Friends you just sleep with.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 30, 2014 5:28 AM GMT
    Do you have friends you occassionally have sleep over, cuddle with, but you don't have sex?
  • whytehot

    Posts: 1167

    Jan 30, 2014 6:08 AM GMT
    Only straight friends or girls. Otherwise it's too weird.
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    Jan 30, 2014 6:10 AM GMT
    Yes. Oh, it's not as if we never have sex, but usually just cuddle/sleep.
  • Oliv3

    Posts: 5

    Jan 30, 2014 7:26 AM GMT
    I used to sleep with my male best friend all time, then he told me it was weird, and that was before telling him I was gay.

    It was a good time and I love him more than any person in this world, not as a lover, I just love him.
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    Jan 30, 2014 1:26 PM GMT
    I have had some good friends, straight and gay, who were/are comfortable sleeping in bed and even some cuddling, not sexual with kissing, but physical contact, holding, hugging, resting heads or bodies against each other, etc. I find that male physical contact, with either a spoken or unspoken understanding there will be no sex, to be really nice. A lot of this happens when you're a kid, or sometimes in dominantly male environments like sports teams and military, but everything gets sexualized later. Yes, I have gotten a woody too, but knowing there's no point gets me past that, lol.
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    Jan 30, 2014 4:04 PM GMT
    Nope, but I wouldn't mind getting some
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    Jan 30, 2014 4:09 PM GMT
    I've had this once in life, guy would sleep over Fri-Sun and we would just cuddle and watch movies lol and sleep..a nap partner is also a great thing..you get so refreshed
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    Jan 30, 2014 5:10 PM GMT
    I had a straight buddy whom I knew back in Uni. I was pretty sure he was a little curious but we never kissed or did anything remotely boner inducing (ok maybe there were boner inducing that we probably took a blind eye to)
    We just chilled around , smoked joints , play video games and then cuddle around and talk about everything.

    He just wanted to be in a safe environment and I never took advantage of that.
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    Jan 31, 2014 4:33 AM GMT
    When I was younger, the idea of a 'homosexual' was exotic. We thought it had to be rare, confined to New York or big cities, certainly no one we knew, or in our town we thought. Well maybe that really effeminate kid in the high heeled shoes, lol. But you could spot one from a mile away right? I didn't know what caused the feelings I was having, but it couldn't be that! So even in college, I had friends that would climb into bed and talk or watch TV or sleep. Even if I might have had some feelings, I never would have thought they did too. And on and off I have had close friends like that. Now things are different, everyone is more aware, and everything is more sexualized. Now simple closeness or any touching is suspect. Too bad!
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    Jan 31, 2014 4:43 AM GMT
    Fivealive saidI had a straight buddy whom I knew back in Uni. I was pretty sure he was a little curious but we never kissed or did anything remotely boner inducing (ok maybe there were boner inducing that we probably took a blind eye to)
    We just chilled around , smoked joints , play video games and then cuddle around and talk about everything.

    He just wanted to be in a safe environment and I never took advantage of that.

    I like this answer a lot. Few of us have the character to resist taking advantage when we have the opportunity.

    Cuddle Buddies are a great idea. Let's lobby RJ to add a checkbox. icon_wink.gif

    I've had first dates where we agreed there would be no sex, only cuddling. It's lovely.

    Boners are inevitable. We're healthy young men, aren't we? But they can always be relieved privately -- or on the second date.
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    Jan 31, 2014 9:18 AM GMT
    YourName2000 saidTouch is so important. We've pretty much weened it out of today's Western society, especially for men. But like dogs, cats, and pretty much every other social animal, we have very positive physiological reactions to being touched. And people who are touched less are more likely to fall into depression. So seek out touch --hugs, touches, or better yet cuddling--wherever you can get it. Sure, it's easy to conflate it for sexual foreplay, but just appreciate it on its own for what it is and try and get more of it. icon_smile.gif

    http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20131014-the-touching-moments-we-all-need

    http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-mind-body-connection/201309/why-we-all-need-touch-and-be-touched


    U got it bro. Imagine a hugging orgy . . .
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 31, 2014 9:19 AM GMT
    I am not a big fan of touch, especially with some stranger.
    Unless I am affectionate towards someone, I won't involve myself in touching.
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    Jan 31, 2014 12:45 PM GMT
    whytehot saidOnly straight friends or girls. Otherwise it's too weird.


    This made me lol pretty hard. because only a gay man would say this. you'd never hear a straight guy say something in similar fashion, "only gay friends or guys. otherwise it's too weird." haha
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    Jan 31, 2014 12:59 PM GMT
    God, no! Eventually, all that cuddling and kissing will turn into emotions.
  • Splendidus_1

    Posts: 611

    Jan 31, 2014 10:34 PM GMT
    Cuddle orgies will become a thing.
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    Jan 31, 2014 10:38 PM GMT
    Ah, no.

    In the past, I've even reframed from cuddling with guys I did have sex with. I know it's different for everyone but cuddling for me is far more personal and closer then sex so I won't cuddle with just anybody who happens to be in the same bed or hot or someone who I decided to mess around with. If I'm cuddling with you, you can be damned sure it's because I like you. A lot.

    I grew up in a pretty reserved household (for which I don't judge or mind) where we didn't really touch each other. My sisters gave me a handshake when I graduated. We just aren't that type of family. We don't need to hug and kiss - it's just awkward for the 5 (6 now...) of us.
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    Jan 31, 2014 10:47 PM GMT
    No, not really, cuddling, sleep over, dry-humping lol, those are intimate things I only do with my ex-bfs. I don't do that to friends.
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    Feb 01, 2014 5:05 AM GMT
    I had a friend several years ago and we used to have sleepovers(strictly platonic) that lasted for a couple years. It ended when he moved away. It was more of a pyjama party 6yr olds would have.

    He is very extroverted and could not handle being alone. Myself an introvert, it was some just some friendly companionship on a personal level.

    A delicate balance but certainly manageable.