Guys that won't take no

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 09, 2014 9:02 PM GMT
    Met this guy on Grindr a few months back. We've been chatting quite a bit and have met up for coffee (strictly friends. I'm dating, plus I don't fancy him anyway).

    He messages me non stop about everything, and it's sending me up the wall:


    How are you?
    Just got up
    Just getting ready to go out
    Should I wear [insert outfit here]?
    Out now
    Coming home now
    Home at last
    How's you?
    I'm eating my dinner now
    ... icon_confused.gif

    You get the picture!

    Sorry, just needed to rant somewhere basically. I bet most on here have come across someone similar before now?
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    Feb 09, 2014 9:04 PM GMT
    I'd guess that he's infatuated with you. Just answer about a half of his texts, then a third, etc. He'll get the message.
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    Feb 09, 2014 9:13 PM GMT
    I did once. The guy kept e-mailing, even after I said no. So I let him know, that fine I'll sleep with you, but it's gonna cost you (which I was not for real, just wanted to annoy him somehow), since I am not attracted to you. He got so pissed off, and said there are plenty of guy out there like you, dime a dozen, etc etc....you get the picture.
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    Feb 09, 2014 9:17 PM GMT
    This must be a thing with the younger crowd. It seems they need constant chatter. I see this a lot in the gay apps. Just a bunch of guys looking for pen pals or texting buddies.
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    Feb 09, 2014 9:20 PM GMT
    xrichx saidThis must be a thing with the younger crowd. It seems they need constant chatter. I see this a lot in the gay apps. Just a bunch of guys looking for pen pals or texting buddies.

    ugh so true.
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    Feb 09, 2014 9:26 PM GMT
    Jlor31 saidMet this guy on Grindr a few months back. We've been chatting quite a bit and have met up for coffee (strictly friends. I'm dating, plus I don't fancy him anyway).

    He messages me non stop about everything, and it's sending me up the wall:


    How are you?
    Just got up
    Just getting ready to go out
    Should I wear [insert outfit here]?
    Out now
    Coming home now
    Home at last
    How's you?
    I'm eating my dinner now
    ... icon_confused.gif

    You get the picture!

    Sorry, just needed to rant somewhere basically. I bet most on here have come across someone similar before now?


    So then, what did you tell him?
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Feb 09, 2014 9:27 PM GMT
    Next time tell them you have text disabled as you feel if someone needs to touch base with you they can call.
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    Feb 09, 2014 9:37 PM GMT
    You didn't say what you want from him.
    If you want to stay friends, tell him so but add he can't text you that often since you have a boyfriend.
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    Feb 09, 2014 9:39 PM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidNext time tell them you have text disabled as you feel if someone needs to touch base with you they can call.


    You can do that???
    Oh hell...
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    Feb 09, 2014 9:44 PM GMT
    I'm always scared of becoming one of those guys.. it Really has nothing to do with age.. I've met crazy older guys who are similar

    What I do it limit myself with the messages over a certain amount of time then stop messaging them if they ignore me...

    Soooo that said.. you should cut back messaging him but don't be rude to him..

    I'm no help..
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    Feb 10, 2014 7:59 AM GMT
    I've taken to responding to only half his messages now, so we'll see.
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    Feb 10, 2014 8:25 AM GMT
    Delete your grindr you're Dating now. Problem solved icon_smile.gif
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    Feb 10, 2014 8:36 AM GMT
    OMG! These are the things they all would tell me whoever I am talking to. That's pathetic isn't ?
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    Feb 10, 2014 1:58 PM GMT
    Jlor31 saidI've taken to responding to only half his messages now, so we'll see.


    So instead of telling him the truth, you decided to continue to respond. And now, you must be 1/2 annoyed.
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    Feb 10, 2014 4:09 PM GMT
    ^He knows the score. I've told him several times that we're friends, and friends only. I don't want to be downright cruel, I just wish he'd back off a bit.

    As for dating anyway, I don't know what's going on any more, but that's for another thread icon_wink.gif
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    Feb 10, 2014 4:49 PM GMT
    Jlor31 said^He knows the score. I've told him several times that we're friends, and friends only. I don't want to be downright cruel, I just wish he'd back off a bit.

    As for dating anyway, I don't know what's going on any more, but that's for another thread icon_wink.gif


    . . For the life of me, can't figure out what

    . .Just getting ready to go out
    . .Should I wear [insert outfit here]?
    . .Out now
    . .Coming home now
    . .I'm eating my dinner now...


    have to do with dating. Even if you were into him, why would you want to know this stuff?
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    Feb 10, 2014 6:23 PM GMT
    Why don't you block him?
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    Feb 10, 2014 8:47 PM GMT
    Jlor31 said^He knows the score. I've told him several times that we're friends, and friends only. I don't want to be downright cruel, I just wish he'd back off a bit.

    As for dating anyway, I don't know what's going on any more, but that's for another thread icon_wink.gif

    It sounds like he really is looking for a friend so just be up front with him and say, dude, you're texting me too much. I can't have my phone going off all the time. I like chatting on occasion but you need to keep it to a minimum if you want to continue to remain in touch.

    Doesn't sound like he's purposely being annoying or anything, he sounds more lonely than anything. He clearly has enjoyed getting to know you regardless of whether he stands a chance at getting laid or not!
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    Feb 11, 2014 8:28 AM GMT
    eb925guy said
    Jlor31 said^He knows the score. I've told him several times that we're friends, and friends only. I don't want to be downright cruel, I just wish he'd back off a bit.

    As for dating anyway, I don't know what's going on any more, but that's for another thread icon_wink.gif

    It sounds like he really is looking for a friend so just be up front with him and say, dude, you're texting me too much. I can't have my phone going off all the time. I like chatting on occasion but you need to keep it to a minimum if you want to continue to remain in touch.

    Doesn't sound like he's purposely being annoying or anything, he sounds more lonely than anything. He clearly has enjoyed getting to know you regardless of whether he stands a chance at getting laid or not!


    I'll try that. He does come across as lonely. I get the impression that people (especially gay guys) take advantage of him as well.