Introvert-Extrovert Relationships. Can they work?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 24, 2013 12:40 AM GMT
    I'm an extrovert but I have been involved with introverts and felt like their introversion left me feeling unfulfilled in the relationship. This is still an ongoing matter for me to process in my life.

    I'm not looking for advice. What I am looking for (and am hoping that it will make for an interesting thread), is to hear from you introverts who have dated extroverts, or from you extroverts who have dated introverts. How's that working out for you?
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    Dec 24, 2013 12:50 AM GMT
    It works out fine. I am an extrovert but I get to talk and socialise during the day while introverts I know seek out jobs they can do more independently. Also, I do things like talk to the waiter/taxi driver/drunk guy/mad woman so they don't have to.

    I think the hardest to resolve personality clash is to do with humour - if one person likes inappropriate/dark humour and the other doesn't they will label each other weird and boring respectively.
  • The_Guruburu

    Posts: 895

    Dec 24, 2013 12:55 AM GMT
    I'm naturally more of an introvert, but lately I've had to be more outgoing with all these other introverted guys I've been seeing. Constantly having to be the one to carry the conversation myself is so exhausting, it's like pulling teeth! I'd much rather be with someone more extroverted who is more adept at the give and take of basic communication and draws me out of my introversion because I'm excited by what they say, not because they don't say anything.

    I guess to answer your question, I think such matches can work if they are complimentary and balanced.
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    Dec 24, 2013 1:03 AM GMT
    Hm, I don't really know if it has been such a big issue for me and my ex and my dates. I'd like to think it has not been an issue at all.

    I am somewhat introverted and can't live without me-only-time. I think introversion is part of me, so if someone does not like it, oh well, what can I do?

    I go on compromise though if my partner does not feel fulfilled. In fact I'd try to do a lot if only the other party will communicate that to me.

    Maybe there are other characteristics/traits that are associated with introversion and people don't like it. I don't know.
  • donnygg

    Posts: 19

    Dec 24, 2013 3:20 PM GMT
    It's not about extraversion and introversion. It's about personality. Contrary to the stereotypes about extraverts and introverts, there are introverts who can hold a conversation and appear extraverted and vice versa. I've been studying MBTI a lot lately and it's really fascinating stuff. I don't mean the pop-culture, horoscope-esque MBTI descriptions but the real MBTI down to the cognitive functions. Only certain I and E types match well, some are ok and others are highly conflicting. It's probably a bit too geeky and heavy for most people but I think it really helps understand how people function and with communication.

    I'm an introvert myself and I've not dated a lot but the guys I felt most intensely for have been smart, witty and caring introverts. There are extroverts that I feel a connection with too but they are introvert-looking extraverts. MBTI or not, it's all about connection and communication.