How big is "too big"?

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    Sep 10, 2013 8:25 PM GMT
    I recently started exchanging texts and calls with a total catch of a guy I met online.
    He is a professor and has his PhD in Neurophysiology, straddles the line of ruggedly and boyishly handsome, speaks fluent Italian, has the most context appropriately robust vocabulary that literally gives me butterflies!
    He's attentive enough to make me feel thought of from across the country, self aware enough to apologize when he should, likes sleeping in, animals and cut flowers, is incredibly complimentary, insightful, 2 years out of an LTR but ready for another and he's moving to my city in the next two months.
    He is also a 6'4", 260 lb competitive body builder.
    I've dated tall men before, the last four years of love interests were between 6'2" and 6'8" all skewed towards the beefy. The guy who was 6'8" was 220 at his biggest but because of his height he was very "big" but proportionate.

    This new man is an incredibly sweet Herculean behemoth (all sexual organs operating at full potential) but his arms are bigger than my head! He says that many guys find him "too big" and he's worried I won't like him. I'm sure I will like him fine but I must admit that I'm a little nervous because he is a few inches shy of being a foot taller than me and over 100 lbs heavier.

    I've always liked big beefy men and frequently joke that there are two kinds of people, size queens and liars. To which I get the infrequent protest. My first time nervousness about size got me to to wondering what other peoples' feelings are about size... is there such a thing as "too big"?
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    Sep 10, 2013 9:05 PM GMT
    I don't know... can private parts get too big?
    Elephantitis of the testicles sounds god awful!
  • great_scott

    Posts: 519

    Sep 10, 2013 11:19 PM GMT
    I usually like guys close to my size. There are definitely some hot bodybuilder types, but I think I'd look kinda funny with one.
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    Sep 10, 2013 11:49 PM GMT
    There are some unusually stacked body builders.

    I find radical size differential comforting because I can be a bit rambunctious and I like knowing I don't have to worry about hurting the guy I'm with.
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    Sep 11, 2013 12:14 AM GMT
    EasilyDistracted saidI recently started exchanging texts and calls with a total catch of a guy I met online.
    He is a professor and has his PhD in Neurophysiology, straddles the line of ruggedly and boyishly handsome, speaks fluent Italian, has the most context appropriately robust vocabulary that literally gives me butterflies!
    He's attentive enough to make me feel thought of from across the country, self aware enough to apologize when he should, likes sleeping in, animals and cut flowers, is incredibly complimentary, insightful, 2 years out of an LTR but ready for another and he's moving to my city in the next two months.
    He is also a 6'4", 260 lb competitive body builder.
    I've dated tall men before, the last four years of love interests were between 6'2" and 6'8" all skewed towards the beefy. The guy who was 6'8" was 220 at his biggest but because of his height he was very "big" but proportionate.

    This new man is an incredibly sweet Herculean behemoth (all sexual organs operating at full potential) but his arms are bigger than my head! He says that many guys find him "too big" and he's worried I won't like him. I'm sure I will like him fine but I must admit that I'm a little nervous because he is a few inches shy of being a foot taller than me and over 100 lbs heavier.

    I've always liked big beefy men and frequently joke that there are two kinds of people, size queens and liars. To which I get the infrequent protest. My first time nervousness about size got me to to wondering what other peoples' feelings are about size... is there such a thing as "too big"?


    Relevant portion highlit in red. We've all been seduced by well educated, charismatic, tall, hung competitive bodybuilders "too big" for most gay guys (?) but they're never local and, despite protestations to the contrary, never visit, much less relocate. Maybe you'll be the exception - I'm keeping this thread on my radar!
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    Sep 11, 2013 12:24 AM GMT
    You seem to really like him from what you described...

    I wouldn't let size be a factor. Like this guy for who he is before you knew about his size. I actually find it comforting if he is huge bodybuilder, that makes for some very good cuddling, lolicon_smile.gif
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    Sep 11, 2013 8:16 AM GMT
    "Likes sleeping in, animals, and cut flowers." Wow, that's deep. icon_rolleyes.gif

    Today's "stacked" bodybuilder is tomorrow's fat sack o' shit with moobs drooping halfway to the waist. And the risk of diabetes and heart disease is way up there. So ya better love him for what's inside.

    Lean is keen! But I don't discriminate much size-wise (either in terms of physical build or the "fruit bowl.") That having been written, I draw the line at somebody whose weight is freakishly out of proportion with their height and frame. Under 5'10" but over 225 lbs? Pass.
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    Sep 11, 2013 8:47 AM GMT
    Have you actually seen what this guy looks like via Skype or FaceTime? I think proof is needed if he claims he's too big and it'll give you a physical perspective on his size. But to answer your question and this is strictly based on my experience, yes there is such a thing as too big.

    I dated a 6'6, 230 lbs guy who was into guys way shorter than him. This guy was big everywhere including his private parts and he was definitely a sweet guy, very gentle too. But our height comparison was odd to me and it just didn't feel right. We ended the relationship because he was moving to Atlanta for med school and I made a decision to date guys close to my height range (less than 6 feet).
  • BloodFlame

    Posts: 1768

    Sep 11, 2013 8:58 AM GMT
    He seems like a nice and thoughtful guy. I mean, definitely a rare gem. Why not just give it a shot? See how it's like with him and how you feel. If it doesn't work out, at least you'll have experience and know what you'd want in the next guy.

    Me personally, I do think there is a thing as too big but I'm pretty flexible. You see, I love size difference. I like being the small guy to the big guy. Bodybuilders who actually like small/lean guys are definitely a type of guy I like (I'm a big fan of the off season look lol). However, if the guy is too huge via, Hulk status (kind of an exaggeration but you know what I mean), then that's where I draw the line.

    But anyway, why not meet him? Everyone deserves a chance don't you think? icon_smile.gif
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    Sep 11, 2013 9:02 PM GMT
    eagermuscle saidRelevant portion highlit in red. We've all been seduced by well educated, charismatic, tall, hung competitive bodybuilders "too big" for most gay guys (?) but they're never local and, despite protestations to the contrary, never visit, much less relocate. Maybe you'll be the exception - I'm keeping this thread on my radar!


    A very good point indeed. He actually accepted a academic position at the hospital I work at... I have suspicions despite the phone calls, emails and texts.
    I'll keep you posted on how it progresses. icon_smile.gif
    Thanks for keeping me in check.
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    Sep 11, 2013 9:04 PM GMT
    MikkyB saidYou seem to really like him from what you described...

    I wouldn't let size be a factor. Like this guy for who he is before you knew about his size. I actually find it comforting if he is huge bodybuilder, that makes for some very good cuddling, lolicon_smile.gif
    I like the "idea of him". Until his beefy self is in front of me, it's all a romance novel.
    I'm not going to let size deter me if all pans out well... however I did read a good point about "moobs" that I still have to get to.
    ...that one got me to thinking... "ruh roh"
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    Sep 11, 2013 9:06 PM GMT
    okonomiyaki said"Likes sleeping in, animals, and cut flowers." Wow, that's deep. icon_rolleyes.gif

    Today's "stacked" bodybuilder is tomorrow's fat sack o' shit with moobs drooping halfway to the waist. And the risk of diabetes and heart disease is way up there. So ya better love him for what's inside.

    Lean is keen! But I don't discriminate much size-wise (either in terms of physical build or the "fruit bowl.") That having been written, I draw the line at somebody whose weight is freakishly out of proportion with their height and frame. Under 5'10" but over 225 lbs? Pass.
    I'm as deep as a gutter puddle what can I say. ;)
    your point about moobs and diabetes are well taken.
    thanks!
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    Sep 11, 2013 9:10 PM GMT
    Erik101 saidHave you actually seen what this guy looks like via Skype or FaceTime? I think proof is needed if he claims he's too big and it'll give you a physical perspective on his size.
    You're brilliant! A most excellent idea! Thanks!


    Nirvana_Fan1991 saidHe seems like a nice and thoughtful guy. I mean, definitely a rare gem. Why not just give it a shot? See how it's like with him and how you feel. If it doesn't work out, at least you'll have experience and know what you'd want in the next guy.

    Me personally, I do think there is a thing as too big but I'm pretty flexible. You see, I love size difference. I like being the small guy to the big guy. Bodybuilders who actually like small/lean guys are definitely a type of guy I like (I'm a big fan of the off season look lol). However, if the guy is too huge via, Hulk status (kind of an exaggeration but you know what I mean), then that's where I draw the line.

    But anyway, why not meet him? Everyone deserves a chance don't you think? icon_smile.gif
    I always say that I'm 6'5" on the inside and it takes a lot of man to keep my company. I gravitate towards the Venti size men. Will see how it all pans out and keep you posted. Thank you for the feedback!
  • rnch

    Posts: 11525

    Sep 11, 2013 9:59 PM GMT
    EasilyDistracted saidI recently started exchanging texts and calls with a total catch of a guy I met online.
    He is a professor and has his PhD in Neurophysiology, straddles the line of ruggedly and boyishly handsome, speaks fluent Italian, has the most context appropriately robust vocabulary that literally gives me butterflies!
    He's attentive enough to make me feel thought of from across the country, self aware enough to apologize when he should, likes sleeping in, animals and cut flowers, is incredibly complimentary, insightful, 2 years out of an LTR but ready for another and he's moving to my city in the next two months.
    He is also a 6'4", 260 lb competitive body builder.
    I've dated tall men before, the last four years of love interests were between 6'2" and 6'8" all skewed towards the beefy. The guy who was 6'8" was 220 at his biggest but because of his height he was very "big" but proportionate.

    This new man is an incredibly sweet Herculean behemoth (all sexual organs operating at full potential) but his arms are bigger than my head! He says that many guys find him "too big" and he's worried I won't like him. I'm sure I will like him fine but I must admit that I'm a little nervous because he is a few inches shy of being a foot taller than me and over 100 lbs heavier.

    I've always liked big beefy men and frequently joke that there are two kinds of people, size queens and liars. To which I get the infrequent protest. My first time nervousness about size got me to to wondering what other peoples' feelings are about size... is there such a thing as "too big"?




    A man described like this one is a "keeper", no matter what size his outer shell is.

    If he is "too big" for you, please send him to me in New Orleans!


    icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 12, 2013 3:42 PM GMT
    I admire tall, beefy guys, but i'm more attracted to guys that are smaller than me.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 12, 2013 3:58 PM GMT
    sounds like you will make the cutest couple. I hope he is a bottom..LOL. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 12, 2013 6:33 PM GMT
    My answer is directly correlated to my amount of jealousy.

    --Can't even be happy for you, because I hate you so much.