Straighten up the house plan of action?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 18, 2008 6:24 PM GMT
    A friend of mines father recently passed unexpectedly. She was in charge of going to his home and getting things in order after his death. She was mortified to find photos of her straight father in various forms of women’s clothing and using sex toys on himself.

    She asked me if she thought she should tell her siblings. I said “HELL NO…just destroy the pics and try to forget about it.” I also told her to go through the computer files before giving the computer away.

    I am openly gay to my family but I still would not want them to go into my home and find my porn etc. My partner and I now have a friend with a key to the house with orders to make that stuff disappear if something happens to us.

    Do you have a back-up plan to “straighten up” the house?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 18, 2008 6:41 PM GMT
    1. Concur, don't inform his other children. Unlikely it was something he wanted them to know about, the one daughter having only inadvertently learned about it by this turn of events. Preserve his privacy & dignity in all things.

    2. A good suggestion about cleaning the house. The best approach with computers is totally reformatting the hard drive, since individual files may be overlooked in a selective "search & destroy" operation.

    We each have total legal authority over our estates & inheritance rights should one predecease the other, but I hadn't thought about a situation where we both die simultaneously, like a car accident or plane crash. I will talk to our attorney about that, whom I believe assumes that authority already, but doesn't have specific instructions to clean out the computers. We really have nothing else that might shock straight family.

    Thanks! Good ideas!
  • Sparkycat

    Posts: 1064

    Dec 18, 2008 7:31 PM GMT
    Don't just reformat the drive. Either replace it or use one of those programs that erases the drive so that no files can be recovered.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 18, 2008 7:42 PM GMT
    lmao!! my best friend at work and I were just talkin about this the other day!! he told me if anything ever happened i have to get in his condo before his sister does and get rid of all the porn and toys!! DAM Id probably need a uhaul truck! haha

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 18, 2008 7:47 PM GMT
    Hah... I was cleaning out the porch of my grandparents house, after grandpa passed. The shelf full of paperback westerns turned out to be XXX Westerns! Apparently it's a whole genre that I knew nothing about.
    Whatever. Everyone's human.

    Maybe I'll tape a funny letter inside the lid of my toybox, bequeathing them to whoever finds them. With detailed instructions...
  • zakariahzol

    Posts: 2241

    Dec 18, 2008 9:00 PM GMT
    I dont care what they find out when I am dead. There some evidence of me being gay in my house , some gay porn but I also got a lot more straight porn. So probably they have to come up with thier own conclusion about my sexuality. Anyway, even when I am still alive , I believe they suspect anyway. I not married, never have a girlfriends , I was effiminate as a kids,
    kinda tell them somethings right.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 18, 2008 9:09 PM GMT
    I couldn't give a crap, I'll be dead, its not like I'm going to get embarrassed.

    Actually, except for the sexual photos, my sisters would probably come into my house and start having a good giggle icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 18, 2008 9:59 PM GMT
    The man is dead, so this isn't about what he wants. How would his surviving friends and family take it? With consideration to them, I would just get rid of the incriminating evidence.

    However, I recognize the worth of a killer story like this. When you are out of town traveling, be sure to regale a bar full of strangers with this bizarre tale.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 18, 2008 10:53 PM GMT
    Everyone has secrets. It reminds us we're all just humans. Transvestism isn't really indicative of being gay anyway.

    I also suggest just destroying the hard drive. There are file recovery programs that can piece together 'deleted' files.