

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    Aug 07, 2013 9:40 PM GMT
    i2ci2i saidicon_rolleyes.gif

    Oooh, child!

    Shade
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    Aug 07, 2013 9:47 PM GMT
    Thanks. I turned 50 ten months ago, and I can relate. I try to imagine kids these days feeling about the 90's the way I felt about the 50's, but it isn't easy. I guess the huge difference is the internet. I have not kept up with the leaps in mobile connectivity.
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    Aug 07, 2013 10:55 PM GMT
    I was always an old soul so I was ready. As far as milestones go, my turning 50 for me was no big deal - though it was for my oncologist.
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    Aug 07, 2013 11:22 PM GMT
    eagermuscle saidI was always an old soul so I was ready. As far as milestones go, my turning 50 for me was no big deal - though it was for my oncologist.



    I can't imagine the horrible shit you have had to endure.
    More power to you! As re: old souls. I remember being in third or fourth thinking what a bunch of children my peers were....icon_lol.gif
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Aug 07, 2013 11:54 PM GMT
    I'm 15 years ahead of you. I wish I could write the way real novelists do. I have plenty of material from childhood, through the 1960s and then again from the mid-70s to the present. It has been one hell of a ride.

    My 50th birthday was memorable. I've been trying to write it out but not being a real 'writer' it doesn't come easily. Just one snippet: I'm back home where I grew up standing outside the clinic where I was born at the stroke of midnight, the beginning of my 50th birthday. From there I go around the town square to a bar to have a drink. Since I'm a stranger in town and know no one (I'd left LONG ago) eventually one guy comes up to my table and introduces himself. One thing leads to another as we're getting to know one another and he finds out who I am (he knows my family) *and* that it is my 50th birthday. So he gets up and announces this to the whole tavern, resulting in everyone -- all complete strangers -- singing happy B day to me and plying me with booze. There's way more I'm leaving out but suffice it to say it was hilarious.

    I didn't really mind my 50s that much but it was during them that I began to *feel* old. I've actually kind of gone through that and out the other side so that I more or less feel younger now than I did then. Still, there's no getting around it. We can keep ourselves healthy better and longer now than ever but it is clear there is a limit. I have friends in their 70s and 80s (and my parents lived to their 90s) so I see first hand the ravages time has on our bodies.

    You're right to want to make the best of the time you have, though, because truth be told, none of us know how long that is going to be. Both my partners died in their early 50s (10+ years apart). For me the most important thing is to have as few regrets as possible.
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    Aug 08, 2013 12:06 AM GMT
    I started to come out at 48, by the time I turned 50 I was crazy about the fact my youth was longggg gone. Today im 52 and Im pleased to say,
    i still hate being old! icon_wink.gif
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    Aug 08, 2013 12:40 AM GMT
    Very nice and moving. Sometimes the younger folks look at you like you were a different entity. If only you could morph into some younger form and tell them "hey, I'm just like you, I like to dance all night too! My spirit is still the same, please believe me!"
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    Aug 08, 2013 12:42 AM GMT
    OMG almost half a century old. It makes me think back to all the loved ones we lost in the 1980s and 90s, young men who never got to be 30, or even 40, let alone 50; yet the band still plays on; happy B'day.
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    Aug 08, 2013 12:49 AM GMT
    bachian saidVery nice and moving. Sometimes the younger folks look at you like you were a different entity. If only you could morph into some younger form and tell them "hey, I'm just like you, I like to dance all night too! My spirit is still the same, please believe me!"

    It is and it isn't. You are still the same person. But your life experiences have accumulated to the point they amplify your perceptions. Each moment is felt in several dimensions - what is happening now, and how what is happening now resonates with many similar moments in the past. It's sort of like drinking a fine wine that has many complex notes and after-notes.
    And like a fine wine, it should be savored.
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    Aug 08, 2013 1:20 AM GMT
    First of all, Happy 50th. I totally understand. 50 is quickly approaching, and I am getting nervous about a new chapter in my life...My two children are moving into young adulthood, my parents are gone and I am moving up the ranks as a senior person in my family. I am the youngest of ten so its hard to think of myself as older......but aging is part of life.. I want to laugh more, worry less, and not only stop to smell the roses but pick a few of them...... CONGRATS!
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    Aug 08, 2013 1:24 AM GMT
    It's so... absurd to be 50.
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    Aug 08, 2013 1:37 AM GMT
    We wish you 50 more years of good health,happiness love and peace.Ryan and Ruben icon_smile.gif
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    Aug 08, 2013 2:22 AM GMT
    Interestingly enough I didn't mind as much about 50 as I did about 40. Looking back now that I came out at 50, the 50s seem pretty old and I feel like I missed a lot in the gay world icon_sad.gif
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    Aug 08, 2013 2:26 AM GMT
    ^^^^^ this totally...
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    Aug 08, 2013 2:37 AM GMT
    Vic -- That's a beautiful piece of writing. I definitely am increasingly conscious of mortality since I turned 50 two years ago. Gotta make each day count. But I do feel fit, energetic and optimistic about life. Happy Birthday and welcome to the prime of your life!
  • whytehot

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    Aug 08, 2013 2:46 AM GMT
    We have several threads about how much it sucks to be old, yet older forumers routinely brag about how many college guys they attract. Wonder which one is the lie.
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    Aug 08, 2013 2:49 AM GMT
    I'm really not afraid of growing old. Fifty is nothing. I was raised by grandparents who stayed fit and good looking until their deaths. Thanks to exercise, swimming, walking, tennis, golf, gardening, travel, good moisturizers, a little nip&tuck for her, keeping the gray out of their hair - they looked amazing. They traveled non-stop - smiled, had fun and a fulfilling sex life. My grandfather did his situps, pushups, swam laps, and looked 60-something at 80-something - like an older Cary Grant type. Anyway - what I'm saying is we can all work at looking our best and having a blast as the years come.
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    Aug 08, 2013 2:58 AM GMT
    The only down side I have noticed since turning 50 is that suddenly younger people seem to let the word 50 prevent them from getting to know the person who has earned it. Kind of weird.icon_confused.gif

    I am proud of every one of my 51 years and look at my 50's as a gift. There are soooo many people who would have given anything to say they made it to their 50's.

    Your gift is that you CAN say you made it to your 50's.

    Savor the moment. icon_wink.gif
  • BuggEyedSprit...

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    Aug 08, 2013 4:07 AM GMT
    That was so, like, 10 years ago...icon_wink.gif
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    Aug 08, 2013 5:06 AM GMT
    Pffft!


    I'll be 58 in November. Doesn't bother me a bit. It may bother others! I don't care. My 40th High School Reunion is coming up.....that should be fun!

    Live every day and enjoy it. I still work out and at decent weights and never have never been on a real diet. Lucky I guess and lucky to be alive considering everything!
  • Cabrov

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    Aug 08, 2013 5:13 AM GMT
    Just turned 60. I look back at the last ten years. Somehow, I feel that I was more attractive to other guys once I was older than 45. I am amazed how many young guys are really into older men. Makes life so much fun. Do not look back and weep, look forward with a smile.....oh, and don't forget your regular medical check ups.
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    Aug 08, 2013 7:34 AM GMT
    wrestlervic saidSomething I wrote to sum up how I feel. I didn't think it would hit me so hard. Maybe you can relate.

    http://www.victorrook.com/turning50.htm



    You can choose to live in the now and feel light and unburdened by time. What did Jesus say about being like little children?