Online Meet up Vs. In person

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 24, 2014 10:23 PM GMT
    So, I believe the reason online meet up/dating is so popular among gay people is, because gay/bi/bi-curious men in journal suck at communicating when it comes face to face. With online ads things are pretty cleared up and there are no games (except craigslist flakes). For example, there is this guy at my gym I saw few weeks ago, but nothing serious crossed my mind. He however, kept checking me out. Every time I caught him looking, he quickly turned other way, I thought it was kinda cute. Then, past week or so it became pretty obvious that he is interested. Glances were longer, If I am warming up at bike he comes right next to me and starts stretching (2 occasions). By now I am interested and wondering why isn't he making a move. So, today I am doing cardio. A random man in the corner, my mat in the middle and he comes and gets the mat right next to mine. We stare another glance. Man leaves, I move to the corner now and he quickly moves his mat next to me as well. I thought it's gone far enough, so I start a conversation that does he goes to so and so college? He said yeah and tell me his program. But the way he told me was so, full of attitude, no smile in the conversation and face had kinda angry expression. After that I worked out for another 5 mins or so and left, he never asked anything back. That was a big turn off and I am no longer interested. May be he's frustrated/ confused that I make him curious and bring gay tendencies in him. Anyways gay or not If a stranger talks to me I at least reply pleasantly. Hence the reason, the overload of online dating in the gay community and all the side effects (deceases) that come with it. What do you guys think?
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Jan 24, 2014 11:22 PM GMT
    ikilledcaptainplanet saidyour situation. you're only assuming that the guy is gay where you don't know if he is or not and plus he might have been in a bad mood so you really can't judge him off of that. another thing too... stop projecting. just because you want him doesn't mean that he's gay.

    If Jeet's description of events is accurate, the dude was pursuing him. No way an uninterested or even clueless straight guy would do all that.
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Jan 24, 2014 11:36 PM GMT
    ikilledcaptainplanet saidi know plenty of guys that acted the same way that only wanted to be my friend and they had girlfriends and wives too. maybe that guy was shy. it's never a good idea to assume that someone is gay or checking you out off of something such as looking at somebody.

    Yeah, its never a good idea to *assume* anything about anyone but, come on, get real. None of this sounds very "shy" to me.

    So you know plenty of guys that gave you repeated and increasing eye contact, repeatedly positioned themselves to do stretching next to you and even follow you when you move to a new location, and they were all straight with girlfriends and wives. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 24, 2014 11:54 PM GMT
    MikeW said
    ikilledcaptainplanet saidi know plenty of guys that acted the same way that only wanted to be my friend and they had girlfriends and wives too. maybe that guy was shy. it's never a good idea to assume that someone is gay or checking you out off of something such as looking at somebody.

    Yeah, its never a good idea to *assume* anything about anyone but, come on, get real. None of this sounds very "shy" to me.

    So you know plenty of guys that gave you repeated and increasing eye contact, repeatedly positioned themselves to do stretching next to you and even follow you when you move to a new location, and they were all straight with girlfriends and wives. icon_rolleyes.gif


    This.. It's been about 3 weeks now with checking each other out. And u know he was doing walking lunges, bike are on the side of the gym.. and I was sitting on the middle bikes. He stops right at infront of my bike, then the bike next to me, he starts to stretch, first I didn't look nd then finally u know he still didn't move. We look at each other nd then he continues the stretch and moves. And today, the cardio thing, which is in the corner. I am straight acting and all have straight friends who I have no trouble talking to. The way he replied over such a simple question of what collage u go to? It was full of confusing emotions for him and seemed painful to watch. I think ignoring would have been better for the both of us. lol
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 25, 2014 12:03 AM GMT
    "i've been in enough situations where people looked at me, followed me around and it wasn't because they wanted my dick. there could be other reasons. hell, it could actually be a bad thing. they might be plotting on robbing you or they could be crazy. you never know. that's why i'm like it's never safe to assume something like that."

    you know the thing is, it's day time, gym is not too packed, we are both same aged brown guys, going to same college who like to workout. so there is this
    unspoken sense of comfort and common grounds. Based on that, a simple question should've been easy to communicate. But it was something very awkward for me, since I continued my cardio for another 5 mins, with me being in the corner. The point is, guys should be little more comfortable when they talk to each other in public.