need advice for first timer

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 26, 2013 4:56 AM GMT
    well, I am a virgin and I have never been with a guy, but I was really curious to be with one badly so I decided to look for random hookups online. and I did find someone so I was really nervous so I just decided to have just have oral and rim sex and when I finally tried it. it was werid for me, the guy had a hairy ass so when I rimmed him it was kinda sloppy and when I gave head I felt like werid like I hated it but im gay and im suppose to like it, watching porn it turned me on but its really different in real life and after half an hour I just decided to leave, I was not really turned on at all , so my question is when you perform oral and rim job, theyre the ones who are suppose to enjoy it and ur just suppose to perform it?icon_question.gif
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    Nov 26, 2013 5:24 AM GMT
    Contrary to what you see in porn videos, sex can be clunky when you are first starting out. Rather than doing random hookups, try finding a guy to date. If you feel comfortable with a guy, have an emotional connection and are genuinely turned on him, the enjoyment goes up considerably.
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    Nov 26, 2013 5:26 AM GMT
    Do (in a safe manner) what you fantasize about. Go after the guys who turn you on, not just any random guy who will have you.

    Also, if you haven't been schooled in safer sex practices, sexual risk assessment and risk management, then go to an HIV/AIDS services organization and learn. They have facilitated youth groups where you can talk with peers about your questions usually with a professional counselor present.

    And, relax and have fun!
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    Nov 26, 2013 5:48 AM GMT
    My story is quite similar to yours. Still a virgin. Last week I was so unbearably curious (and horny) that I visited a gay bathhouse for the very first time.

    The farthest I went sexually was caressing, cuddling, and giving hand jobs. I dare not give blow jobs to anyone. Anything anal is out of the question for me. While I was cuddling with someone, some other guy gave me a blow job, which was unwelcome and uncalled for, but I was too preoccupied with a guy to brush him off.

    Needless to say, I felt awkward too. Some guys there wanted me to give them blow jobs; some even tried to force me to go down on him, but I wouldn't do it. I didn't even get off the whole time I was there.

    I agree with some people here that for sex to be pleasurable, there must be some emotional connection first.
  • JohnWoodHill

    Posts: 103

    Nov 26, 2013 6:42 AM GMT
    I think there is a misconception here. I understand the desire to have sex when dating, but hardly for the emotional connection, but more the feeling of being comfortable.

    Personally I think you are trying to force something that should come so naturally. Give yourself the opportunities, but if you are not feeling it, just don't bother and I agree get someone you actually find attractive, it helps a lot. As for the oral, I have no idea what you were working with, but I can say that not everyone likes to lick a hairy hole, for all you know you are not the giving type.

    Personally you shouldn't judge all sex on just one attempt, I still get a lot of bad experiences but I also have a massive amount of good ones, experiment and see what you like.
  • jo2hotbod

    Posts: 3603

    Nov 26, 2013 11:06 AM GMT
    You can't force yourself into the experience, like anything there has to be something there to make it matter, especially for your first time