made my first step to be openly gay

  • Robin_Mark

    Posts: 75

    Oct 14, 2013 8:21 PM GMT
    Tonight for the first time in my life i confessed to my best friend (straight guy) that i am gay and i got a really positive reaction and support from him.

    Now i am thinking would that change our relation or tear us apart.
    if you had the same experience before what would u recommend and which kind of things i should be careful about?
    did u really lose him or he started avoiding u?

    please share some info it will be definitely helpful..
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    Oct 14, 2013 8:29 PM GMT
    Everyone is different. You have to see what works for you.
  • Robin_Mark

    Posts: 75

    Oct 14, 2013 8:57 PM GMT
    JohnSpotter saidEveryone is different. You have to see what works for you.


    Its scary but feels really good. please share ur experience in this regard.
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    Oct 14, 2013 9:10 PM GMT
    You can't make generalizations here.
    With many of my straight-identifying friends, there was either no change in our relationship or - in some cases - things even got better.
    Some couldn't make the break fast enough, never to be heard from again.
    Still others seemingly took the news well (you should NOT call it an "admission.") They even went overboard in trying to demonstrate how accepting they were. Then slowly but surely they extricated themselves from my existence - then were never heard from again.

    It's no different than when you were in school and your parents refused to buy what "everybody" was wearing. So the petty mean kids didn't let you forget it. And your parents would say, "If they can't accept you for who you are they're not your friends." That's assuming this happened to you, but you get the picture. Coming out is a sure-fire way to find out who your friends really are. I spin that as a positive thing - better to lose people over a reality they can't handle than be in a real crisis and find out a harder way.
  • Robin_Mark

    Posts: 75

    Oct 15, 2013 5:57 AM GMT
    okonomiyaki saidYou can't make generalizations here.
    With many of my straight-identifying friends, there was either no change in our relationship or - in some cases - things even got better.
    Some couldn't make the break fast enough, never to be heard from again.
    Still others seemingly took the news well (you should NOT call it an "admission.") They even went overboard in trying to demonstrate how accepting they were. Then slowly but surely they extricated themselves from my existence - then were never heard from again.

    It's no different than when you were in school and your parents refused to buy what "everybody" was wearing. So the petty mean kids didn't let you forget it. And your parents would say, "If they can't accept you for who you are they're not your friends." That's assuming this happened to you, but you get the picture. Coming out is a sure-fire way to find out who your friends really are. I spin that as a positive thing - better to lose people over a reality they can't handle than be in a real crisis and find out a harder way.


    Thank u, i read it 4 times.
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    Oct 15, 2013 12:46 PM GMT
    Robin_Mark saidTonight for the first time in my life i confessed to my best friend (straight guy) that i am gay and i got a really positive reaction and support from him.

    Now i am thinking would that change our relation or tear us apart.
    if you had the same experience before what would u recommend and which kind of things i should be careful about?
    did u really lose him or he started avoiding u?

    please share some info it will be definitely helpful..


    You said that got a positive reaction and support from him. So why are you thinking that your relationship may go downhill if he's giving you support?
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    Oct 15, 2013 1:55 PM GMT
    made my first step to be openly gay

    Is this wise in the UAE? Even if this is a friend you've told, what if he's indiscreet and let's the wrong people learn about you? And can you even BE openly gay there?
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    Oct 15, 2013 5:18 PM GMT
    As good as your intention are, make u sure u know a person well before u share ur sexuality with them. Good luck
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 15, 2013 5:38 PM GMT
    okonomiyaki saidYou can't make generalizations here.
    With many of my straight-identifying friends, there was either no change in our relationship or - in some cases - things even got better.
    Some couldn't make the break fast enough, never to be heard from again.
    Still others seemingly took the news well (you should NOT call it an "admission.") They even went overboard in trying to demonstrate how accepting they were. Then slowly but surely they extricated themselves from my existence - then were never heard from again.

    It's no different than when you were in school and your parents refused to buy what "everybody" was wearing. So the petty mean kids didn't let you forget it. And your parents would say, "If they can't accept you for who you are they're not your friends." That's assuming this happened to you, but you get the picture. Coming out is a sure-fire way to find out who your friends really are. I spin that as a positive thing - better to lose people over a reality they can't handle than be in a real crisis and find out a harder way.


    VERY WISE!!!
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    Oct 15, 2013 7:55 PM GMT
    JohnSpotter saidEveryone is different. You have to see what works for you.


    THIS.

    But in my case none of my best friends changed (or just friends). They treat me the same as they used to icon_smile.gif. Made me realized how stupid I was to keep myself in the closet icon_razz.gif.
  • Robin_Mark

    Posts: 75

    Oct 16, 2013 7:50 AM GMT
    Erik101 said
    Robin_Mark saidTonight for the first time in my life i confessed to my best friend (straight guy) that i am gay and i got a really positive reaction and support from him.

    Now i am thinking would that change our relation or tear us apart.
    if you had the same experience before what would u recommend and which kind of things i should be careful about?
    did u really lose him or he started avoiding u?

    please share some info it will be definitely helpful..


    You said that got a positive reaction and support from him. So why are you thinking that your relationship may go downhill if he's giving you support?


    You are absolutely right, the best is yet to come.
  • Robin_Mark

    Posts: 75

    Oct 16, 2013 7:53 AM GMT
    Marsu said
    JohnSpotter saidEveryone is different. You have to see what works for you.


    THIS.

    But in my case none of my best friends changed (or just friends). They treat me the same as they used to icon_smile.gif. Made me realized how stupid I was to keep myself in the closet icon_razz.gif.


    Thanks, He is becoming closer friend now..
  • Robin_Mark

    Posts: 75

    Oct 16, 2013 7:57 AM GMT
    ART_DECO saidmade my first step to be openly gay

    Is this wise in the UAE? Even if this is a friend you've told, what if he's indiscreet and let's the wrong people learn about you? And can you even BE openly gay there?


    As long I don't walk like a princess in public and no sexual acts in public no one will run after me.

    The guy I confessed to is married and he is very experienced in life. He comes from Ukraine. Thanks for warning me and i will try to be careful.
  • Hammer89

    Posts: 237

    Oct 17, 2013 3:38 AM GMT
    Robin_Mark saidTonight for the first time in my life i confessed to my best friend (straight guy) that i am gay and i got a really positive reaction and support from him.

    Now i am thinking would that change our relation or tear us apart.
    if you had the same experience before what would u recommend and which kind of things i should be careful about?
    did u really lose him or he started avoiding u?

    please share some info it will be definitely helpful..


    When I told my best friend I was gay, him and I actually became closer friends. He thought it was cool that I was into guys and he was really proud of me. I am now his baby boys Godfather.
  • Robin_Mark

    Posts: 75

    Oct 21, 2013 4:59 AM GMT
    Racerx76 said
    Robin_Mark saidTonight for the first time in my life i confessed to my best friend (straight guy) that i am gay and i got a really positive reaction and support from him.

    Now i am thinking would that change our relation or tear us apart.
    if you had the same experience before what would u recommend and which kind of things i should be careful about?
    did u really lose him or he started avoiding u?

    please share some info it will be definitely helpful..


    When I told my best friend I was gay, him and I actually became closer friends. He thought it was cool that I was into guys and he was really proud of me. I am now his baby boys Godfather.


    Happy to hear that.. Thank you.