ACCURATE(BIASED TOO) 2014 BASEBALL PREDICTIONS!

  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Feb 14, 2014 1:22 AM GMT
    Spring Training has started for some Major League Baseball teams, with things getting into full swing in the next few days. So....how about some predictions?

    AL EAST:

    The toughest, nastiest, most stressful division in all of baseball....

    1. TAMPA BAY RAYS. Yeah, I said "biased," didn't I. The Rays are MY team and they do look very strong going into the 2014 season. Best pitching staff in all of baseball. Best manager (Joe Maddon). Best young organization. Awesome minor league system. Stadium sucks and the fans don't show! Still, watch this team all year guys. You know who David Price and Evan Longoria are, but remember the names Alex Cobb, Wil Myers, Ben Zobrist, Matt Moore and Grant Balfour. These guys are really, really good.

    2. BOSTON WHATEVERS. David Ortiz and Dustin Pedroia make me nervous, but the rest of the team can be pitched around or not too difficult to get out. They will get a Wild Card spot but will not win the division.

    3. NEW YORK MONEY SPENDERS. They flash the cash. Get top talent. Top talent gets hurt. Pitching stinks. Bullpen is a huge question mark with the retirement of Mariano Rivera. A-Rod sits out the season (in Miami more than likely buying up lavish homes) and a true class act, Derek Jeter, says he'll hang it up after 2014.

    4. TORONTO BLOW JAYS. Before the 2013 season, the Jays acquired a lot of big name talent. Sports writers and those with crystal balls dubbed them World Series Champions. They sucked coming out of the gate and finished dead last. Edwin Encarnacion and Jose Baustista are damn good players (Rays killers), but they can't carry this squad and their pitching is just as bad as the Money Spenders.

    5. BALTIMORE BIRD DROPPINGS. The only thing they have is Chris Davis and he is effin hawt. That man is THE cure for ED. Check him out. Adam Jones is an excellent outfielder and would likely be happier playing for a better team. Without Davis and Jones, the 2013 Houston Astros are world beaters. The Droppings pitching is SO bad, they couldn't get out a lineup featuring me, Southbeach1500 and Art_Deco!


    The rest:

    AL Central

    1. Detroit Wheels
    2. Kansas City Steaks
    3. Cleveland Native Americans
    4. Minnesota Twinkies
    5. Chicago Whitewashers

    AL West

    1. Oakland Bomber Jocks (this is a damn good team)
    2. Seattle Following in the 'Hawks Footsteps
    3. Texas Ted Cruz Cruisers
    4. LA/Anaheim/Irvine/Long Beach Hell's Angels
    5. Houston Caboose

    NL East

    1. Washington National League Champions
    2. Atlanta Panic-Over-An-Inch-Of-Snow
    3. New York Queens
    4. Philadelphia Boner-Giving-Cole-Hamels
    5. Miami Dead Fish On The Beach

    NL Central

    1. St. Louis Angry Birds (they are good too)
    2. Pittsburgh Butt Pirates
    3. Cincinnati OMG-Jay Bruce's
    4. Milwaukee Beer Pongs
    5. Chicago Flubs

    NL West

    1. San Francisco Giant Schlongs (Buster Posey---ohhhh)
    2. LA West Coast Moneyspenders
    3. Arizona D-Bags
    4. Colorado Rock Hards
    5. San Diego Petcos

    World Series? Rays versus Nationals. Rays in 6 games.
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Feb 20, 2014 10:55 PM GMT
    Hmmmmm.....I suppose there is agreement all around with these fearless predictions of Rays dominance until the end of time.

    Glad you agree!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 21, 2014 2:02 AM GMT
    texas-rangers-1-sign.jpg

    Texas wins it all against the Nationals. Nationals fans still claim it as D.C. victory since Texas was once the Washington Senators. In the 2015 season the Nats change the name to Senators and in 2016 the new Senator team moves to Austin TX. In 2017 the Austin State Senators win it all...

    Sidenote: Rangers gave Cruz's number to Chooooooo. He is only welcome back at a bargain basement price.
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Feb 23, 2014 2:41 AM GMT
    Anyone else want to weigh in? Spring Training games are right around the corner......
  • noshirt4me

    Posts: 32

    Feb 23, 2014 2:56 AM GMT
    lets go Oakland!!!
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Feb 23, 2014 3:15 AM GMT
    noshirt4me saidlets go Oakland!!!


    Oakland IS good, however, Aussie bid goodbye and came back to the Rays! Woo Hoo!
  • noshirt4me

    Posts: 32

    Feb 23, 2014 3:30 AM GMT
    yeah but I think we got the best of him...most don't unpack here for long :-0
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Feb 23, 2014 3:56 AM GMT
    turtleneckjock said
    5. BALTIMORE BIRD DROPPINGS. The only thing they have is Chris Davis and he is effin hawt. That man is THE cure for ED. Check him out. Adam Jones is an excellent outfielder and would likely be happier playing for a better team. Without Davis and Jones, the 2013 Houston Astros are world beaters. The Droppings pitching is SO bad, they couldn't get out a lineup featuring me, Southbeach1500 and Art_Deco!


    As an Orioles fan, I don't resent this at all. They absolutely failed to address their pitching problem. And they let go their must clutch player, Nate McClouth.

    And yes about Chris Davis!
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Feb 23, 2014 5:00 AM GMT
    For those wondering about Chris Davis....

    76638956.jpg

    wpid-chris_davis_baltimore_orioles_photo

    ...he melts my popsicle!
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Feb 23, 2014 5:13 AM GMT
    Prepare yourself...

    8265350.jpg
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Feb 23, 2014 5:16 AM GMT
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    OMG....."Fap..fap...fapfapfap...."

    Serious "fappage" that man is!
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Feb 23, 2014 5:16 AM GMT
    ChrisDavisChimp.png

    Look at those arms!
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Feb 23, 2014 5:18 AM GMT
    8265354.jpg
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Feb 23, 2014 5:23 AM GMT
    Those arms.
    That bulge.

    I'm WET now! LOL!

    (Is that the O's closer he's holding...?)

    Chris Davis just hijacked the thread. LOVE!
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Feb 23, 2014 5:27 AM GMT
    turtleneckjock said
    (Is that the O's closer he's holding...?)


    No. They don't have one.
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Mar 06, 2014 3:00 PM GMT
    Things are heating up in Spring Training so far. Rays look really GOOD! Chris Archer pitched well the other day and I noticed the predictions of the Rays and Red Sox fighting it out for the AL East title. Weigh in, guys!

    For me, I'm heading over to Viera to see the Nationals play Detroit in a couple of weeks.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 12, 2014 9:18 PM GMT
    I'm bumping just for the brilliant team names!

    (And the predictions ain't so bad, either!) icon_razz.gif
  • safety43_mma1...

    Posts: 4251

    Mar 12, 2014 9:27 PM GMT
    To be honest who cares it's baseball. I never got into this sport and with all the roids it makes my opinion even more valid.
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Mar 23, 2014 11:32 PM GMT
    dayumm saidI'm bumping just for the brilliant team names!

    (And the predictions ain't so bad, either!) icon_razz.gif


    Thank you! Those just came of the top of my head that day!!
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Mar 23, 2014 11:45 PM GMT
    Spring Training wrap up time and didn't I tell you.....The RAYS look really good going into next week's opener with the Blow Jays. Rays have had a good spring and despite fielding trade rumors the past few months, David Price has had an outstanding preseason. C'mon Rays fans! Pack that ballpark! Let's keep Price for a long, long time!

    And....The Money Spenders thought they would be all haughty and full of themselves by throwing big bucks at often-injured Jacoby Ellsbury, prying him away from the Whatevers. Guess what? Ellsbury hurt his ankle, has a toothache or pink eye...or something...that has kept him out of the lineup. Now everyone is ragging on the Money Spenders because their team is so old and injury prone. This keeps up, their position players are all gonna end up on the disabled list (maybe even for pink eye), but like I said...their pitching stinks! It reeks! Not gonna be a happy summer in the Bronx when the Houston Caboose looks like a better team....

    Finally....took in a spring training game myself a few days ago. Nice drive over to Viera to see the Washington National League Champions play the Detroit Wheels. The Wheels fell off for the Wheels as the Washington bopped 'em 8-1.

    While I was flirting with Ryan Zimmerman, Bryce Harper pinched me on the ass. To make a long story short, I ended up in a cheap motel in Melbourne and was DP'd by both Harper and Zimmerman.

    (just seeing if you are paying attention...)

  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Mar 25, 2014 12:13 AM GMT
    mlb-com-boss.png

    I had to throw in ONE more Chris Davis pic! LOL!
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Mar 26, 2014 1:18 AM GMT
    I have the 2014 Orioles calendar featuring players with their pets. Guess who's Mr. April?

    920
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Mar 26, 2014 1:22 AM GMT
    If you are interested in joining this year's RJ Fantasy Baseball League, please express your interest here: http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/3744016
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Mar 26, 2014 1:35 AM GMT
    Thanks for posting "Mr. April," coolarmydude...and I know the bulldog isn't the only one going "WOOF!"
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Mar 26, 2014 1:43 AM GMT
    chris-davis-2014.jpg?w=600