Fellow bottoms out there, please help!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2013 9:31 AM GMT
    So I have been seeing this guy for a while now and we have finally decide to consummate our relationship. He's a total dom top which is fine with me as I just want to bottom. The problem is, I have never bottomed and I am very worried I won't be able to handle it and please my boyfriend icon_sad.gif!! I know I am a little tighter than normal and because my bf is quite big Im very anxious.

    So my questions are:

    1. What is the best position to take it?
    2. What can I do to cope with the pain?
    3. How do you guys make sure you're clean before anal?

    He's been really nice and has waited patiently so I really want to make sure this goes well. Im really eager for it!

    Thanks in advance boys!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2013 10:47 AM GMT
    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums?searchtext=bottoming

    ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
    There ya go..
    Don't hurt yourself now.. icon_biggrin.gif

    try1.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2013 5:59 PM GMT
    With what you've got I hope you evolve into "versatile." icon_smile.gif

    That said...deep breaths are your friend. I've gotten some sizable meat missiles worked into me when that was the only way it could've conceivably worked. (As a tall, assertive guy it's usually presumed I'm top/vers to begin with so I haven't run into this issue a whole lot.)

    The pain is there, for sure; how do you think the expression "pain in the ass" originated? (Unlike oral sex, which never causes pain in the neck, it's obvious where it derived from.) Within seconds it starts to fade though. As long as your partner is skilled and patient you'll soon forget what it took for him to bury his bone. Ride 'im cowboy!

    P.S. Go with doggie style. You can always shift your upper anchor point from your hands to your forearms, if you need or prefer to. And if there's a mirror put it in front of you so you can watch your guy bore in and how his expressions change. icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 16, 2013 4:03 AM GMT
    @okonomiyaki

    Yeh although Im short Im masculine and assertive so people often assume the contrary with me icon_smile.gif

    And thanks for your advice icon_smile.gif
  • Gayslut

    Posts: 34

    Sep 16, 2013 1:54 PM GMT
    Ever heard of poppers?

    If not, then assume the bottom on top position. Gives u betta control of how deep u wanna take him in.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 17, 2013 4:56 AM GMT
    Gayslut saidEver heard of poppers?

    If not, then assume the bottom on top position. Gives u betta control of how deep u wanna take him in.


    Yeh I have, are they worth it?

    Umm, I have thought of that, but wouldn't it be harder to take it in that way? What we thought of doing was I getting on a missionary or doggy position and just letting him do it that way it'd be easier for me to relax icon_smile.gif
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    Sep 17, 2013 5:06 AM GMT
    kesky saidSo I have been seeing this guy for a while now and we have finally decide to consummate our relationship. He's a total dom top which is fine with me as I just want to bottom. The problem is, I have never bottomed and I am very worried I won't be able to handle it and please my boyfriend icon_sad.gif!! I know I am a little tighter than normal and because my bf is quite big Im very anxious.

    So my questions are:

    1. What is the best position to take it?
    2. What can I do to cope with the pain?
    3. How do you guys make sure you're clean before anal?

    He's been really nice and has waited patiently so I really want to make sure this goes well. Im really eager for it!

    Thanks in advance boys!


    1. Differs from person to person but I prefer to start out on top riding it so I can go at my own pace and stretch out my hole.

    2. Deep breathing, and preparing yourself such as in step #1. Some guys use dildos before they get fucked but I don't like the way they feel.

    3. Get a shower head attachment that's meant for cleaning out your ass. My friend has one that is long and cylindrical (it's thin) with holes for water to come out at the tip of it. You stick it up your ass and once you feel the pressure of the water building up, remove it and squeeze. You will literally be crapping in the shower but it's like a watery bowel movement so it isn't as bad. Repeat until only water comes out and you will be completely free of feces. Trust me, this grossness is better than your bf pulling out and there being shit on the condom/his dick.

    PS: I have never used poppers nor seen the need to. Just give yourself time in the beginning to get used to the dick and later let him pound you into oblivion. Use lots and lots of lube.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 17, 2013 4:28 PM GMT
    Anocxu saidhttp://www.realjock.com/gayforums?searchtext=bottoming

    ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
    There ya go..
    Don't hurt yourself now.. icon_biggrin.gif

    try1.gif


    Teehee. . . icon_lol.gif

    Plus you are not tighter than any other anal virgin ... icon_confused.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 17, 2013 4:38 PM GMT
    Gayslut saidEver heard of poppers?



    Why on Earth would you recommend snorting video head cleaner to someone? That shit is TOXIC and people get totally addicted to it for sex. If you need chemicals to have sex, you're doing it wrong. At least you got your screen name right.

    Use of Poppers may cause asphyxia, arrhythmias, cardiovascular depression, carbon monoxide poisoning, hepatorenal toxicity, methemoglobinemia, neurologic dysfunction, mucosal, pulmonary, skin irritation and facial dermatitis. With chronic use neurological damage may occur. Alkyl nitrates are immunosuppressive in animal studies and kaposi's sarcoma, a form of cancer has been associated with heavy chronic misuse of alkyl nitrates; laboratory tests have also found evidence of mutagenic effects. Swallowing alkyl nitrates can cause serious acute medical complications and may result in death. Accidental aspiration of amyl or butyl nitrites may lead to the development of lipoid pneumonia. Taking Viagra with nitrites can cause a serious decrease in blood pressure, leading to fainting, stroke, or even heart attack. Poppers can also increase intraocular pressure, resulting in the medical condition glaucoma. Rarely methemoglobinemia and hemolysis may occur especially in individuals predisposed towards such a condition or in overdose. An overdose via drinking poppers may result in cyanosis, unconsciousness, coma and even death. Methemoglobinemia is characterized by cyanosis, shortness of breath, fatigue, altered mental status, coma, and even death.
    Other risks include burns if spilled on skin, loss of consciousness, headaches, and red or itching rashes around the mouth and nose.
    Suggestions of a link between poppers and either AIDS, HIV-infection, or an AIDS-related cancer called Kaposi's Sarcoma have been made and are a subject of on-going debate. Several researchers have demonstrated a statistical correlation between popper use and HHV-8-infection and development of Kaposi's Sarcoma.
    Some health authorities now mandate point of sale warnings.
  • Hothouse

    Posts: 2204

    Sep 17, 2013 5:58 PM GMT
    The guys above have given some good advice.

    Good to clean out prior, but just watch how much water you get in your ass. Use just enough to clean out the immediate area. Too much and you'll cramp up, and that water can work it's way out after you leave the shower. If you're using an attachment in the shower, make sure there's no air in the hose since that will mean air in your ass. You can purchase a cheap enema kit at most drugstores that work pretty well and even prepared enemas and douches will do the job if necessary.

    Relax and use plenty of lube. Enjoy some ass play (rimming, fingers) prior to fucking to relax and warm up your hole.

    It may not seem like it - but riding his cock is the best way to start. You have the control that way and can ease down on it. Let him lay back, get his cock pointed up, and just squat and lower your ass down on his hard cock. After you ride him like this a while, assuming he doesn't cum, and you don't cum, then you can switch it up and try some different positions.

    Once you're used to getting fucked it'll be easier to start off in different positions.

    Yeah, and avoid the poppers. I know some guys say it helps them relax, but as was stated above - they are dangerous and not healthy - and you don't want to start out by creating a dependency on them to have sex. Not good.

    Hey, enjoy getting fucked!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 19, 2013 11:31 AM GMT
    Thanks for the replies boys, i really appreciate it icon_smile.gif

    we have experimented with toys and his fingers before and it was incredibly painful, I am very tight, he reckons way more so than a normal virgin.

    So poppers are no good,, is there anything else that could ease the pain? Would painkillers work at all?

    I just really wanted to please him cos he's been so good and patient until now icon_sad.gif! would suck if i couldn't cope with it.
  • Hothouse

    Posts: 2204

    Sep 19, 2013 2:28 PM GMT
    I wouldn't recommend using pain killers. I'm not sure they'd work, and you don't want to get used to using something like that and end up depending on them to have sex.
    You may just need to take some time to work up to full insertion, full thrusting anal sex.
    If you're that tight, then spend some time each time you have sex with some ass play. Rimming, fingering, toys - use the ass play to allow yourself to become comfortable with having your ass used and opened up.
    I know you're tight, but the sphincter has the ability to open up, you just have to be super relaxed. Usually once opened, cock inserted, it will relax even more, so some initial discomfort would give way to pleasure. Your BF has to take his time and not just shove it in and start plowing. Slow and steady to start.
    You shouldn't endure pain, and if it's continously painful, then you need to stop. You can't just shove something up your ass - that could cause damage. It's very important to be comfortable with your partner, be relaxed and well lubed.
    Do you experience pain when you have a bowel movement? Just wondering, if you do then there may be a medical issue to look at.
    It just takes time for you to understand how your body responds, and for your BF to understand how your body responds. Be patient.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 19, 2013 6:25 PM GMT
    Cleaning up simple. There are devices that attach to tub faucet to douch with.

    As to tight? Try dildos going up in size to accustom that butt hole.
    Still very tight even a my age.

    Talk to your top. If they don't get it, then move on since tops rarely experience the same pain.

    This my sound bizarre, but when I first started having sex, if you have a top that does not rim, preparation H prior helps lube and mask the pain.

    Good luck.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2013 8:59 AM GMT
    @Hothouse

    Nah I don't lol..

    Don't get me wrong, he loves how tight I am, it just worries me a bit bcos hes too big icon_sad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2013 9:10 AM GMT
    kesky said@Hothouse

    Nah I don't lol..

    Don't get me wrong, he loves how tight I am, it just worries me a bit bcos hes too big icon_sad.gif


    No such thing as too big, hes just right.

    Hothouse gave you excellent advice, you'll be fine.

    Enjoy!