What's with the 'epidemic' of chasing "straight" guys?!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 19, 2008 6:17 PM GMT
    I mean really?! In just the past month, there have been half a dozen threads started by guys saying "Oh I like this guy but he says he's straight OR has a gf OR doesn't know if he's gay OR I don't know if he's gay OR....."

    WTF?! Are these guys so desperate for something, anything or so confused themselves that they're willingly flinging themselves at these brick walls?

    I mean...really?
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    Nov 19, 2008 7:11 PM GMT
    Well beside all of the fluff of guys are just infatuated or lusting after straight men, I think a lot of men really fall in love with straight guys. Sometimes you can't help it. However, what they need to be told is that loving someone doesn't make them love you back. Unfortunately.
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    Nov 19, 2008 7:14 PM GMT
    When I was in the closet and not dating or having sex, I would develop crushes on straight guys, simply because that is who I was exposed to. There were far fewer openly gay men in the late 70s and early 80s. The internet was not even on the horizon yet. As soon as I started going out in the gay community, straight guys became persona non grata.

    I think with some guys it really is who they hang around with. It is hard not to develop feelings for some straight guys if you rarely interact with gay or bi-sexuals.
  • vindog

    Posts: 1440

    Nov 19, 2008 8:09 PM GMT
    SurrealLife saidWhen I was in the closet and not dating or having sex, I would develop crushes on straight guys, simply because that is who I was exposed to. There were far fewer openly gay men in the late 70s and early 80s. The internet was not even on the horizon yet. As soon as I started going out in the gay community, straight guys became persona non grata.

    I think with some guys it really is who they hang around with. It is hard not to develop feelings for some straight guys if you rarely interact with gay or bi-sexuals.



    I like manly guys....who tend to be straight. It sucks but I am getting better about laughing off my crushes and making fun of myself for them.


    In fact, when I come and tell my roommate I met a hot man, he always laughs and says "Straight guy, I take it?"


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 19, 2008 8:09 PM GMT
    gay men who consistently fall in love with straight men are exactly like fag hags.

    It is so easy to fall in love with a straight man. You can beat your meat imagining how hot they are but risk absolutely nothing. There will never be a date. There will never be a roll in the hay. There will never be an emotional commitment. Just a fantasy and a distraction from pursuing a meaningful, vulnerable relationship.
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    Nov 19, 2008 8:11 PM GMT
    MunchingZombie saidgay men who consistently fall in love with straight men are exactly like fag hags.

    It is so easy to fall in love with a straight man. You can beat your meat imagining how hot they are but risk absolutely nothing. There will never be a date. There will never be a roll in the hay. There will never be an emotional commitment. Just a fantasy and a distraction from pursuing a meaningful, vulnerable relationship.


    QFT
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    Nov 19, 2008 8:30 PM GMT
    MunchingZombie saidgay men who consistently fall in love with straight men are exactly like fag hags.

    It is so easy to fall in love with a straight man. You can beat your meat imagining how hot they are but risk absolutely nothing. There will never be a date. There will never be a roll in the hay. There will never be an emotional commitment. Just a fantasy and a distraction from pursuing a meaningful, vulnerable relationship.


    I don't think that is true at all. It is way more painful to fall in love with a straight guy than to risk going out with some gay you're not even attracted to.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 19, 2008 8:52 PM GMT
    So, we get like a handful of threads and its an epidemic, good lord, I wonder what all those underwear threads are, how your fav sexual position threads or hell what about the political threads..

    MunchingZombie saidThere will never be a roll in the hay.


    I don't know about that icon_redface.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 19, 2008 8:56 PM GMT
    here we go again...

    no matter what is posted on this thread, "i've heard it all before"

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    Nov 19, 2008 8:58 PM GMT
    dancerjack saidhere we go again...

    no matter what is posted on this thread, "i've heard it all before"



    "Ive heard it all before... i've heard it all before... I dont wanna hear! I dont wanna know! Please don't say you're sorry!"
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 19, 2008 9:20 PM GMT
    I can't say that I have ever fallen in love with a straight guy and while it might be argued that I may have lusted after a straight guy - I never pursued him so I don't trully know if he was 100% straight.

    But it might be that we want what we can't have...
    Like I want substance and not just in my pudding.

    But I haven't found it and really... I hardly ever eat pudding. icon_eek.gif

    yep

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 19, 2008 11:04 PM GMT
    I think in many cases it is the notion that we and society put on ourselves that we are damaged or inadequate in some way. I mean I think it is good that we have all kinds of friends (orientation, gender, race, ethnic groups) because it helps us grow and see things that we would not normally see.

    However being overly enthralled and practically worshiping straight guys I think points to issues with how gays see themselves and other gays.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 19, 2008 11:13 PM GMT
    Odds are 9 to 1 for developing a crush on a straight guy, from a scattershot point of view.

    This "epidemic" comes from a lack of specificity in pursuits and chance encounters.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 19, 2008 11:20 PM GMT
    I fell in love with 6 str8 guys today, a puddy tat, a cute dog and three members of the mormon tabernacle choir.
    can't wait for tomorrow.
    I understand what you are saying gigadu but I'm just fucking horny.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 19, 2008 11:27 PM GMT
    MunchingZombie saidThere will never be a roll in the hay.

    Apparently you're not familiar with tequila? icon_lol.gif
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    Nov 19, 2008 11:31 PM GMT
    I don't think that there is an epidemic.

    There are 10s of thousands of guys on RJ. Some are newbies to the gay world, and those are the most likely to post about something like that. Any guy that is settled in gay life, does not have self-hate, and is clear on setting goals to aspire to find guys who are attainable (meaning, gay), wouldn't post such a thread.


  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Nov 19, 2008 11:36 PM GMT
    It's the Gay Man's version of Cutting icon_confused.gif
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    Nov 19, 2008 11:50 PM GMT
    Pedrosxxx saidI don't think that is true at all. It is way more painful to fall in love with a straight guy than to risk going out with some gay you're not even attracted to.


    1) Why would you go out with a guy you are not attracted to?
    2) Have you been in a relationship? That shit is painful. Way more than maudlin unrequited love.

    And to all the comments about there being no roll in the hay. My statement was dealing with the Platonic straight man form, not the specific one you guys sucked off last weekend in the dressing room of Banana Republic. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 20, 2008 12:01 AM GMT
    Nothing wrong with chasing "straight" guys when they're your type. Nothing ventured nothing gained...
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    Nov 20, 2008 12:06 AM GMT
    RyanReBoRn saidNothing wrong with chasing "straight" guys when they're your type. Nothing ventured nothing gained...


    Of course, if they really are straight, there is nothing to be ventured, since there is nothing to be gained. There is not a chance in hell that anything sexual will happen, if they really are straight.

    If they are really closeted gays, masquarading as straight, or if they are BI, and claim they are straight, then there is something to be gained, so something to be ventured.

    Let's keep our terms "straight". icon_razz.gif
  • Tiran

    Posts: 227

    Nov 20, 2008 12:21 AM GMT
    There is an old adage "you always want what you can not have". Forbidden fruit is the sweetest, and if these men were available they probably wouldn't be (as) desirable.

    Of course tequila means that hope spings eternal lol.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 20, 2008 12:23 AM GMT
    This defies logic! Why would you chase after any guy gay or straight. It's just stupid!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 20, 2008 12:29 AM GMT
    I can understand why. There is this indian guy that comes to my restaurant and he is fucking so hott and everytime i seem him im just like gaaawd damn he is so fucking hottt but i dont chase him..I just think he is super hott and ive noticed he has been becomming a regular at my store..I dont know if he is gay or straight i just know he is nice to look at and if I was single i would most def try to talk to him.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 20, 2008 12:31 AM GMT
    MunchingZombie said
    Pedrosxxx said
    1) Why would you go out with a guy you are not attracted to?
    2) Have you been in a relationship? That shit is painful. Way more than maudlin unrequited love.

    And to all the comments about there being no roll in the hay. My statement was dealing with the Platonic straight man form, not the specific one you guys sucked off last weekend in the dressing room of Banana Republic. icon_biggrin.gif


    My point was that it is NOT "easy" to fall in love with a straight guy. It hurts like hell especially if you spend a lot of time around them.

    Relationship are definitely good at pulling the ol' heart strings too though. Yes, I would know because I have been in relationships thank you very much.
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    Nov 20, 2008 12:33 AM GMT
    fastprof saidI don't think that there is an epidemic.

    There are 10s of thousands of guys on RJ. Some are newbies to the gay world, and those are the most likely to post about something like that. Any guy that is settled in gay life, does not have self-hate, and is clear on setting goals to aspire to find guys who are attainable (meaning, gay), wouldn't post such a thread.




    It is so annoying when people act superior on these threads. Geez relax buddy.