Does the term "Straight acting" irritate you?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 25, 2013 5:33 PM GMT
    I know there is this huge stigma on "Straight acting" gay guys. My past exes have never gotten along with my guy friends simply because they were a little more on the flamboyant side, and my guy friends tell me they just dont know what to talk about with them. Its something I personally take pride upon, being a straight acting gay man... I don't judge other gay guys who may be feminine, but Im personally just not attracted to it anymore. Well I never really was, but I can never find a straight acting gay guy lol. So from the real jock community, does it irritate you guys when gay men identify themselves as "straight acting" or do you prefer it? Personally, I prefer it. Id like someone to chill with my guy friends.
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    Aug 25, 2013 5:45 PM GMT
    Damn
    and you were doing so well on here up till now.


    The "I can't find a straight acting gay guy paradox"

    **Que headless torso parade.
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    Aug 25, 2013 5:58 PM GMT
    You've been here longer than I have, K1O. Have you not noticed the hundred threads about how the phrase annoys some people... and then me and a few others jumping in asking "What's the problem?"
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    Aug 25, 2013 6:20 PM GMT
    Yes.
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    Aug 25, 2013 6:36 PM GMT
    Not much, it stopped irritating me when I began to avoid paying attention to it & ignoring similar kind of descriptions.

    You're either irritated or delighted to something as long as you pay attention to that something, right!
    That's what anyone needs to do.
    unless that something pokes you constantly.
    In this case, I strongly believe that we can avoid getting poked.
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    Aug 25, 2013 7:31 PM GMT
    Hm, i probably should have done a search through the forums. But I joined a long time ago, but I only became active about 2 weeks ago. Like posting in the forums and logging in.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Aug 25, 2013 7:39 PM GMT
    Straight acting is a stupid term ... Do you mean straight acting like Pat Buchanan or straight acting like Hugh Hefner?
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    Aug 25, 2013 7:43 PM GMT
    here we go again. Summary: stop getting irritated by something that does not concern to you. The term simply means "non fem gay guy", any other interpretation is a stupid and obsessive appeal to terminology in order to justify your own insecurities.
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    Aug 25, 2013 7:44 PM GMT
    I get the point it tries to convey and maybe if more gay men had a clue as to what 'acting masculine' meant, a term like this wouldn't be necessary. But, I try not to use the term because I can see how it would imply all gay people are feminine and all straight guys are masculine.

    Also, I know what you mean with the boyfriend/straight friends type thing. Though for me, it's more about my family. For one, I don't like feminine guys, and two, I would be much more nervous about introducing a boyfriend to my father if he were a stereotypical gay.
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    Aug 25, 2013 7:47 PM GMT
    k10malau saidHm, i probably should have done a search through the forums. But I joined a long time ago, but I only became active about 2 weeks ago. Like posting in the forums and logging in.

    Pardon K10.
    Ask whatever you like.
    It's just that the annoyance over the simple, inoffensive, and descriptive term "straight acting" gets blown out of proportion here over and over again. God forbid anyone should try to communicate with words instead of gifs.
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    Aug 25, 2013 7:59 PM GMT
    I'm not irritated by it. Often times the "straight acting" guys exhibit some femme characteristics when you meet them in person. Acting, indeed. icon_lol.gif
  • Sakura

    Posts: 188

    Aug 25, 2013 8:01 PM GMT
    Yep. "Straight acting" is a charade, and phonies are never cool. Being masculine is awesome, I'm masculine myself, but if it's not who you are you'll hate yourself later for forcing it. People that are themselves are naturally happier and happiness is attractive, while being deceitful is an ugly quality. It's OK to be attracted to masculine guys or feminine guys, just don't request someone who is not being themselves.
  • BmwKid92

    Posts: 1097

    Aug 25, 2013 8:04 PM GMT
    what xrichx said... and nope not bothered by it
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    Aug 25, 2013 8:06 PM GMT
    Hm, I guess ive never took the term "straight-acting" as someone literally acting to be more masculine or straight.. although it makes perfect sense. Ive seen it just as a term that kinda means a gay guy who is masculine , not trying to just act the part. I understand.
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    Aug 25, 2013 8:22 PM GMT
    You guys need to have this discussion with your liberal hetero friends since its the liberal media which stereotypes gays males on tv, film and news as feminine (what heteros call not straight), drama queens, substance abusers, helpless victims, child molesters, sex fiends, suicidal, narcissistic and where gays always end up unhappy.

    If you have a violence against gays problems in your community, you need to organize Guardian Angel teams to protect your community.

    Invite your hetero friends to see the movie "Shelter" which knocks down many gay stereotypes such as gay males never being masculine.
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    Aug 25, 2013 9:06 PM GMT
    mx5guynj saidYou guys need to have this discussion with your liberal hetero friends since its the liberal media which stereotypes gays males on tv, film and news as feminine (what heteros call not straight), drama queens, substance abusers, helpless victims, child molesters, sex fiends, suicidal, narcissistic and where gays always end up unhappy.


    Yeah.. only liberals try to depict gays this way. Give me a break. I'm an Oklahoma born and raised conservative on MANY issues, and I would never try to insinuate that conservatives don't do this either. In fact, I can see 'liberals' trying to see both sides of the spectrum, whereas I can see conservatives never wanting to admit that gay guys just possibly might be normal.
  • Christoforos

    Posts: 264

    Aug 25, 2013 9:14 PM GMT
    To no fucking end. I'm not putting on a fucking act. I am who I am.
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    Aug 25, 2013 9:15 PM GMT
    Philibuster said"Straight Acting" never bothered me until I ran into guys who were obviously engaging in wishful thinking. Then it became a way to weed out profiles. On a tangent, VGL definitely meant bitchy queen in my book. Today's apps all include pictures, so VGL doesn't get used as much.


    This is the reason I am suspicious when guys proclaim that they are straight-acting. I feel like it is pretty obvious when you meet someone what their tendencies are. I have never.. ever met a gay man who does not have his 'moments', but I think being gay, we pick up on such actions more readily than our straight counterparts. Women might label it as being 'in touch with his feminine side' or being 'sensitive'. Gay guys tend to just call it 'feminine-acting' with a negative connotation.
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    Aug 25, 2013 9:15 PM GMT
    "Straight Acting" never bothered me until I ran into guys who were obviously engaging in wishful thinking. On a tangent, "VGL" definitely meant bitch in my book. Today's apps all include pictures, so "VGL" doesn't get used as much.
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    Aug 25, 2013 9:31 PM GMT
    The term "straight acting" does annoy me because there is no one way to be gay or one way to be straight or one way to be anything in between.

    Still, to each his own. I won't begrudge someone else's right to describe himself however he wishes. But, it's definitely a turn-off for me when someone does describe himself that way.
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    Aug 25, 2013 9:36 PM GMT
    Straight acting = i'll be done in 30 seconds. After that you're on your own.
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    Aug 25, 2013 9:51 PM GMT
    Ah. I see basically everyone hates the term. But thanks guys for showing me the difference between being masculine and straight-acting. I wont think they are one in the same anymore.
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    Aug 25, 2013 9:58 PM GMT
    k10malau saidI know there is this huge stigma on "Straight acting" gay guys. My past exes have never gotten along with my guy friends simply because they were a little more on the flamboyant side, and my guy friends tell me they just dont know what to talk about with them. Its something I personally take pride upon, being a straight acting gay man... I don't judge other gay guys who may be feminine, but Im personally just not attracted to it anymore. Well I never really was, but I can never find a straight acting gay guy lol. So from the real jock community, does it irritate you guys when gay men identify themselves as "straight acting" or do you prefer it? Personally, I prefer it. Id like someone to chill with my guy friends.


    There shall be a freedom of choice. No one can dictate You to act this or that way and no one shall attack You for that. Acting straight is easier. If You want to have straight friends, they'll would prefer You to act straight (female acting beings at waiting for them at home so they are not needed on men's events...). If You what to find boyfriend or mate, it's good too - gays are usually attracted to men so if You'll behave like one, You'll be more wanted...and it's just sexy :-D
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Aug 25, 2013 10:03 PM GMT
    Ridiculous description... when someone uses that phrase, he is being insensitive at least...

    icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Aug 25, 2013 10:07 PM GMT
    To answer this question.... I immediately [X] out the profile of anyone on the Internet who has this in his bio. I think it's sad that people still refer to themselves as straight-acting. Homophobia and inequality won't really go away until we do away with the stupid labels.

    I can definitely tolerate "masculine" as a description of someone, even though I choose not to use the word to describe myself anymore. I don't really find it offensive, and I understand why people use it (just to say "hey, I'm not a queen" -- which can be fine). But I understand why others would be turned off by the word when used a self-description.

    You're a man, being masculine should come with the territory by default, yes?