Okay. Be honest.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2008 3:27 AM GMT
    Are you REALLY straight-acting?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2008 3:30 AM GMT
    Hell No! It's hard enough to get noticed being gay never mind trying to pretend I'm straight.icon_smile.gif
  • dfrourke

    Posts: 1062

    Nov 14, 2008 3:31 AM GMT
    no. never claimed to be.

    *snap*

    gay-parade.jpg

    - David icon_wink.gif
  • Thirdbeach

    Posts: 1364

    Nov 14, 2008 3:34 AM GMT
    I thought "Acting" meant you are faking it, or pretending.

    So is it possible to "REALLY straight-acting"?

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    Nov 14, 2008 5:04 AM GMT

    We usually have to tell straight people we're gay. So we do.
    Some get a bit hostile and it's pretty funny. They feel we insult their much vaunted 'gaydar'. Ya gotta love straight people who pride themselves on being gay experts.

    But we don't and never have 'acted' straight. Just Bill and Doug.
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    Nov 14, 2008 5:06 AM GMT
    I dont know if im straight acting, im just myself, and my friends never realized I was gay till I told them, so I guess I look straight
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    Nov 14, 2008 5:13 AM GMT
    I'm going to be honest. I'm considered straight acting. This is somewhat of a curse. When no one thinks you're gay, you have to come out. Every time you meet someone. It gets tiresome. Especially when I have the option to lie every time.
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    Nov 14, 2008 5:19 AM GMT
    lol

    I know some straight dudes who act more gay than I do. Acting Homo...I am me, so what.icon_cool.gif
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    Nov 14, 2008 5:26 AM GMT
    A "straight" boy I took home a few weeks back told me I was the most straight acting at the party of gay guys (admittedly not hard given the guest list). Man was he f****** up sexually.

    I thought I tread the line between too gay to function at times and particularly straight at others.

    personally I don't like the term acting, it implies I'm making an effort to imitate straight mannerisms because i ought to be ashamed that I'm gay icon_confused.gif
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    Nov 14, 2008 5:57 AM GMT
    honestly yes.
  • EricLA

    Posts: 3461

    Nov 14, 2008 9:05 AM GMT
    I think I'm somewhere in the middle. I'm definitely not effeminate, but I certainly not super macho. My closest friend in high school, when I came out to him, said I could have passed as straight in the military. I don't view myself that way. And since coming out of the closet I'm probably nowhere near as stiff as I was, I'm probably more relaxed and if some "gayness" shines out, that's okay.
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    Nov 14, 2008 9:07 AM GMT
    charlitos saidI dont know if im straight acting, im just myself, and my friends never realized I was gay till I told them, so I guess I look straight



    2nd that.
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    Nov 14, 2008 10:49 AM GMT
    I constantly have to reassure people of my gayness. Some still don't believe me.
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    Nov 14, 2008 1:05 PM GMT
    Oh no. My personality it much too soft for that kind of shenanigans
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    Nov 14, 2008 1:10 PM GMT
    CitizenSol saidAre you REALLY straight-acting?

    i think we need a working definition of "straight-acting" to answer your question accurately.
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    Nov 14, 2008 1:11 PM GMT
    I don't believe in using that term. It resonates with me as much as speaking in tongues does. Which means not at all.
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    Nov 14, 2008 1:37 PM GMT
    I don't like the term either - because it tends to suggest acting straight to cover up being gay. While I don't "act" straight, I know that a number of guys over the years have said (after they've gotten to know me) that they thought I was straight. I guess I make a straight "impression" but it is not intentional. I actually thought I came across more or less gay - because of my look (kind of put together GQ style most days - clean/in shape, etc.) I'm just me.
  • DiverScience

    Posts: 1426

    Nov 14, 2008 2:08 PM GMT
    I haven't acted anything since Freshman year of college.

    So the answer is, "no."

    Oddly, *because* of this, people have a harder time identifying me as gay than they used to when I was "hiding" it. Now that I'm not worrying about it and it's not filling my every thought, a lot of people just don't notice.

    Which is more than fine with me
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    Nov 14, 2008 2:19 PM GMT
    stormboy83 said
    CitizenSol saidAre you REALLY straight-acting?

    i think we need a working definition of "straight-acting" to answer your question accurately.


    For real! I mean, if I am "straight-acting" does that mean I still sleep with women (or want to)? If so, then I am as gay as they come. If not, then I don't know what the hell it means.
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    Nov 14, 2008 2:33 PM GMT
    This whole idea of "straight acting" comes from the stereotype notion that gay men are easily identified because they act effeminate. Which is bunk.

    When a gay man appears to be straight, all you're seeing is a man who falls within the normal range of male mannerisms, who happens to be gay.

    I can rebuild a car engine. Does that mean I'm "acting straight"?
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    Nov 14, 2008 2:52 PM GMT
    It's not so much an act as it is me being the way I am. I doubt that most strangers or casual acquaintances would suspect that I'm gay, but I don't go out of my way to mask my sexual orientation.
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    Nov 14, 2008 2:59 PM GMT
    Yeah, normally if I tell someone I'm gay...it takes a long time for them to believe me. I basically have to stop short of sucking off a guy for them to believe me. Lol. But I don't try to be"straight-acting." I just act like me.
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    Nov 14, 2008 3:03 PM GMT
    The ability to seem straight by acting any particular way is a good indication of how little the world understands what GAY is.

    I have counseled a couple of young guys who were concerned that they were too feminine or soft ... I don't think there's anything at all wrong with altering your behavior a bit to be more the man you want to be, any more than there is anything wrong with changing your haircut or clothes. But the idea that "acting" makes you seem straight is dumb, if not offensive. My hackles are raised by straight guys "acting" gay, as if they know what that is.

    We all have acquired behaviors, and all found our "authentic" selves partly through acting the part as we grew up.

    I think I can usually tell if the straightest-appearing guy in the room is gay, just by the way he looks at and relates to other men. At the same time, there are a lot of straight guys who "fool me" into thinking they're card-carrying HRC members.
  • TexanMan82

    Posts: 893

    Nov 14, 2008 3:05 PM GMT
    To those who don't know me well, or I just met, I am very masculine and no one ever guesses I'm gay. It's rather annoying actually. It's not very easy to meet guys when no one thinks you're gay.

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    Nov 14, 2008 3:26 PM GMT
    CitizenSol saidI'm going to be honest. I'm considered straight acting. This is somewhat of a curse. When no one thinks you're gay, you have to come out. Every time you meet someone. It gets tiresome. Especially when I have the option to lie every time.


    I know what you mean. It seems of have lots of mini coming out experiences all the time, having to correct people who assume I am straight. Yes, it is tiresome. Sometimes I just go with their assumption and sometimes it's important enough to correct the wrong impression.

    Sometimes I wonder if my "energy" is preventing great gay guys from approaching me. Even at gay clubs, I've been asked by gay guys if I am straight. And at clubs where there are straight women, gay men (mixed), when I am dancing, I'm surrounded by women dancing alongside me....and their purses get in the way.

    BTW........I'm just being who I am...not acting.