Would you be annoyed being in a city where most of your ethnicity are mainly seen dating inter-racially?

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    Sep 09, 2013 4:48 AM GMT
    So I was out at the club last night, doing my nightly survey of the (long overdue for a move) 'scene' out here in Denver. And I noticed something peculiar that I'm sure I've noticed 1,000 times...but only now am I now annoyed. But every Black dude except for myself (I was with my Black friend who is 'married' to a White guy) was with someone other than another brutha. Like, WITH, with. Either dancing up on or kissing etc. I seen a brutha with a Mexican, White dude, and an Asian...but not with another Black dude. Granted, it was one of the so-called 'circuit' venues and that's kinda common across the country.

    Now, I don't want to get anyone's tank top in a knot. I want people to understand why I am annoyed about it. As someone like myself who does date inter-racially, this is nothing to do with people sticking to their own race. But it's like, what the fuck? As a Black person, what the fuck kind of message is being sent out to other races when they never see us together? A hint, not a very good one.

    When I lived in Tampa, Florida...which was basically the city I grew up in and spent 5 years in the gay scene, I didn't have the same issues. You had your bruthas that dated interracially yes, but it was on such a small scale that I didn't even notice.

    However, dating inter-racially here, alot of these guys claim to not have hardly any experience dating Bruthas. So, you have a city that is majority White and Latino, yet you have a tiny segment that is actually remotely interested in getting with a nigga. Yet, the bruthas who are after them outweigh the ones who are actually interested!

    So you have this fucked up dynamic where the non-Black guys who are into bruthas, get the abundance...yet as a brutha dating interracial, you feel like you're in a rat race and always disposable. Because these cr@ckers and sp!cs have ni**as at their disposal. (sorry just speaking old school southern dialect. I do not condone that language in public.) icon_neutral.gif

    It's like man, I can't do this. I want to be able to date interracial because of choice, not to look like everyone else. I am fully comfortable with my choice because I've dated Black, White and Latino EQUALLY in all of 12 years, but I've always had the strongest preference for Latinos and see myself with one eventually. My 1st sexual encounter was Black, my 2nd was Puerto Rican. I alternated back and forth between the races until I felt a stronger attraction to Latino. No particular reason, it just happened that way. Neither was better or worse.

    I also noticed this on a larger scale in Minneapolis, and decided not to move there because of it. I like things to be a little more leveled out. Like for the Hispanics here, how would feel seeing ALL the few Hispanics in a city dating only Black or White people? Weird huh? And I know how Latino people are about these things. I thought I was off to a great start with this Mexican guy couple weeks ago, until he introduced me to his mom and sister icon_cry.gif
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    Sep 09, 2013 4:52 AM GMT
    No, I wouldn't be annoyed because i don't think that matters.
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    Sep 09, 2013 5:07 AM GMT
    ReluctantPromises saidWell have you thought about maybe many of them couldn't find black men who were interested in other black men?


    Oh yeah, I learned that lesson within 3 months of being here. Went to chat with a brutha at the same club I am speaking of...and he says, "hey, I want to get with your friend over there"

    My friend was White. And he was also supposed to be my date that night, until he started treating me like a fucking disposable ass nigga...by bringing some other nigga in my face he just met that night. That's the shit I'm talking about.

    Dating interracially here, you get no respect. Because these niggas don't respect each other, so how the fuck are any of these other guys going to? You'd be very mislead to believe that just because you see alot of interracial stuff here, that it's somehow 'easier'. And White people think that. It's not actually. It's different when you're the minority.
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    Sep 09, 2013 5:12 AM GMT
    This thread is DUMB AS FUCK.......

    So what.. you expect people to change the love of their life for someone who is of their own color?

    Don't answer that because that is what the hell you are saying... and your "answer" will take us nowhere. People don't fall in love for being a "good" example for the rest of the world.. it happens naturally


    Once again.. DUMB AS FUCK! icon_confused.gif

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    Sep 09, 2013 5:15 AM GMT
    And STOP saying "nigga"

    You sound Damn Ignorant! icon_mad.gif

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    Yes I Said It Twice!
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    Sep 09, 2013 5:18 AM GMT
    ReluctantPromises said

    Are you going to move back to Florida?

    You don't have the same problem in South Florida do you?


    I'm actually thinking about moving out of the country as a foreign exchange student. On a serious note, I'm considering the northeast. I talk about Florida only to explain the differences of how I grew up versus what I'm currently dealing with. Not that I want to move back there.

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    Sep 09, 2013 5:18 AM GMT
    gta5iscomingin9days saidno because i'm colorblind. you get with someone because you like them for who they are. nevermind everything else such as their skin color, where they're from, and blah blah hoorah or whatever the fuck.


    +1 I gotta agree with P Dizzle here on this one.
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    Sep 09, 2013 5:25 AM GMT
    Are you saying that you're annoyed by guys who date inter-racially, and you yourself are an inter-racial dater?
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    Sep 09, 2013 5:44 AM GMT
    I remember seeing some studies saying that blacks men don't date black women. That shows that there's conflict between the two genders. Maybe that they're unhappy with themselves? I'm not too sure.
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    Sep 09, 2013 5:46 AM GMT
    Neight saidAre you saying that you're annoyed by guys who date inter-racially, and you yourself are an inter-racial dater?


    No...I'm saying I don't like to see an entire minority in a city, going after the majority. It doesn't send a good message. It says, "Black guys aren't even worth dating by their own race". And they don't treat us with respect.

    How is it that I can go to Washington DC and see White couples everywhere in Dupont Circle, a city that is predominately Black...and yet in Denver you don't see most of 'us' together?

    There's no balance to it. There needs to be a balance. I really don't know why some guys date interracial nor am I knocking them for it. But...I question the motives of some of them.
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    Sep 09, 2013 6:00 AM GMT
    Wasn't your last thread about the same thing? Geez.
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    Sep 09, 2013 6:25 AM GMT
    ReluctantPromises said
    Slim2010 saidWasn't your last thread about the same thing? Geez.


    Yes it was and the one before that and the one before.

    He's more repetitive than Taylor Swift.


    Mmhmm, thought so.
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    Sep 09, 2013 7:29 AM GMT
    You don't want guys to be happy and in love if it means that you're the rule and not the exception.


    Please seek therapy.
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    Sep 09, 2013 7:58 AM GMT
    Well interesting thread, No I wouldn't be annoyed if my gays/same race guys date other guys. I wouldn't really care really unless if he's dating me or sucking my cock and date other guys! hahaha, strong language. OP, I think you should move to the LA region since you like Latinos so much. There are alot of gay hot Latin guys here for you to choose from. I've seen Black men with Latino, Asian and White men here often. Aside from this, I'd say just focus on yourself and be happy dating whoever and don't be so upset or annoyed at what other gays are doing! because it's sort of none of your business who they're fucking, harsh truth.

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    Sep 09, 2013 11:42 AM GMT
    This is really stupid, why do you care so much? Get on with your own life, I don't see what you have a problem with.
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    Sep 09, 2013 12:23 PM GMT
    Slim2010 saidNo, I wouldn't be annoyed because i don't think that matters.


    yeah, I feel the same way. Then again, being white to begin with (in a majority population), I don't think I've ever been in a situation where almost all of the white guys were with a different race. I think that would be kinda rare.
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    Sep 09, 2013 3:58 PM GMT
    FuzzyPecs25 saidSo I was out at the club last night, doing my nightly survey of the (long overdue for a move) 'scene' out here in Denver. And I noticed something peculiar that I'm sure I've noticed 1,000 times...but only now am I now annoyed. But every Black dude except for myself (I was with my Black friend who is 'married' to a White guy) was with someone other than another brutha. Like, WITH, with. Either dancing up on or kissing etc. I seen a brutha with a Mexican, White dude, and an Asian...but not with another Black dude. Granted, it was one of the so-called 'circuit' venues and that's kinda common across the country.

    Now, I don't want to get anyone's tank top in a knot. I want people to understand why I am annoyed about it. As someone like myself who does date inter-racially, this is nothing to do with people sticking to their own race. But it's like, what the fuck? As a Black person, what the fuck kind of message is being sent out to other races when they never see us together? A hint, not a very good one.

    When I lived in Tampa, Florida...which was basically the city I grew up in and spent 5 years in the gay scene, I didn't have the same issues. You had your bruthas that dated interracially yes, but it was on such a small scale that I didn't even notice.

    However, dating inter-racially here, alot of these guys claim to not have hardly any experience dating Bruthas. So, you have a city that is majority White and Latino, yet you have a tiny segment that is actually remotely interested in getting with a nigga. Yet, the bruthas who are after them outweigh the ones who are actually interested!

    So you have this fucked up dynamic where the non-Black guys who are into bruthas, get the abundance...yet as a brutha dating interracial, you feel like you're in a rat race and always disposable. Because these cr@ckers and sp!cs have ni**as at their disposal. (sorry just speaking old school southern dialect. I do not condone that language in public.) icon_neutral.gif

    It's like man, I can't do this. I want to be able to date interracial because of choice, not to look like everyone else. I am fully comfortable with my choice because I've dated Black, White and Latino EQUALLY in all of 12 years, but I've always had the strongest preference for Latinos and see myself with one eventually. My 1st sexual encounter was Black, my 2nd was Puerto Rican. I alternated back and forth between the races until I felt a stronger attraction to Latino. No particular reason, it just happened that way. Neither was better or worse.

    I also noticed this on a larger scale in Minneapolis, and decided not to move there because of it. I like things to be a little more leveled out. Like for the Hispanics here, how would feel seeing ALL the few Hispanics in a city dating only Black or White people? Weird huh? And I know how Latino people are about these things. I thought I was off to a great start with this Mexican guy couple weeks ago, until he introduced me to his mom and sister icon_cry.gif


    I can't help but roll my eyes when I see this. . . I could never take someone who talks like this seriously.... as an equal to me. it sounds so ignorant and stupid when blk ppl refer to themselves as "nigga"...

    Like, we get it....you're black and u have ur own unique culture, etc..., but stop referring to yourself as "nigga." It's really unnecessary. U sound uneducated, therefore eliminating a large potential dating constituent for yourself. No one likes someone that sounds dumb. It's not a desireable trait.
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    Sep 09, 2013 4:06 PM GMT
    Dumb topic. You make it seem like bargain hunting: "n-word at their disposal."



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    Sep 10, 2013 2:34 AM GMT
    This is dumb, man. People will date who they want to date. Yeah, a lot of Hispanics where I am from look for the ideal white man or woman as if they are some kind of holy grail or whatever. Am I bothered by it? Nah, it is their choice. In the end, the only thing that matters is the mutual attraction and love.
  • TheBizMan

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    Sep 10, 2013 2:55 AM GMT
    What the fuck are you even trying to say dude. Your whole OP is full of contradictions.
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    Sep 10, 2013 3:25 AM GMT
    Why must you use the word "nigga"? You don't sound very intelligent....icon_neutral.gif

    Edit: And I posted this without looking at the other responses. Glad to see I'm not alone. You aren't doing yourself or the black community any favors with the way you talk. Just...stop....
  • Generaleclect...

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    Sep 10, 2013 3:53 AM GMT
    This guy's endless stream of negativity makes me sad. icon_sad.gif
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    Sep 10, 2013 4:31 AM GMT
    Why does it matter??? It is sad that in 2013 you're annoyed by this. This is not the 1960s anymore!

    To be honest, I am so glad that I live in an area( SF Bay Area) where there is a lot of diversity. Dating another race actually helped me...you learn a lot about culture that you didn't know before and that is a beautiful thing!!!
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    Sep 10, 2013 5:07 AM GMT
    socalx10 said OP, I think you should move to the LA region since you like Latinos so much. There are alot of gay hot Latin guys here for you to choose from. I'd say just focus on yourself and be happy dating whoever and don't be so upset or annoyed at what other gays are doing! because it's sort of none of your business who they're fucking, harsh truth.


    It is my business because I'm in it. I'm living here, I have to deal with the dating scene, I have to know whether a place is going to be conducive to my goals or are is it going to work against them. When you're in my position, it does matter. And having 50 Black dudes all going for the same 5 White/Latin guys who have a liking for bruthas...is NOT conducive.

    As for the LA suggestion...TBH I'm kind of unsure about ANY of these Western States that have Mexican as the primary Latino makeup. I know it sounds silly, but everything I've experienced having lived in Texas and Colorado...Alot of them just don't seem genuine to me. I've had a number of them play some SERIOUS mind games. They can make it seem like its going somewhere, and then pull the plug out of nowhere. They seem like their with you 1 minute, and then turn the tables real quick the next. I've dated many Mexicans, non of them went far. It's happened that way time and time again. Kinda want to leave the West Coast alone for awhile. Mexicans and Blacks have always had a sort of disconnect anyway. ESPECIALLY, not in Mexifornia.
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    Sep 10, 2013 5:16 AM GMT
    FuzzyPecs25 said
    socalx10 said OP, I think you should move to the LA region since you like Latinos so much. There are alot of gay hot Latin guys here for you to choose from. I'd say just focus on yourself and be happy dating whoever and don't be so upset or annoyed at what other gays are doing! because it's sort of none of your business who they're fucking, harsh truth.


    It is my business because I'm in it. I'm living here, I have to deal with the dating scene, I have to know whether a place is going to be conducive to my goals or are is it going to work against them. When you're in my position, it does matter. And having 50 Black dudes all going for the same 5 White/Latin guys who have a liking for bruthas...is NOT conducive.

    As for the LA suggestion...TBH I'm kind of unsure about ANY of these Western States that have Mexican as the primary Latino makeup. I know it sounds silly, but everything I've experienced having lived in Texas and Colorado...Alot of them just don't seem genuine to me. I've had a number of them play some SERIOUS mind games. They can make it seem like its going somewhere, and then pull the plug out of nowhere. They seem like their with you 1 minute, and then turn the tables real quick the next. I've dated many Mexicans, non of them went far. It's happened that way time and time again. Kinda want to leave the West Coast alone for awhile.


    You can add another Mexican to the list of those that don't like you....