The Bible tells us so. !

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    Sep 15, 2013 12:55 AM GMT
    "The Bible tells us so. !
    "Laura Schlessinger is a U.S. radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she told an observant Orthodox Jew that homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned in any circumstance.
    "The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a U.S. resident and posted on the Internet:
    'Dear Dr. Laura:
    'Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.
    'I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other specific laws and how to follow them.
    'a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
    'b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
    'c) I know that we are allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but for some reason, most women get very offended.
    'd) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
    'e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
    'f) Another friend feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev. 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?
    'g) Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room there?
    'h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
    'i) I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may my husband still play touch football if he wears gloves?
    'j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/poly blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them (Lev. 24:10-16)? Couldn't we just burn them with their in-laws (Lev. 20:14)?
    'I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
    'Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.'"
  • Buddha

    Posts: 1767

    Sep 15, 2013 1:20 AM GMT
    Funny, but very old.