Motivation without a gym partner

  • shortGymCA

    Posts: 51

    Sep 20, 2007 2:40 PM GMT
    Hey guys, my gym partner recently dropped out of the gym. I was seeing such great gains with a person to work with and to spot me on bench and such including putting on a good 10 lbs of muscle mass and some great definition and size on my arms (body pic is a before, need to take an after soon).

    With no gym partner, I'm definitely not as motivated and reluctant to push myself especially on bench and ab excercises.

    any tips on motivation? or anyone go to Miami Rec that wants a gym partner?
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    Sep 20, 2007 3:39 PM GMT
    I used to be like you....my boyfriend used to be my workout partner. Well... I like to work out in the mornings and he likes to work out after work....now I go by myself and let me tell you I lose a lot less time talking and goofing around and work out harder and concentrate better.

    I think I might like to have someone to work out "sometimes" but I love to do it my myself must of the time. It is my "me", "quite" time.



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    Sep 20, 2007 3:42 PM GMT
    I dont have a workout partner now, and when i did i always felt like i got nothing accomplished.

    I'm pretty self motivated (a trait from being an only child), so i push myself more than if i had a partner.

    Besides i'm in enough classes that are filled with other people that i dont need a partner at the gym... that's me time!
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    Sep 20, 2007 3:43 PM GMT
    You have to become self sufficient with your workouts...your body cannot be left to the mercy of others...push yourself to get in there and do it yourself....Use a Smith machine for bench if you have no spotter...

    Ive never had a training partner...i do it for myself and by myself...i work out at home...no one here but me...and I do it every day and Im told look pretty damn good for it...You can do it to...its all in your MIND!!
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    Sep 20, 2007 5:21 PM GMT
    Just do it.
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    Sep 20, 2007 5:43 PM GMT
    Yea, you have to become self sufficient. And you also need to understand why you are doing what you are doing, and WHO you are doing it for. If you are only training to impress others with your six pack and cannonball delts, then you skew the real reason why you are there anyway. Use an iPod to listen to your own music and get in your own groove.

    I must admit, having a trainin partner can really motivate you to do a better job with your training. Keep looking around the gym and watch for some other guy who is working out by himself and strike up a conversation if you can. Thats one way I was able to find a terrific training partner for a year or so, and I was sad when I had to move away from him. He really fired me up, and I did the same to him. I also think its the chemistry between you and your training partner. If it clicks, great. If both of you are on the same track sort of, then great. But the most important thing is to NOT become so self dependent on a training partner that when you do loose one, you loose your drive and ambition. Keep the faith buddy...you will find your answer. But until that time, GO WORK OUT!!!! DAVE
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    Sep 20, 2007 10:12 PM GMT
    Quit being a sissy, and either find another partner, or workout.

    Duh.
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    Sep 20, 2007 10:46 PM GMT
    Watch 300. That always makes me wanna go to the gym. It'll either get you pumped, or make you feel bad about yourself. That gets me going.
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    Sep 20, 2007 11:29 PM GMT
    Ask someone to spot you when they are in between exercises or sets. It's also a good way to strike up that conversation someone mentioned, and may lead to a new gym partner.
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    Sep 20, 2007 11:36 PM GMT
    I'll take a stab at this question, but on the serious side, since I've experienced this quite often.

    It's great to have a partner to help you through a workout, but don't think about it as 'misery loves company.' Yeah, working out is hard at times, but depending on someone else for support won't do it in the long run, and thinking as working out as a chore won't help either.

    Think about why you wanted to start working out in the first place: you want to get stronger, be able to run a marathon, or just want to look good naked. These are reasons for yourself, goals you set upon yourself.

    Also, think about how much you've accomplished so far. You said you put on 10lbs. of muscle? That's awesome! Acknowledge it, congratulate yourself, and reward yourself.

    Put a plan into action and do the research to formulate the plan. Look up and find exercises, both machine and free weight, to do and get closer to your goal. Find things you can do on your own without help; they're out there.

    Keep focused on your goal, and work towards them. If you misstep, don't beat yourself over it. Get right back on the horse and keep moving.
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    Sep 21, 2007 10:51 AM GMT
    hey chucky, do you like the smell of napalm in the morning?
  • iHavok

    Posts: 1477

    Sep 21, 2007 1:57 PM GMT
    I've decided work out partners only slow me down.

    Just remember all the problems you had from having one, and let that help motivate you to just get it done.
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    Sep 21, 2007 4:40 PM GMT
    I have had workout partners in the past, but prefer to workout solo because I find the quantity and the quality of my workout is better. I generally don't talk at the gym to keep focused on what I am doing and use the time to gather my thoughts and have a bit of personal time. To stay motivated sometimes I like to put my own music mix on that is up tempo which helps to get me through the reps and sets.

    While it is great to have someone motivate you to workout, you can't rely on it; you need to have the self drive/motivation to improve your body. You do have the capability to do things on your own. The success that you have had in your workouts is a direct result of you, you may have had support from a workout partner, but they didn’t put that muscle and definition on you….you did. Never forget that most everyone at the gym would be willing to spot a set between their sets, so don’t be afraid to just ask.
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    Sep 21, 2007 10:07 PM GMT
    I always workout alone I just focus better.

    But I treat it as a team game and that I am th eopponent always wanting to get one up on my last session. I set myself a target of 3 PB's per session and if I dont hit them I am mightily pissed off, thankfully that happens rarely.

    My not book is my panacea with each sessions achievements in it. It helps me focus on the necessary progression and damn stubborn to beat last session.
  • shortGymCA

    Posts: 51

    Sep 23, 2007 4:35 AM GMT
    well I guess this will stop me from ever asking a question again.

    It seems someone asking for input really invites other people to insult or say how much better they are.

    no worries, training goes on.
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    Sep 23, 2007 1:50 PM GMT
    Cougarboy,

    I am glad you asked the question. I am struggling with the same issue. When I had a workout partner, I lost 30 lbs and looked great. Then our work schedules changed and life interfered, I gain 60lbs and look like a beach ball with hands and feet.

    I did workout alone and injured myself. Had I had my old partner, a nurse, he would have told me that I would be a fool to try to lift that much...when my ego gets the best of me.

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    Sep 23, 2007 4:12 PM GMT
    My dogs are always pushing me to get outside for a little run. On the other hand, they hate it when I lift weights, because there's nothing in it for them. They just lay there and stare at me. They have this way of making me feel guilty.
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    Sep 23, 2007 4:29 PM GMT
    WorldTrekker07 wrote:I have had workout partners in the past, but prefer to workout solo because I find the quantity and the quality of my workout is better. I generally don't talk at the gym to keep focused on what I am doing and use the time to gather my thoughts and have a bit of personal time...you may have had support from a workout partner, but they didn’t put that muscle and definition on you….you did.


    I couldn't agree more with all of this.

    The guy I was dating this past spring joined my gym and decided we were gym partners. I didn't mind at first because it was kind of fun...and also led to some hot after gym sex :)

    When it really boiled down to is, he wasn't a very good gym partner - he was very discouraging (complained all the time; never kept track of his workouts; etc.), so when we broke up I fired him as my gym partner.

    Besides, I really like working out by myself a lot better.


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 23, 2007 5:50 PM GMT
    oh come on cougarboy....don't be like that!

    you post a question for an opinion...and remember what they say about opinons?

    OPINIONS ARE LIKE ASSHOLES...EVERYONE HAS ONE....SOME JUST SMELL MORE THAN OTHERS....

    if someone can't be supportive to you....i call them SANDBAGGERS....they will do anything to put you down, make you feel less than you are, all in the name of "trying to help you" decide on what to do. they call it being supportive, i say use your MENTAL DELETE key....i do that all the time!

    you actually know deep inside what to do...make your short term goal list and go for it. think about the long term results and you will be amazed how much that can energize you!
    DAVE
  • Starboard

    Posts: 242

    Sep 23, 2007 6:32 PM GMT
    I relocated about a year ago so not knowing many people I've had to go it alone in the gym and just about everywhere else. When it comes to working out, I've developed a few tricks to keep me flying solo:

    A) Personal trainer -- it's expensive, but worth it and solves the dilemma of working out alone/motivation
    B) SHOES! -- or some other form of new workout gear tends to make going to the gym a little easier
    C) Supplements -- I don't put much stock into anything beyond the basics (creatine, protein, multivitamin), but a trip to the GNC store always has aisles sharply packaged bottles that all claim to be the silver bullet to jumpstart my workout. My better judgment tells me there's no such thing as a miracle in a bottle, but my body seems to respond to either the placebo effect or the wishful thinking...
    D) Classes -- I've tried yoga, pump, hip hop, spinning and a Swiss ball class. I never stick with them for very long, but when I start feeling lost in the gym the structure and energy of a class tends to help get me back into my own routine
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    Sep 23, 2007 6:50 PM GMT
    Or, as Starboard will tell you, get a coxswain!

    In truth though, just coming to this site and checking a few profiles usually kicks ME in the ass.
  • Starboard

    Posts: 242

    Sep 23, 2007 7:08 PM GMT
    Yes, Gigaram is correct as a coxswain is an excellent motivational force. Should you choose this option, I would also suggest finding a good therapist to help you deal with the feelings of anxiety, aggression and low-self esteem which will surely replace the void that was once filled with your lack of motivation...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 23, 2007 7:14 PM GMT
    Motivation? Sure...

    gabebigarmsa.jpg

    or maybe that is just more like inspiration...
  • shortGymCA

    Posts: 51

    Sep 24, 2007 1:38 PM GMT
    well sorry for the brash words. Some of the reply posts were just a little too self congratulatory. As a wise person just posted above opinions are like assholes, everyone's got um (and some of you just gotta fuck.)

    inspiration not the problem, just the need to push the last 20 minutes of a workout and the staying not bored with my program or simple things like a spotter.

    I'm doing the podcast approach right now if you havent heard podunner check it out on itunes a new track once a week set to a different BPM so you can find a speed thats good for you.

    I would definitely agree that movies like 300 are good motivation as is this site in general.
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    Sep 25, 2007 8:13 PM GMT
    self congratulatory? The idea was to inspire you and motivate you so hopefuly you can find something to latch onto that will inspire ya tskkkkk some people are so ungrateful ;-)