Does the majority of gays want a relationship

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 08, 2013 4:58 PM GMT
    Being gay turns you into a loner?? I know there are a lot of gay's who seek a relationship but think they struggle to find one, because most guys just want one night stands.
    Am i right?
    I think growing up being gay is hard for most people. Fitting in at school, automatically denying your sexuality because you know, even though your a child yourself, that children just dont understand. Then you get used of denial, and carry on with that. till one day, you realize that this long rode finding yourself, has a wall, the one you built! And the only way to further yourself is by stopping what, for me, was 'the only thing i lied about' when asked a question. I wanted to be true to myself, and feel completely pure, i dont tell lies, id just rather not answer but sometimes i got cornered haha came out a few month back and realizing now though that not only me, but alot of other gays, went down this road. Are used of loneliness, find comfort in that, and think that they are better off on there own. Or is it just me haha??

    Also having your penis out in 'adult pics' is that bad. haha
    Mind i dont think so, taking everything into consideration, website and all. As long as its handled tastefully right?
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    Dec 08, 2013 5:13 PM GMT
    I'd agree that it seems most guys don't want a relationship.
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    Dec 08, 2013 5:14 PM GMT
    And those that do, are pretty picky, and have a small selection to choose from.
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    Dec 08, 2013 10:58 PM GMT
    Yes and No.

    Yes because ultimately I want the right guy that I can grow old with. No because I know that you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince! I'm not going to settle with someone I'm not into!

    Lol, I should go on the Bachelor (gay edition) and find myself a man on there. Hahaha icon_redface.gificon_redface.gif
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    Dec 09, 2013 12:51 AM GMT
    Most guys I've seen over the years just want to have fun....DESPITE what their profile say otherwise.

    Sometimes I get too jaded because I wonder if I am kidding myself into believe that I'll ever end up with an honest relationship.
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    Dec 09, 2013 1:06 AM GMT
    It seems like most don't a relationship, but it's hard to know what the statistics really are. In the real world, I think there are more guys who want relationship, since a lot of relationship oriented guys don't market themselves online and prefer to go out to meet guys face to face.
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    Dec 09, 2013 1:22 AM GMT
    another thing is most guys' sexual needs are very high, so they are willing to hook up with guys that they wouldn't really want a relationship with (or hookup without taking time to get to know each other and then both lose interest afterwards). This makes it seem like a lot of guys are only looking for hookups, but really it's that our sex drives are so loud they override our patience to wait for a connection. It also cuts to the sexual before any time for any mental/emotional chemistry to develop and build.

    Less of an issue with straight relationships because women *generally* want to establish some sort of connection and comfortability before getting sexual, so the "nice pic, wanna fuck?" mentality isn't as successful.

    My question is in an ocean of guys who seem only to want hookups, how do you first find a mutually interested guy looking for a relationship, and then get to know each other and develop some common ground before blowing loads and losing interest in the sticky stranger next to you?

    Internet and bars may work for some, but in general I think they tend to select for guys who are lookin to get laid. Seems the best way would be to get really engaged in your life and activities, and meet people naturally that way, thus starting out with common interests and developing some chemistry. Unfortunately, though I've met a lot of great friends this way, it hasn't brought anything close to a relationship into my life. Maybe some of us are just meant to be on our own.

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  • BloodFlame

    Posts: 1768

    Dec 09, 2013 3:08 AM GMT
    I think it really depends on your location that can determine how you feel. I'm pretty sure at the end of the day, there are plenty of guys who want a relationship.

    But where I live, I certainly get the impression that a lot of guys don't want to date or have a relationship but just have a quick night in the sheets. Sometimes, at least for me, being gay feels like a curse considering that men are highly sexual so it's only natural in a way that most men want to screw each other and never have a relationship.
  • Apparition

    Posts: 3534

    Dec 09, 2013 5:10 AM GMT
    go on any gay site and look for guys in their thirties looking to hook up or whatever..notice there are almost none...almost all guys in their thirties are attached til they are 40 or so with one guy. Try looking.

    99.9% of homo guys are too chickenshit to ask a guy out. Just find a hot boy and tell him he is now your boyfriend, he will accept.
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    Dec 09, 2013 6:47 AM GMT
    They'd rather have a hot man
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    Dec 09, 2013 10:04 PM GMT
    IRFire66 saidAnd those that do, are pretty picky, and have a small selection to choose from.


    I agree with this statement... unfortunately icon_cry.gif
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    Dec 10, 2013 12:59 AM GMT
    I know I do want a boyfriend icon_cool.gif
  • winwin

    Posts: 264

    Dec 10, 2013 2:22 AM GMT
    I want a true long lasting monogamous relationship. I know most gays only want sex and no commitments, so what happens to those who have multiple sex partners when they get older? Who would want them when they get to be over 50 and 60??? By then nobody would want anything to do with them so they end up alone for the rest of their lives.
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    Dec 11, 2013 5:36 AM GMT
    IRFire66 saidI'd agree that it seems most guys don't want a relationship.


    I don't agree. I think most guys want a relationship. But not with A, too short; not B, we don't like the same movie; not C, blarblarblar
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    Dec 12, 2013 2:10 AM GMT
    Let's face it, gay men start up a relationship by hooking up. It sounds weird, but really gay men are very visual, and into appearance. We see the cover before we read the "magazine". Is that bad? I don't think so, but it requires a lot of men to hookup with, before you actually find THE one that will start that burning desire to be with each other, outside of the bedroom.
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    Dec 12, 2013 2:16 AM GMT
    gayusasian82 said
    IRFire66 saidI'd agree that it seems most guys don't want a relationship.


    I don't agree. I think most guys want a relationship. But not with A, too short; not B, we don't like the same movie; not C, blarblarblar


    I agree with you.

    I also think that there are a lot of people who are in relationship, it might be just that we don't really see them much. Especially if we use dating sites right?
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    Dec 12, 2013 3:21 AM GMT
    Hiker98 saidLet's face it, gay men start up a relationship by hooking up. It sounds weird, but really gay men are very visual, and into appearance. We see the cover before we read the "magazine". Is that bad? I don't think so, but it requires a lot of men to hookup with, before you actually find THE one that will start that burning desire to be with each other, outside of the bedroom.


    Ack. My hookup list has gotten way too long for comfort and while i had some fun, I never found anyone good and steady. Now I'm to the point that the thought of doing that indefinitely sounds really frustrating and gross, and I think I'd probably catch a disease before I'd ever find a guy for me. There's gotta be another way?
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    Dec 12, 2013 3:23 AM GMT
    gayusasian82 said
    IRFire66 saidI'd agree that it seems most guys don't want a relationship.


    I don't agree. I think most guys want a relationship. But not with A, too short; not B, we don't like the same movie; not C, blarblarblar


    Ok, I'll give you that. There is probably a lot of truth to this one.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 12, 2013 4:42 AM GMT
    Gay men are in search of this magical unicorn they like referring to as "the right guy"...
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    Dec 12, 2013 6:20 AM GMT
    Lol I retracted my answer, YES, I'm only saying this because of the Holiday pressures/blues and I've slept with enough guys to know what I want now. And yes, I do admit that I did back out and broke up with guys in the past because I was afraid, immature and not ready! Yes, my love life history was a mess but no one's perfect. You learn and grow with time. (I feel a little bit like Ethan Green in that gay comedy) Lol icon_redface.gif