HIV and SEX what the hell

  • jock4u

    Posts: 8

    Oct 17, 2013 1:06 AM GMT
    Please anyone any comments would be helpful, I am not sure what to think and something that has made me so turned off about my friends and I feel I want to distance myself from them

    About 2 years ago I have had 2 friends that just found out they where HIV positive, they are now on Meds and anti depressants. The problem is about a year ago I have noticed that they have turned into total sluts and don't even care about life . there whole personality has changed and I hate to even be around them . One guy has even filmed on a adult movie. They both had 2 long term great relationships but now have left there partners ... what is going on here. do you think it is the meds or something else that made them change. I don't know what to do and I don't know what to tell them... I give up...




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    Oct 17, 2013 5:41 AM GMT
    When I was 19, I learned that I was HIV+. This was 1984, and there was no cure. Pretty much, if you learned you were HIV+, you had about a year to live. Some people learned that they had less time sooner when they came down with weird immune diseases which wasted them and killed them sooner.

    I saw other young men take to the path of drugs and sex after learning they were HIV+. They saw no hope and must have figured that they should party hard before they dropped dead. And, they did drop dead. Unfortunately, they also spread the virus. Some because they did not care, and some knowingly and out of anger.

    You can try to share a message of hope with your friends, and it may break your heart if they choose not to listen. You can throw somebody a life preserver, but you can't make them grab it.

    Like you, I am saddened to hear that young people are still getting infected by HIV. Like you, I am saddened when HIV+ young people cannot see the great hope that lives before them in the miraculous treatments which can keep us well and alive for a rich full life.

    Sadly, there does come a point when you cannot help others if and when they choose not to help themselves. We must live forward, live strong, and move on so that we can share our experience, strength, and hope with others who are seeking what you, I, and others have to offer.

    May your Higher Power bless you richly, and bring comfort to your soul even as your heart is aching.

    Aloha and Be Well!
    Alan

  • jock4u

    Posts: 8

    Oct 17, 2013 10:01 PM GMT
    How true, I have just about given up hope and I believe its time to just move on. I have had my many talks to them but there ears are closed to even listen to any good advise or any help I can give.
    Honestly they used to be great guys but this has taken a turn for the worst , and shame on them for passing it on to others ..... what a mess. if they live this way I believe there life will be cut even shorter. Sad really.
    Oh should I mention .they are also hooked on pain pills and Viagra and god know what else....
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    Oct 19, 2013 7:05 PM GMT
    unfortunately they are only able to help themselves. As Alan said, it is not a death sentence, however it appears your friend may think so. You have tried to coach and be their friends, you did your part! They can only change if and when they want to.
    I'd keep in touch with them, on occasion. You have to move on, and hopefully one day they will see the light, before its not too late.
    Cheers..
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    Oct 19, 2013 9:15 PM GMT
    jock4u saidHow true, I have just about given up hope and I believe its time to just move on. I have had my many talks to them but there ears are closed to even listen to any good advise or any help I can give.
    Honestly they used to be great guys but this has taken a turn for the worst , and shame on them for passing it on to others ..... what a mess. if they live this way I believe there life will be cut even shorter. Sad really.
    Oh should I mention .they are also hooked on pain pills and Viagra and god know what else....


    I'm sorry to hear that your friends have gone this route. I know the pain seeing others who are in active addiction and making other lifestyle choices which are self-destructive. Yes, you need to move on with your life and friends who are reaching for the stars.
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    Oct 19, 2013 9:30 PM GMT
    I've noticed the same thing in the community.. actually had run ins with two guys who both knew they were + and wanted to have unprotected sex with me. And when I told them I wasn't into that they got upset with me and needles to say I just had to go to bed a horny beaver. They didn't even tell me they had the virus until much much later
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    Oct 20, 2013 12:34 AM GMT
    Behemothboi saidI've noticed the same thing in the community.. actually had run ins with two guys who both knew they were + and wanted to have unprotected sex with me. And when I told them I wasn't into that they got upset with me and needles to say I just had to go to bed a horny beaver. They didn't even tell me they had the virus until much much later


    This is why I tell everybody to ALWAYS USE CONDOMS even if your partner claims they are HIV negative.