"I'm against gay marriage/I don't agree with that lifestyle/tired of the gay agenda being shoved down my throat BUT I'm not a bigot/homophobe/hateful ect..."

  • Guycicle

    Posts: 228

    Oct 04, 2013 9:28 AM GMT
    I see this all the time in forums and on comment sections of articles and I have a hard time wrapping my brain around it. Obviously nobody wants to see themselves as the bad guy.

    I'm just not sure what kind of 'lifestyle' they would agree with for gay people. I'm not even sure why I get annoyed at random people's comments on things, but it still bugs the hell out of me.

    What do you guys think? I'd like to be able to be more understanding of these points of views but I can't help but to think they're just ignorant and/or brainwashed and incapable of empathy. icon_confused.gif
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    Oct 04, 2013 10:00 AM GMT
    Terms like the "gay agenda" tell you they're listening to homophobes, whether from the pulpit, right-wing politicians, or conservative media outlets like Fox News and talk radio. They may not admit to being homophobes themselves, but they're buying into the rhetoric & lies.

    And there's not a lot you can do about it within the forums you describe. Most people like that have already formed their opinions, and go there to express them, not to have them changed. Although sometimes confronting them is worthwhile not to convert them, but to not let their falsehoods go unchallenged for the gullible to read and be wrongly persuaded.

    The best way I know to influence such bigots themselves is through direct social contact, with the example of your own gay life. Doesn't work with everyone, but some will realize the inconsistencies between what they're seeing versus what the right-wingers and religious conservatives are claiming.
  • Apparition

    Posts: 3521

    Oct 04, 2013 10:15 AM GMT
    just reply

    well, it is either let us get married and you never have to deal with us...or risk us becoming your son in law and have to deal with us all the time....and have us pass on our gay genes to your wonderful grandkids ...who will grow up gay and there will be even more of us. now is your chance to stop the gay gene....
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    Oct 04, 2013 10:24 AM GMT
    Apparition saidjust reply

    well, it is either let us get married and you never have to deal with us...or risk us becoming your son in law and have to deal with us all the time....and have us pass on our gay genes to your wonderful grandkids ...who will grow up gay and there will be even more of us. now is your chance to stop the gay gene....

    Unfortunately many of those who believe in the existence of a gay agenda do not believe there's a gay gene. These are the same people who think being gay is a lifestyle choice that can be avoided or corrected, same as with a life of crime.
  • Guycicle

    Posts: 228

    Oct 04, 2013 10:28 AM GMT
    Apparition saidjust reply

    well, it is either let us get married and you never have to deal with us...or risk us becoming your son in law and have to deal with us all the time....and have us pass on our gay genes to your wonderful grandkids ...who will grow up gay and there will be even more of us. now is your chance to stop the gay gene....


    I always thought it would be funny/ironic if homosexuality was strictly genetic and the only way to rid the world of gays was to fully embrace and accept it! icon_razz.gif
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    Oct 04, 2013 12:52 PM GMT
    Guycicle said
    Apparition saidjust reply

    well, it is either let us get married and you never have to deal with us...or risk us becoming your son in law and have to deal with us all the time....and have us pass on our gay genes to your wonderful grandkids ...who will grow up gay and there will be even more of us. now is your chance to stop the gay gene....


    I always thought it would be funny/ironic if homosexuality was strictly genetic and the only way to rid the world of gays was to fully embrace and accept it! icon_razz.gif


    whoa! i never thought about that! That's hilarious!
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    Feb 15, 2014 6:14 PM GMT
    Guycicle said
    Apparition saidjust reply

    I always thought it would be funny/ironic if homosexuality was strictly genetic and the only way to rid the world of gays was to fully embrace and accept it! icon_razz.gif


    awesome!

    I like the way you think
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    Feb 15, 2014 7:55 PM GMT
    FRANKHOMESTEADER saidEvery normal person is sick of there marriage crap being forced in there face , no escape from it .


    their, their, somebunny need a nap?
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    Feb 15, 2014 7:58 PM GMT
    Guycicle said...

    What do you guys think? I'd like to be able to be more understanding of these points of views but I can't help but to think they're just ignorant and/or brainwashed and incapable of empathy. icon_confused.gif


    They better learn to control their gag reflexes.
  • tazzari

    Posts: 2937

    Feb 15, 2014 8:07 PM GMT
    Guycicle saidI see this all the time in forums and on comment sections of articles and I have a hard time wrapping my brain around it. Obviously nobody wants to see themselves as the bad guy.

    I'm just not sure what kind of 'lifestyle' they would agree with for gay people. I'm not even sure why I get annoyed at random people's comments on things, but it still bugs the hell out of me.

    What do you guys think? I'd like to be able to be more understanding of these points of views but I can't help but to think they're just ignorant and/or brainwashed and incapable of empathy. icon_confused.gif


    Ask them to define their terms - that usually spreads panic to this sort of inane, drive-by comment.
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    Feb 15, 2014 8:31 PM GMT
    I just say "nobody asked for your opinion" or tell them they don't get a veto on people being gay, or similar
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Feb 16, 2014 2:54 AM GMT
    Phoenyx said
    FRANKHOMESTEADER saidEvery normal person is sick of there marriage crap being forced in there face , no escape from it

    their, their, somebunny need a nap?

    Nap, hell, 'they' need their chlorpromazine. icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Feb 16, 2014 4:10 AM GMT


    Up here in Canada, once full equality happened, nearly 10 years ago, controversy and media attention on gays evaporated. Poof, gone. We became just like everyone else.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Feb 16, 2014 4:14 AM GMT
    Stupid_NoCure_FrogO.jpg

  • Feb 16, 2014 7:17 AM GMT
    I was glad to have a straight friend tell me about this encounter with a pastor-type... The pastor was of the type that it's a sin, but one shouldn't judge, etc. But he didn't think two men should be married. My friend asked, "But would you marry two fat people?"

    Since the pastor was of the type of "not judging" (cough*yeahright*cough) that at least got him thinking. Sadly those that really pick and choose have all the reasons for why it is still a sin and eating shellfish isn't still a sin all rehearsed, and you can't win with those types of people - those ones it's better to walk away from. But if someone is truly open-minded, sometimes the other comparisons can work.

    Of course, what my friend used isn't a true comparison as - with a few possible medical conditions aside - a person that is fat could lose weight, whereas I could NOT be straight. (Hence the popular videos "Did you choose to be straight?" I've seen on youtube and such).

    Exposure and time help. When my sisters first found out, and thought it was perhaps the result of upbringing, they said, "What did we do wrong?". When I mentioned that having a gay uncle it might be genetic, they said with a look of fear in their eyes: "Does that mean our kids might be gay?" There was no winning. A few years later, and I'm not entirely sure what prompted it to this day, my younger sister started crying about how it wasn't fair to kids if their parents chose to be gay. I had not talked about having kids since when I thought I was straight, and really didn't know how to handle that one.

    But shows/movies are helping (shh, don't let 1 Mil'n Moms know that, even abbreviating in case they google themselves), and once my older sister called me after seeing "Prayers for Bobby" and apologized to me, saying she hadn't realized how hard it could be for me.

    I'm going way off subject here... but if they're close, just be you, let them realize it on their own... if they're not, ask them if they're also sick of the agenda of the disabled and if that group, also discriminated against in the Bible, should be allowed rights.
    http://rarebible.wordpress.com/2010/06/09/god-discriminates-against-the-handicapped/

    The truly obsessed against gays will have their answer ready and should not be bothered with. The others will realize they don't know the Bible like they think they do.

    Leviticus 2118 No man who has any defect may come near: no man who is blind or lame, disfigured or deformed; 19 no man with a crippled foot or hand, 20 or who is hunchbacked or dwarfed, or who has any eye defect, or who has festering or running sores or damaged testicles. 21 No descendant of Aaron the priest who has any defect is to come near to present the offerings made to the LORD by fire. He has a defect; he must not come near to offer the food of his God
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    Feb 16, 2014 1:18 PM GMT
    kiwiLifter said
    oldwomeninlove said
    Up here in Canada, once full equality happened, nearly 10 years ago, controversy and media attention on gays evaporated. Poof, gone. We became just like everyone else.

    Everyone else may beg to differ icon_lol.gif:

    Syphilis problem reaching epidemic levels among Vancouver’s gay community

    Vancouver-area syphilis rates are at epidemic proportions, health officials say, and they’re urging gay and bisexual men to get tested immediately.

    http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/british-columbia/syphilis-problem-reaching-epidemic-levels-among-vancouvers-gay-community/article15509360/

    STI rates increase with multiple sex partners and from practicing unsafe sex. That represents a problem with inadequate education.

    It is NOT a problem arising from marriage equality, the topic of this thread, and to which meninlove was replying. On the contrary, same-sex marriage LOWERS rates of STIs, the same way straight marriage lowers STI rates, because individuals are having fewer different sex partners.

    And that (usually monogamous) marriage partner is available for regular testing, and treatment if needed. For example, my monogamous partner & I are routinely tested for STIs several times a year, along with other infectious diseases, by the same physician we both share. We are therefore HEALTHIER because of our exclusive relationship. You are making a false argument against gay marriage equality.
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    Feb 16, 2014 1:31 PM GMT
    kiwiLifter saidActually more and more gay guys are waking up to the fact they have this exact same sentiment:

    "I'm against gay marriage/I don't agree with that lifestyle/tired of the gay agenda being shoved down my throat"

    Please produce the studies that prove your assertion that "more and more gay guys" don't agree with their own "lifestyle". And that they are against gay marriage, and think a gay agenda is being shoved down their gay throats.

    My own subjective observation suggests just the opposite. Gays in most Western countries are more out than ever. And are eagerly embracing gay marriage. Half the gay couples we know here in Florida have already gotten married in other US States that perform same-sex marriages. Hardly sounds like they are against gay marriage.

    So what are your stats against gay marriage acceptance? Acceptance is continuously rising in the US in the general population according to reliable polls, including among voters, but you claim it's declining among gays themselves? What is your reason for saying that?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2014 2:08 PM GMT
    I tell them, "Yes, there is a gay agenda, and yes, we are coming for your sons. Be very afraid. HAHAHAHAHA"
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2014 2:13 PM GMT
    kiwiLifter said
    oldwomeninlove said

    Up here in Canada, once full equality happened, nearly 10 years ago, controversy and media attention on gays evaporated. Poof, gone. We became just like everyone else.


    Everyone else may beg to differ icon_lol.gif:

    Syphilis problem reaching epidemic levels among Vancouver’s gay community

    Vancouver-area syphilis rates are at epidemic proportions, health officials say, and they’re urging gay and bisexual men to get tested immediately.

    http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/british-columbia/syphilis-problem-reaching-epidemic-levels-among-vancouvers-gay-community/article15509360/


    Your point has no point. icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2014 2:13 PM GMT
    kiwiLifter said
    oldwomeninlove said

    Up here in Canada, once full equality happened, nearly 10 years ago, controversy and media attention on gays evaporated. Poof, gone. We became just like everyone else.


    Everyone else may beg to differ icon_lol.gif:

    Syphilis problem reaching epidemic levels among Vancouver’s gay community

    Vancouver-area syphilis rates are at epidemic proportions, health officials say, and they’re urging gay and bisexual men to get tested immediately.

    http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/british-columbia/syphilis-problem-reaching-epidemic-levels-among-vancouvers-gay-community/article15509360/


    Your point has no point. icon_lol.gif

  • Feb 16, 2014 3:32 PM GMT
    ART_DECO said
    It is NOT a problem arising from marriage equality, the topic of this thread, and to which meninlove was replying. On the contrary, same-sex marriage LOWERS rates of STIs, the same way straight marriage lowers STI rates, because individuals are having fewer different sex partners.

    And that (usually monogamous) marriage partner is available for regular testing, and treatment if needed. For example, my monogamous partner & I are routinely tested for STIs several times a year, along with other infectious diseases, by the same physician we both share. We are therefore HEALTHIER because of our exclusive relationship. You are making a false argument against gay marriage equality.

    This has been one of the reasons why I think it's important to establish that being gay isn't a choice, because once some of these people start to get that, then perhaps they can better see how allowing marriage might actually help lower some of the things they worry about. But as long as they view it as a choice, they'll never view it as a positive option.

    That does remind me of another point I like to make regarding to the original question.... since most people that don't believe in equal rights do think it's a choice... I like to ask, if it's such a choice, why do so many gay or questioning youth end up deciding to live on the streets or even killing themselves? If it was such a choice, rather than being hated for who they feel they are at the core, wouldn't they just choose to be straight?