My First Time...

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    Nov 21, 2008 5:04 AM GMT
    Tonight I went to a gay bar for the first time. It's a funny little story because I got lost on my there because I don't really go into Manhattan for a lot of things. The bar is called The Hangar; I thought it would be a good place to start because I read a lot of good reviews from it and it has a mixed crowd.

    I was disappointed because I didn't meet anyone I really clicked with, the bar was really crowded, and the bar wasn't well-lit. The bar was so crowded I got my drinks from the bar across the street called Ty's. I should have read the sign outside that said "Two-for-One drinks tonight". I didn't even know what kind of drink to buy lol so I settled for a Bud Light beer and got a little tipsy because I didn't eat anything beforehand.icon_redface.gificon_lol.gif


    What's was your first experience at a gay bar if you've been to one?

    Also, I wonder in your experience do you know for gay bars to have a different atmosphere during daylight hours as opposed to night hours?
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    Nov 21, 2008 5:30 AM GMT


    Hey, you'll have to sample a few to find one that feels good.

    First time, eh? The first time I went to a gay bar there were close to three hundred people in it. I spent a couple of hours there and when I left I was walking on air. My friend who had gone with me looked completely blank when I proudly stated I had spotted at least 6 gay people. He said,

    "Doug that was a men only bar and they were ALL GAY."
    Hah! It took an hour or so for it to sink in.

    I used to like what they called tea dances on Saturday afternoons.
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    Nov 21, 2008 2:43 PM GMT
    My first trip to a gay bar was at a country western bar in DC called Remingtons. I went with one of my really good friends so i always had someone to hang with. I met all of his friends there and made several new friends. I did'nt pick anybody up (but i wasn't necessarily trying to). I had a great time, learned some new dances, but most importantly i got to spend quality time with a really good friend.
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    Nov 21, 2008 2:52 PM GMT
    Gay bars can be figuratively like night & day, between night & day. Older regulars by day who all know each other and socialize, younger & louder at night while they cruise.

    My first gay bar was in Seattle, a bit into the leather scene, with motorcycles inside for decoration, just my kinda place, called "The Cuff." My gay "mentor" brought me there, it was crowded and I actually got weak-kneed from the rush of all that man scent. I've loved gay bars ever since.

    What other bars have you tried in Manhattan? I like the Monster near the Stonewall, and the Eagle can be fun, if you like hairy men in leather. The Townhouse on the East Side is a very elegant piano bar/club, but I'd recommend going with someone until you become a regular, otherwise you might feel left out. Those rich boys can be rather stand-offish, with their limousines waiting outside, and their bodyguards hovering in the background.
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    Nov 21, 2008 3:54 PM GMT
    Red_Vespa saidGay bars can be figuratively like night & day, between night & day. Older regulars by day who all know each other and socialize, younger & louder at night while they cruise.

    My first gay bar was in Seattle, a bit into the leather scene, with motorcycles inside for decoration, just my kinda place, called "The Cuff." My gay "mentor" brought me there, it was crowded and I actually got weak-kneed from the rush of all that man scent. I've loved gay bars ever since.

    What other bars have you tried in Manhattan? I like the Monster near the Stonewall, and the Eagle can be fun, if you like hairy men in leather. The Townhouse on the East Side is a very elegant piano bar/club, but I'd recommend going with someone until you become a regular, otherwise you might feel left out. Those rich boys can be rather stand-offish, with their limousines waiting outside, and their bodyguards hovering in the background.


    Seriously this kid is 21 and your telling him to go to the townhouse?? do you think hes a prostitute? I hate to say it but if your under 50 and going to the townhouse your are likely being paid by the person you leave with. they don't even try to hide it.

    Monster and Eagle, for a 21 year old who has never been to a gay bar are also not likely good suggestions. Based on his demographc he would likely just be ignored at the eagle, and well the monster is just pretty much an older person bar.

    Seriously kid try Vlada, the ritz, therapy, or HK all of which are in hells kitchen. If you want to stay further downtown you could hit up G Lounge which has a very mixed crowd, or Baracuda.
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    Nov 21, 2008 4:38 PM GMT
    My first time..hmm?

    It was when I was living in Spain, I was drinking with some straight friends and got pissed with one of them so I left. I had only been pass the gay bar once but somehow I found it even though I was pretty drunk. I met this guy and we ended up dancing and making out until dawn(that's how you party in Spain though, you go home when the sun comes out). We kind of dated for a bit but he broke it off because he knew I was leaving soon and didn't want his heart broken.
  • DJZ77

    Posts: 381

    Nov 21, 2008 4:53 PM GMT
    WOAH!!! icon_eek.gif Hold up there Red Vespa... I agree with Chungo on the choice of bars. The Eagle is so not a place to go when you are just venturing out for the first time, no place for newbies.

    tryingtolive: First off... do you have any gay friends? I ask because it makes the bar scene a whole lot better if you are with friends. Once you're comfortable and used to the environment, you can check them out on your own (Although you've already done this so... Kudos). Second, what are you into? The gay scene in NY is so diverse, you've got a lot to choose from. You've got the West Village, East Village, Chelsea, Hell's Kitchen, The upper east side, and then some outside of the city in Brooklyn and Queens.

    Being that you're young, I think you might like the crowd in either the East Village or Chelsea best. I know a few of the bar/clubs have college night themes, which can be fun... (ohhhhhh the memories). Definitely check out HX.com or Nextmagazine.com and do a search on the bars, you're bound to find something that may interest you.

    Good luck and Cheers!
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    Nov 21, 2008 5:01 PM GMT
    I would have to agree with Chungo on this one. He seems to know his bars...

    chungo44 said
    Red_Vespa saidGay bars can be figuratively like night & day, between night & day. Older regulars by day who all know each other and socialize, younger & louder at night while they cruise.

    My first gay bar was in Seattle, a bit into the leather scene, with motorcycles inside for decoration, just my kinda place, called "The Cuff." My gay "mentor" brought me there, it was crowded and I actually got weak-kneed from the rush of all that man scent. I've loved gay bars ever since.

    What other bars have you tried in Manhattan? I like the Monster near the Stonewall, and the Eagle can be fun, if you like hairy men in leather. The Townhouse on the East Side is a very elegant piano bar/club, but I'd recommend going with someone until you become a regular, otherwise you might feel left out. Those rich boys can be rather stand-offish, with their limousines waiting outside, and their bodyguards hovering in the background.


    Seriously this kid is 21 and your telling him to go to the townhouse?? do you think hes a prostitute? I hate to say it but if your under 50 and going to the townhouse your are likely being paid by the person you leave with. they don't even try to hide it.

    Monster and Eagle, for a 21 year old who has never been to a gay bar are also not likely good suggestions. Based on his demographc he would likely just be ignored at the eagle, and well the monster is just pretty much an older person bar.

    Seriously kid try Vlada, the ritz, therapy, or HK all of which are in hells kitchen. If you want to stay further downtown you could hit up G Lounge which has a very mixed crowd, or Baracuda.
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    Nov 21, 2008 5:56 PM GMT
    Although not a NY native, I have to agree with Chungo44 and the others on what they said. The kid would probably be more comfortable at one of the younger oriented clubs.

    I disagree about the Townhouse. I think its just sour grapes from someone who didn't feel like they fit in. I have been there many times for a late night drink and some music after a show or dinner with friends. Its a nice place with a relaxed atmosphere (and one of those cars waiting outside could very well have been mine). I will admit that there are a large number of wealthy older men with their young escorts in tow however. If you don't have immediate entree though, then the lines out front look like they could be long on the weekends. The place is un pretentious, yet a little upscale, and does cater to the over 40 set. It's not so much a dance club or bar as it is a cocktail lounge.

    Probably not the place for the average 21 year old though.



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    Nov 21, 2008 6:42 PM GMT
    chungo44 said
    Red_Vespa saidGay bars can be figuratively like night & day, between night & day. Older regulars by day who all know each other and socialize, younger & louder at night while they cruise.

    My first gay bar was in Seattle, a bit into the leather scene, with motorcycles inside for decoration, just my kinda place, called "The Cuff." My gay "mentor" brought me there, it was crowded and I actually got weak-kneed from the rush of all that man scent. I've loved gay bars ever since.

    What other bars have you tried in Manhattan? I like the Monster near the Stonewall, and the Eagle can be fun, if you like hairy men in leather. The Townhouse on the East Side is a very elegant piano bar/club, but I'd recommend going with someone until you become a regular, otherwise you might feel left out. Those rich boys can be rather stand-offish, with their limousines waiting outside, and their bodyguards hovering in the background.


    Seriously this kid is 21 and your telling him to go to the townhouse?? do you think hes a prostitute? I hate to say it but if your under 50 and going to the townhouse your are likely being paid by the person you leave with. they don't even try to hide it.

    Monster and Eagle, for a 21 year old who has never been to a gay bar are also not likely good suggestions. Based on his demographc he would likely just be ignored at the eagle, and well the monster is just pretty much an older person bar.

    Seriously kid try Vlada, the ritz, therapy, or HK all of which are in hells kitchen. If you want to stay further downtown you could hit up G Lounge which has a very mixed crowd, or Baracuda.
    Thanks for the heads up chungo. Are the clubs you mentioned better if I went with friends or can I wing it alone?
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    Nov 21, 2008 6:48 PM GMT
    Devilboy77 saidWOAH!!! icon_eek.gif Hold up there Red Vespa... I agree with Chungo on the choice of bars. The Eagle is so not a place to go when you are just venturing out for the first time, no place for newbies.

    tryingtolive: First off... do you have any gay friends? I ask because it makes the bar scene a whole lot better if you are with friends. Once you're comfortable and used to the environment, you can check them out on your own (Although you've already done this so... Kudos). Second, what are you into? The gay scene in NY is so diverse, you've got a lot to choose from. You've got the West Village, East Village, Chelsea, Hell's Kitchen, The upper east side, and then some outside of the city in Brooklyn and Queens.

    Being that you're young, I think you might like the crowd in either the East Village or Chelsea best. I know a few of the bar/clubs have college night themes, which can be fun... (ohhhhhh the memories). Definitely check out HX.com or Nextmagazine.com and do a search on the bars, you're bound to find something that may interest you.

    Good luck and Cheers!
    I do have a gay friend who has actually been to the Hangar. He would like to go with me to a gay bar the next time I go. I thought I could handle a place like that alone for the first time, but I guess not. My friend was telling me about this place called Marcos or Macros located at Greenwich Ave and 10th Street, have you ever heard of it?
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    Nov 21, 2008 6:50 PM GMT
    tryingtolive said
    chungo44 said
    Red_Vespa saidGay bars can be figuratively like night & day, between night & day. Older regulars by day who all know each other and socialize, younger & louder at night while they cruise.

    My first gay bar was in Seattle, a bit into the leather scene, with motorcycles inside for decoration, just my kinda place, called "The Cuff." My gay "mentor" brought me there, it was crowded and I actually got weak-kneed from the rush of all that man scent. I've loved gay bars ever since.

    What other bars have you tried in Manhattan? I like the Monster near the Stonewall, and the Eagle can be fun, if you like hairy men in leather. The Townhouse on the East Side is a very elegant piano bar/club, but I'd recommend going with someone until you become a regular, otherwise you might feel left out. Those rich boys can be rather stand-offish, with their limousines waiting outside, and their bodyguards hovering in the background.


    Seriously this kid is 21 and your telling him to go to the townhouse?? do you think hes a prostitute? I hate to say it but if your under 50 and going to the townhouse your are likely being paid by the person you leave with. they don't even try to hide it.

    Monster and Eagle, for a 21 year old who has never been to a gay bar are also not likely good suggestions. Based on his demographc he would likely just be ignored at the eagle, and well the monster is just pretty much an older person bar.

    Seriously kid try Vlada, the ritz, therapy, or HK all of which are in hells kitchen. If you want to stay further downtown you could hit up G Lounge which has a very mixed crowd, or Baracuda.
    Thanks for the heads up chungo. Are the clubs you mentioned better if I went with friends or can I wing it alone? Also, My friend was telling me about this place called Marcos or Macros located at Greenwich Ave and 10th Street, have you ever heard of it?
  • DJZ77

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    Nov 21, 2008 7:35 PM GMT
    tryingtolive said
    My friend was telling me about this place called Marcos or Macros located at Greenwich Ave and 10th Street, have you ever heard of it?


    Sorry, nope... never heard of that one. However, if your friend knows where it's at... go for it!
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    Nov 21, 2008 8:11 PM GMT
    Palikari: Greg you are a dork. You know I know my bars.

    As for Trying to live: I would always suggest to try to go to a bar with friends, it just makes things easier, and more comfortable. you dont feel the need to walk up to random people and you will just be more comfortable especially if you do want to walk up to a random person. As for Marcos I have never heard of that place, but just as a suggestion I would avoid the christopher street bars. they tend to skew to an older crowd, and no offense to anyone who does go to them, would probably not be the most comfortable atmosphere for a 21 year old let alone one going out alone. seriously try G lounge. I think you will like it, a very mixed crowd (especially racially as opposed to some other bars). and No I am not a racist or anything of the sort and that statement is not trying to imply aynthing. I actually love G and go there all the time, I just think you might feel most comfortable in a bar that isnt all white guys, there are a lot of complaints that the gay community is not racially diverse and this bar especially tends to have a very mixed crowd.
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    Nov 21, 2008 8:18 PM GMT
    I'm taking notes for my trip to NYC in january...thanks for the suggestions Chungo...btw, how was your trip to Tucson? Suitably boring, I suppose?
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    Nov 21, 2008 8:21 PM GMT
    My Brother Brought me to a gay bar in Tucson with like 7 of his law school friends hahahahahaha. He took me to IBT's
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    Nov 21, 2008 8:26 PM GMT
    chungo44 saidPalikari: Greg you are a dork. You know I know my bars.


    Chungo: Rob I was agreeing with you but love being called a dork anyways!
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    Nov 21, 2008 8:26 PM GMT
    Ha alright, when I was 18 I went to this place. I was way nervous because I felt way out of place. But I met this dude and I introduced my self as Marc, and he said "Nice to meet you Marc, you can call me dagger" I was so taken off guard that I couldn't even laugh. I almost said, "fine, then you can call me light saber" but yeah that was pretty much it, I got krunk like a gansta for a few songs then called quits. But I'll always remember dagger
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    Nov 21, 2008 8:32 PM GMT
    Palikari: I know you were agreeing with me, and you are still a dork. p.s. dork is a good thing, cause that means you are adorkable which is way better then just plain adorable.
  • sarahtonin

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    Nov 21, 2008 8:33 PM GMT
    Listen to Chungo44 he knows whats up. Don't live there but been to all those and more and they're all great.
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    Nov 21, 2008 9:25 PM GMT
    Duck4life saidMy first trip to a gay bar was at a country western bar in DC called Remingtons. I went with one of my really good friends so i always had someone to hang with. I met all of his friends there and made several new friends. I did'nt pick anybody up (but i wasn't necessarily trying to). I had a great time, learned some new dances, but most importantly i got to spend quality time with a really good friend.


    That's so funny/cute. I've lived in DC for so long and I still have never made a trip out to remingtons.... I dont know about the whole country vibe. Not sure its my thing. Maybe if I had a few margaritas first icon_cool.gif

    My first gay bar experience was a place called "Cobalt" in DC. I was going to meet my friend / a guy who i had a huge crush on. I remember walking in and feeling like everyone was looking at me. I was a nervous wreck on the inside. But as a front I walked in like I owned the place and put on an attitude so that no one would approach me because I would have shat myself if they had... lol... which worked until I relaxed and looked more approachable... and then a sloppy drunk guy approached me and proceeded to accost me on the dance floor.

    Woo. Fun times...... lol.
  • GQjock

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    Nov 21, 2008 10:14 PM GMT
    Jeez... You got me there

    I can't even Remember what my first gay bar experience was

    But I DO remember my first time in Fire Island Pines icon_biggrin.gif

    I couldn't have been more than 11 or 12
    My Dad had a boat and we used to take day trips to Fir Island to the Str8 areas all the time
    One day instead of walking right from the Marina my folks went left
    and we wound up deep into gay territory
    My mother was completely clueless and said this doesn't look like Sailor's Haven
    we passed lots of guys in speedo's and cut offs and boots
    and we didn't turn around until a big lesbian told us that....

    You're in the wrong place...

    But I said to myself ..... No we're NOT icon_wink.gif
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    Nov 21, 2008 10:43 PM GMT
    I watch people come into a gay bar that i go to and it is around 90% couples or groups of friends. That is tough to break into.
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    Nov 21, 2008 10:45 PM GMT
    chungo44 saidMy Brother Brought me to a gay bar in Tucson with like 7 of his law school friends hahahahahaha. He took me to IBT's


    ya, that's about it for tucson.

    on a side note, is your brother hot?
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    Nov 21, 2008 11:16 PM GMT
    I've never been to one on my own. I've always gone with a friend. Do I lead a sheltered life?