Something About Myself That Really Bothers Me

  • Joeyphx444

    Posts: 2382

    Sep 04, 2013 3:32 AM GMT
    I messaged a guy on Scruff (yah, yah I know :p) and he messaged me back and we have been talking for a week now. He is great and we have A LOT in common. We've txted and talked on the phone a few times as well. He is from Vegas and moved here but I think he is going back to Vegas soon. He just got out of a 13 year relationship so we expressed that we are just friends for now and I am OK with that.

    The problem I am having is this: We have been txting/talking on phone everyday since last week. This weekend, his family came in to visit from out of state (his Grandma lives in AZ). So the texts/talk have been kinda intermittent since Sunday. I understand all that but for some reason I have been worried about this indeterminacy. We tentatively planned to meet this Wednesday and I texted him today (Tuesday) to check in and tell him the plans. He only texted me today in the morning in response to a text I sent the night before. I understand he is probably busy with his family but another part of me is worried. Is this logical? I feel like it's not because I shouldn't be this concerned. My other friends sometimes never respond to certain things and it's never bothered me. icon_evil.gificon_evil.gif

    I guess we just connected so much and I wanna meet him b4 he goes back to Vegas. I have not texted him at all since this morning cuz I am trying to give him some space, but how much is too much?
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Sep 04, 2013 3:36 AM GMT
    Now now.. don't jump the gun. You don't want to come off overly attached or needy. You are doing the right thing by giving him space.

    Also I've learned to grow a thick skin when dabbling with those apps. One moment you can be chatting up a guy thinking it's going great, the next moment you never hear from him again.. without any explanation.


    Edit: 4000 posts wooo
  • Joeyphx444

    Posts: 2382

    Sep 04, 2013 3:48 AM GMT
    TheBizMan saidNow now.. don't jump the gun. You don't want to come off overly attached or needy. You are doing the right thing by giving him space.

    Also I've learned to grow a thick skin when dabbling with those apps. One moment you can be chatting up a guy thinking it's going great, the next moment you never hear from him again.. without any explanation.


    Edit: 4000 posts wooo


    I think I need to go thru a relationship to get passed all these feelings. I think once I have one and get dumped or dump someone or even be in a good LTR, maybe I'll be more laid-back or worn in? lol I don't know the correct wordage

    Real f'd up way of looking at it I know icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 04, 2013 5:15 AM GMT
    TheBizMan saidNow now.. don't jump the gun. You don't want to come off overly attached or needy. You are doing the right thing by giving him space.

    Also I've learned to grow a thick skin when dabbling with those apps. One moment you can be chatting up a guy thinking it's going great, the next moment you never hear from him again.. without any explanation.


    Edit: 4000 posts wooo


    Yess!!! Talked to this HOT Local guy on a site... for weeks, everyday and night.. then I ask to meet up and he was like.. lets take it slower.. SLOWER! You can't go any slower than I can yet there is a problem.. then he just ignores me

    Saw him on another site and he says he doesn't even remember me, tried talking with him again Twice and he says 1 thing then then ignores me.. said he wanted to be a future cop, So Hawt!! and seemingly nice...

    Im sad icon_cry.gif

    Ugh!.. so sad

  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Sep 04, 2013 5:21 AM GMT
    you connected to text .... stop it
    What you see in text is not what you get in real life
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 04, 2013 5:26 AM GMT
    Calm down dude. It's not that serious. If this is how you are acting before you even met I can't imagine how you will be after ya'll do...
  • Joeyphx444

    Posts: 2382

    Sep 04, 2013 6:01 AM GMT
    Thanks reluctant, I don't know why I get so wrapped up in this. I try to keep talking to other guys and it helps a little along with keeping busy myself. Like I said in the topic title, I recognize this as a problem and I am trying to work on it. I just gotta keep thinking that f it was meant to be, It'll be
  • Joeyphx444

    Posts: 2382

    Sep 04, 2013 6:10 AM GMT
    ReluctantPromises said
    Joeyphx444 saidThanks reluctant, I don't know why I get so wrapped up in this. I try to keep talking to other guys and it helps a little along with keeping busy myself. Like I said in the topic title, I recognize this as a problem and I am trying to work on it. I just gotta keep thinking that f it was meant to be, It'll be


    Well the trick is not to get attached. Think of it as visiting a pet store. You get to play with a puppy, you may even come back everyday to play with said puppy but that puppy is not your dog. You're just testing him out and even if you really want him you know someone else wants him just as much as you do so there's no point in getting overly attached.



    well that's easier said than done of course lol
    if I let myself, I can be easily attached
  • Joeyphx444

    Posts: 2382

    Sep 04, 2013 6:39 AM GMT
    ReluctantPromises said
    Joeyphx444 said
    ReluctantPromises said
    Joeyphx444 saidThanks reluctant, I don't know why I get so wrapped up in this. I try to keep talking to other guys and it helps a little along with keeping busy myself. Like I said in the topic title, I recognize this as a problem and I am trying to work on it. I just gotta keep thinking that f it was meant to be, It'll be


    Well the trick is not to get attached. Think of it as visiting a pet store. You get to play with a puppy, you may even come back everyday to play with said puppy but that puppy is not your dog. You're just testing him out and even if you really want him you know someone else wants him just as much as you do so there's no point in getting overly attached.



    well that's easier said than done of course lol
    if I let myself, I can be easily attached


    But you already know exactly how it's going to end though so why set yourself up like that? Getting attached so much is probably a symptom of something else. Maybe you're longing for something else unrelated to romance this is your way of filling a void and when this filler refuses to play his role you get upset because you were expecting some of relief to whatever it is you feel like you are lacking.

    But that's just a theory. In any case it's never good to get attached to a guy you're officially being a boyfriend with. Sure get to know them and appreciate them but broach things very carefully.


    I could probably guess or pinpoint some reasons behind it but this is not the place really for that lol

    I do know how exactly it can end up and I am afraid of that and another part of me wants it to work out and I guess that internal fighting leads to all this anxiety and stuff