Texting ex

  • jnick91776

    Posts: 30

    Feb 04, 2014 10:04 PM GMT
    My ex and I split up a few weeks back because he wanted something different. He wanted to start seeing other guys. He is seeing someone now. But we keep texting everyday. Does this mean he is still interested in me or am I reading to much into it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 04, 2014 10:12 PM GMT
    I would stop the texting. Don't let him manipulate your emotions, or make you believe he still wants you. He probably still loves you but has decided to try something else..don't let yourself become his second option
  • jnick91776

    Posts: 30

    Feb 04, 2014 10:33 PM GMT
    He also said he wanted to be single. But now he is seeing someone. I just find it weird that after 4 yeas he didn't talk to me to see if we can work something out, whatever that would of been. Don't most people do that? And don't most people give it a second try?
    I'm just hurting now that's why all the questions.
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    Feb 04, 2014 11:08 PM GMT
    _Behemoth_ saidI would stop the texting. Don't let him manipulate your emotions, or make you believe he still wants you. He probably still loves you but has decided to try something else..don't let yourself become his second option


    +1


    OP, it is best not to text or be in contact now.

    If he wants, he will come back and beg you on his knees.... Otherwise you are hurting yourself now..
    And I feel you, man, it is tough icon_sad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 05, 2014 1:44 AM GMT
    Seems like you're an option to him. Don't waste your unlimited text messages.
  • highforthis

    Posts: 681

    Feb 05, 2014 2:54 AM GMT
    jnick91776 saidHe also said he wanted to be single. But now he is seeing someone. I just find it weird that after 4 yeas he didn't talk to me to see if we can work something out, whatever that would of been. Don't most people do that? And don't most people give it a second try?
    I'm just hurting now that's why all the questions.


    4 year relationship and he found a new guy weeks after splitting up??
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    Feb 05, 2014 3:23 AM GMT
    Agree w everyone above, you deserve better than to be someone's option, or back up plan. I'm kinda in the same scenario but have been single for over a year so it's a lot easier for me to not give in. That and I hit the gym since we split and he hit the kitchen icon_biggrin.gif
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    Feb 05, 2014 5:48 PM GMT
    jnick91776 saidHe also said he wanted to be single. But now he is seeing someone. I just find it weird that after 4 yeas he didn't talk to me to see if we can work something out, whatever that would of been. Don't most people do that? And don't most people give it a second try?
    I'm just hurting now that's why all the questions.

    Most people?? Everyone is unique - there is no answer for "most people." Sorry to hear you are hurting- all breakups are bad, especially after a couple years. I would advise you (as others did) to move on. He's not really available. If you want to feel better sooner, cut off contact with him entirely. Get on with your life. He is getting on with his. If you want to relate to him as a friend in the future, best to wait a long time first - 6 months to a year, so you no longer have longing for him.
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    Feb 05, 2014 5:58 PM GMT
    sounds like a douche to move on after a 4 year relationship so fast.. stop texting him because u deserve more than that. Don't indulge back in texting him no matter how much u want to.. i dont think its healthy to talk to ur ex because it jus makes it harder to get over them, wen they have obviously moved on to someone else while trying to cling on to u as a "Friend" or "backup"... think about it.. if someone is able to move on that fast after ur relationship with him.. wud u realli wanna be back in a relationship with someone like that?? that doesnt treasure wat u guys had? i wudnt go back to them even if they begged.. icon_twisted.gif
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    Feb 05, 2014 6:01 PM GMT
    From what I can gather from the OP, you broke up because he wanted to be single. Then he just comes crawling back after all this time (4 years? WTF) wanting to talk??? If I was you I would forget about him, he thinks that he can simply throw your feelings to one side, obviously a selfish ****, it appears he thinks that you will just be there when he wants to call. That is not the basis for a good relationship.

    Furthermore, you said that he already has a new partner. What, is he going to start two timing him? Red warning lights should be flashing at this point! If he's willing to cheat on his present partner now, what makes you think he wouldn't do that to you? I know this comes across as harsh but you have obviously had a rough time with this guy and your feelings don't need to be mauled again by him. Take my advice and find a guy that will actually love you, he's there somewhere. Good Luck!
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    Feb 05, 2014 6:06 PM GMT
    He hasn't moved on yet.

    The real question is, have you moved on?

    If yes, then stop replying to him.
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    Feb 05, 2014 6:11 PM GMT
    It sounds to me like he wants to have his cake and eat it too. At this rate he knows he can come back at any time and you will welcome it.

    You need to decide if you believe you are worth more than that or not.
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    Feb 05, 2014 10:32 PM GMT
    Several guys said it! He wants you to be on the back end booty call. I'd stop talking to him in about 3-4 months until you feel normal and yourself again. Hang out with friends and meet other people.


  • hebrewman

    Posts: 1367

    Feb 05, 2014 10:43 PM GMT
    I cannot emphasize this enough. END IT AN END IT NOW. he has no right whatsoever to reenter your life like this. he is the one that ended it in search of "greener pastures". no. absolutely not. when Phil and I finally have distance between us, and should he try to begin a text relationship, I cannot wait to tell him to fuck off. not after ending an 18 year relationship in an email. no how, no way. you MUST do the same. otherwise, he will continue this shit. put a stop to it now. for your own peace of mind.
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4435

    Feb 05, 2014 10:45 PM GMT
    Sounds like after four years he got horny for some guy and ditched you. He may be having second thoughts but until he figures out what he wants, stop all communication. You work on making you right. The best way I know to start that process is go out and have a purely sex date. That helps clear the mind. Remember, the only reason you should ever consider taking him back is if you truly love him above all others and he loves you above all others.
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    Feb 06, 2014 12:02 AM GMT
    Text him that you would like to get gay married to him, mostly cause he's like, all mature and stuff, and then wait for the return text, cause, like, you know, it's gonna be super amazing. Right?
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    Feb 06, 2014 12:06 AM GMT
    I also think you should end it. Some people need closure. If so, ask to talk publicly like at a park or something. Get your side in. Maybe ask him why now? After he gets a chance to talk, break things off. I feel like you should literally say that you shouldn't talk anymore.
  • hdurdinr

    Posts: 699

    Feb 06, 2014 12:10 AM GMT
    First of all, sorry about your break up icon_sad.gif
    But I too will tell you to stop texting your ex. By not messaging him you're suddenly not available and he won't be able to use you. To be honest it sounds like you're better off out of it if this his what he does after four years of being together but I don't know your story. Anyway, look after yourself and hang out with your friends as much as possible!