Some of my writing

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 28, 2014 6:37 AM GMT
    Didn't wanna post from my novel so I went to some of my poems.
    Open for any comments

    Promises

    A pact between men ?
    What makes a promise ?
    Promised that I was the One, Where did the others come from?
    You told me you'd love me forever,
    Is that what you promised to them?
    A man's word is his bond.. So less than a man you are?
    Promised to protect my heart And dropped it..found it old These promises what are they worth?
    The tears we shed when they break?
    Or trust that's wagered with faith?
    A story told to a fool A Promise indeed
    Oh next love don't feed me promises I've grown so tired of there taste
  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Jan 28, 2014 6:54 AM GMT
    I can't comment on your poetry because I have never understood poetry.

    I'd love to read a few paragraphs of your novel, though.
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    Jan 28, 2014 7:06 AM GMT
    Hero

    Left me an empty shell
    Less than the man I once was
    Too weak to stop the tears
    I need my hero
    Lost in what we had
    You took all my love
    My shattered heart
    Mourning our love
    While you celebrated your freedom
    As I put pieces together
    You built walls with others
    But I don't need super- man anymore
    I'm not dying without you
    You want to fly to my rescue now?
    Kryptonite shard filled my heart
    A man who can change the world
    No more broken boy am I
    Lost in my darkness you are now
    Pieces of my heart are still there
    Tread carefully in the darkness, Cause superman won't save you
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    Jan 28, 2014 11:06 AM GMT
    idvo1x.jpg

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    Jan 28, 2014 11:50 AM GMT
    Webster666 saidI can't comment on your poetry because I have never understood poetry.

    I'd love to read a few paragraphs of your novel, though.
    If you have to analyze poetry, to me, that's doing it wrong.
    It always bothered me when my Writer's Craft teacher tried to get us to "understand" the intended meaning of poetic works like "The Listeners".
    I wanted to interpret that poem on my own terms. His perception ruined it for me, forever.

    The best poem I ever heard was written by a Canadian named E.J. Pratt.

    "It took the sea a thousand years, A thousand years to trace
    The granite features of this cliff, In crag and scarp and base.

    It took the sea an hour one night,
    An hour of storm to place
    The sculpture of these granite seams
    Upon a woman's face."

    Truly remarkable, and tragic, especially upon learning just who E.J. Pratt was and what he did for a living.

    Poetry is less about meaning, and more about who wrote it, and why. At least in my opinion.
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    Jan 28, 2014 7:38 PM GMT
    Ajjax saidIf you have to analyze poetry, to me, that's doing it wrong.



    The rhetoric of poetry is codified and layered, most of the greatest poetry ever written has much deeper and specific meaning than can be superficially gleaned.