Gay comebacks

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    Aug 08, 2013 8:39 AM GMT
    So if you walk down the street with or without a bf and suddenly a straight dude sees you and says faggot. How would you respond? I havent had the occasion but I just dont know how I will react in order to do a comeback to defend my sexual orientation.
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    Aug 08, 2013 9:03 AM GMT
    I've never had this happen to me, but I always imagined that someone would say that to me while walking around with my gay friends. I don't know what I'd say. . .
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    Aug 08, 2013 9:21 AM GMT
    'thanks, now tell me what I don't know' icon_lol.gif
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    Aug 08, 2013 10:57 AM GMT
    Guy: "Faggot!"
    You: "I hope Your dick is bigger than your dad's!!"

    Run like hell!!
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    Aug 08, 2013 12:39 PM GMT
    SirAndy said'thanks, now tell me what I don't know' icon_lol.gif


    Haha nice ill try that if I ever get the comment
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    Aug 08, 2013 12:42 PM GMT
    First person to ever call me faggot was a guy in college. Guess I had done well to go so long and not not be called one? He said it in a low tone under his breath. Maybe he thought I didn't hear it but I did. I could have made a scene and been like the crazy gay black guy in class, but I just played like I didn't hear it since no one else did. But I gave him dirty looks and eye contact the rest of the year which always made him feel uncomfortable. lol
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Aug 08, 2013 1:02 PM GMT
    I'd probably calmly call him a "redneck bigot" .. or just a bigot.

    The days of being called names like that should be over and done. Anybody who does that is a simple fuckwad.
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    Aug 08, 2013 1:08 PM GMT
    Say, "You're the faggot."
    It's hard to think fast in situations like these so, the few times I've been in them, I say back what-ever was said to me.
    Even if it makes no sense it works somehow.
    (Or "Heil Hitler" might work also.)
  • madsexy

    Posts: 4843

    Aug 08, 2013 1:09 PM GMT
    When he says "faggot", say:
    "Yup sure am and I know you wish you could be one, but the Gay Club requirement is that your dick has to be THIS big [hold up hands wide apart] to be one of us and you're sadly nowhere near big enough".
    Then run like hell. icon_lol.gif
  • Hothouse

    Posts: 2204

    Aug 08, 2013 1:13 PM GMT
    Years ago I was going out and as I walked down the sidewalk to the entrance to the gay bar some guys across the street at a straight bar yelled "faggot" at me. I walked into the bar and said to the bar owner, a lesbian who was very protective of her patrons, that the boys across the street were misbehaving.
    She grabbed a baseball bat from behind the bar, walked out the door and yelled across the street that they had better watch their mouths or she'd be over to teach them a lesson.
    They quickly hightailed it back inside.

    So, I don't have a snappy comeback, but it is always good when a friend has your back.
  • madsexy

    Posts: 4843

    Aug 08, 2013 1:16 PM GMT
    Hothouse saidYears ago I was going out and as I walked down the sidewalk to the entrance to the gay bar some guys across the street at a straight bar yelled "faggot" at me. I walked into the bar and said to the bar owner, a lesbian who was very protective of her patrons, that the boys across the street were misbehaving.
    She grabbed a baseball bat from behind the bar, walked out the door and yelled across the street that they had better watch their mouths or she'd be over to teach them a lesson.
    They quickly hightailed it back inside.

    So, I don't have a snappy comeback, but it is always good when a friend has your back.


    Lesbians can be such great attack dogs! And all gay men are preternaturally terrified of angry lesbians.
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    Aug 08, 2013 1:30 PM GMT
    madsexy said
    Hothouse saidYears ago I was going out and as I walked down the sidewalk to the entrance to the gay bar some guys across the street at a straight bar yelled "faggot" at me. I walked into the bar and said to the bar owner, a lesbian who was very protective of her patrons, that the boys across the street were misbehaving.
    She grabbed a baseball bat from behind the bar, walked out the door and yelled across the street that they had better watch their mouths or she'd be over to teach them a lesson.
    They quickly hightailed it back inside.

    So, I don't have a snappy comeback, but it is always good when a friend has your back.


    Lesbians can be such great attack dogs! And all gay men are preternaturally terrified of angry lesbians.


    I have a straight female friend who stood up for her other gay friends when one was leaning on the shoulder of the other in the bus. The guys in front started giggling and pointing. She freaking lost it and yelled at them. In the end it was the guys stop and she opened the window and spat on them. Can always count of female friends to stand up?
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    Aug 08, 2013 1:36 PM GMT
    "That's Mr. Faggot to you." Then he laughs and you become good friends. In a movie.
  • madsexy

    Posts: 4843

    Aug 08, 2013 1:41 PM GMT
    Philibuster said"That's Mr. Faggot to you." Then he laughs and you become good friends. In a movie.


    If it's the movie . . . then there's the next scene where he breaks up with his girlfriend, gets raging drunk, confesses he wishes girls were more like me, his best bud, his hand, previously patting me on the shoulder flops drunkenly to my ass and then he's wildly fucking me and screaming "OH FUCKING YEAH THIS IS HOW IT SHOULD BE!".
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    Aug 08, 2013 1:52 PM GMT
    That's when you say, "Don't worry about it! You're not my type!"
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    Aug 08, 2013 1:53 PM GMT
    madsexy said
    Philibuster said"That's Mr. Faggot to you." Then he laughs and you become good friends. In a movie.


    If it's the movie . . . then there's the next scene where he breaks up with his girlfriend, gets raging drunk, confesses he wishes girls were more like me, his best bud, his hand, previously patting me on the shoulder flops drunkenly to my ass and then he's wildly fucking me and screaming "OH FUCKING YEAH THIS IS HOW IT SHOULD BE!".


    I think thats more of YOUR fantasy lol
  • Just_A_Boy

    Posts: 3

    Aug 08, 2013 1:57 PM GMT
    So my friends and i were out at the club and decided to go to ihop before going home. we ate our food and were standing in the parking lot saying our goodbyes, this table that was seated on the other side of the restaurant left right after we did, as we were standing there they got into the car and as they were pulling out started screaming homophobic slurs at us
    (a few of us were in pride shirts and my one friend wears a lot of make and he has a beard to go with his glittery cheeks lol).
    we ignored it that night and went home. well one of the guys with us works for the DMV and he got their plate number as they pulled off... and he may or may not have keyed their car, slashed the tires, and spray painted homophobe on their windshield

    (i had no part in the vandalism and did not support his decision in this at all)
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Aug 08, 2013 2:02 PM GMT
    I was working in my driveway when some young teen kids walked by, one said "You're a fucking faggot!" to me. I replied "That's what your dad likes me to call him when he's sucking my dick."
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    Aug 08, 2013 2:17 PM GMT
    I would probably say thank you.
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    Aug 08, 2013 2:28 PM GMT
    Philibuster said"That's Mr. Faggot to you." Then he laughs and you become good friends. In a movie.

    Oh yeah - I forgot about that one - the best come back ever.
    I told a guy at work to use it once because a guy kept calling him "Penis head."
    He screwed it up though and proudly said back, "My name is MISTER Penis head."
    Not quite the same sting.

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    Aug 08, 2013 2:37 PM GMT
    Timbales saidI was working in my driveway when some young teen kids walked by, one said "You're a fucking faggot!" to me. I replied "That's what your dad likes me to call him when he's sucking my dick."


    I always remember this quote from another posting and have it cocked and loaded to use. icon_lol.gif
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    Aug 08, 2013 2:41 PM GMT
  • BlackBeltGuy

    Posts: 2609

    Aug 08, 2013 2:57 PM GMT
    just say
    "He who says faggot first sucks the best cock"
  • Apparition

    Posts: 3516

    Aug 08, 2013 2:59 PM GMT
    either ignore them, give them the thumbs up, or kiss the boy im with and then snake slither my tongue at the offender.

    i have a pink bicycle helmet and they yell this all the time, i like when they do it from a moving car and then get stuck at a red light and I catch up, its usually teenagers in mommys car, i usually make a point of pulling up beside the passenger (usually the offender) and embarrassing the crap out of him to his friends (do i know you, were you that twink i fucked a couple months ago? or just pulling my keys out and saying "nice car..too bad about the huge scratch you got in it!" at this point the driver usually goes insane since he cant see and yells at the passenger. for some reason the drivers are usually a little more responsible than the moochers riding with him.
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    Aug 08, 2013 4:26 PM GMT
    Philibuster said"That's Mr. Faggot to you." Then he laughs and you become good friends. In a movie.


    I laughed pretty hard at this.