How to meet gay men (Seriously)

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2014 1:29 PM GMT
    Here is the thing:

    I'm a kissless god tier virgin who hasn't been with anybody since the beginning of time. That being said, I don't know how to find men with mutual interest in me. I mean, I don't keep my homosexuality as a secret at all, but I don't find the need to put it out there every time I talk. I need advice from you all wise people about the following:

    -How do I find gay men in the mainstream party scene? The only gay bar where I live is known for being kind of a shithole.

    -How do I advertise myself (not literally) to gay men? If not possible, I would like to know how to make a first move.

    And last (this is a hard one)
    -How do I recognize gay men amongst everybody else? I've heard that eye contact was foolproof but I usually need alcohol to do that because of my shyness. icon_rolleyes.gif

    I hope this doesn't look too naive in this forum but I don't know who else can help me. Maybe this helps others too. Thanks a lot. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2014 2:23 PM GMT
    Ask your straight friends if they have any gay family or friends to whom they can introduce you -- not just as potential dates but also as potential connection to a wider gay social circle. Good luck.
  • lgg5819

    Posts: 141

    Jan 06, 2014 8:26 PM GMT
    If you're just trying to lose your virginity I suggest Grindr. Yeah, I know... But I sincerely think everyone should go through a slut phase at least once just, because, why not? It will help you build some confidence to start meeting guys in more conventional ways and will help you get your feet wet and hands dirty with guys who you won't mind hitting and quitting. Do I think you should live the Grindr lifestyle forever? No, not at all. I think guys who do that are kind of sad and emotionally immature. But I think you should at least try it out so you can get out of the mindset of, "I'm an insecure virgin, help me."
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2014 9:03 PM GMT
    lgg5819 saidIf you're just trying to lose your virginity I suggest Grindr.


    Sex is not what I'm looking for now, I mean I wouldn't reject it either but I'm more into meeting guys and feel what is like to be in a sort of romantic relationship. Then take things to the next level. I think the slut phase will not come to me this soon icon_lol.gif

    Anyway thank you all for the advice.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2014 9:06 PM GMT
    To be honest, I wouldn't rush it. Let it happen on its own. In my opinion, it's better to lose your virginity to someone who loves you rather than some stranger you met on Grindr or at a club. I lost my virginity at 20 and I don't regret it. You are a good looking guy, just be patient.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2014 10:03 PM GMT
    Seek out gay activity groups and be social, there is a chance you can meet someone through one, and if you make friends, they might be able to introduce you to someone nice.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 10, 2014 8:13 PM GMT
    Definitely eye contact, and they always carry themselves differently , and gay men walk with their chests out(even the not fit ones) we are like peacocks lol
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    Jan 10, 2014 9:42 PM GMT
    Eye contact! a regular guy will look and then just look away and continue his business, while a guy who IS interested will look at you and his look will linger. Or if they constantly keep looking in your direction. It never fails.
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    Jan 11, 2014 4:49 AM GMT
    I'm guessing you are in a small city or town. Perhaps you have to travel to a bigger place (Madrid? Bilbao?) where there are gay bars and other places where gays hang out, in order to meet any.
  • BlackZR1

    Posts: 21

    Jan 14, 2014 7:26 AM GMT
    I'm in the same boat as you, OP. I don't even have a gay bar in my town.

    Hopefully I'll be in San Diego by next year-speaking of which...what's the gay scene like down there? Anyone know?
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    Jan 14, 2014 7:33 AM GMT
    Varus saidEye contact! a regular guy will look and then just look away and continue his business, while a guy who IS interested will look at you and his look will linger. Or if they constantly keep looking in your direction. It never fails.


    How about he is a serial killer seeing his next victim?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 14, 2014 3:39 PM GMT
    silverwolf94 said
    Varus saidEye contact! a regular guy will look and then just look away and continue his business, while a guy who IS interested will look at you and his look will linger. Or if they constantly keep looking in your direction. It never fails.


    How about he is a serial killer seeing his next victim?


    That still means he's still interested. icon_lol.gif
  • RGW94

    Posts: 84

    Jan 14, 2014 10:26 PM GMT
    Just be patient. It'll happen. Don't make any decisions you'll regret.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 15, 2014 10:31 PM GMT
    just make a lot of gay friends (and hookup if u want), but those gay friends will introduce u to others probably and then u have more options for dating icon_smile.gif and theres no such thing as too much friends ! icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 20, 2014 9:20 AM GMT
    Go look for outreach groups for LGBTQ or maybe expand your social networking. Honestly, I think it's better to wait on the virginity part for a guy that you love. I mean, I got my ass fucked and lost my virginity and I kind of regret it because I didn't love him, plus I was totally unprepared and noobish for his thick dick. I could say the same thing for last time as well, and I was pretty stupid, but the guy came by just looking at my bod lol. What I think would be good for you is to just go to that gay bar. I mean, it might not be the shit hole that you believe it is.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 21, 2014 10:10 AM GMT
    I usually try online dating, going out to bars sometimes and just do my things generally. I don't actively go around and have a **I Need a bf on my forehead! But yeah it's all about eyes contact, if you stare at a guy and he stares back, smile for more than 5 seconds! Oh yeah, he wants to sleep with you!! icon_redface.gif
  • jackp0t

    Posts: 50

    Jan 24, 2014 2:27 AM GMT
    bar is better than a club, but go with a friend.
    Being extroverted can completely change your life.
    People like confidence, and even if its not sexual, you could make a great friend, or at least know you're better off without them icon_biggrin.gif

    Good luck
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 25, 2014 1:36 PM GMT
    Its gotta be tough bro. I work and surf with all str8 dudes at my job. Even my gym seems like a str8 hang out