LGBT needs to sort out its own prejudices before demanding it from others

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 18, 2014 5:21 PM GMT
    I've always known about the prejudices shown against bisexuals from WITHIN the gay community. Why can't we just choose a side? why do we have to be greedy? The irony is lost on these people, who'd have a hissy fit if someone told them to defy their nature and "just be straight".

    But now I've encountered a new group of bigot within the gay community: racists. Holy crap. I don't know how these guys couldn't tell I'm not white, I dont exactly hide it in my profile, yet we'll be chatting and they'd lose interest when they realise I'm Indian?

    I'm not upset about the rejection (from guys who approached me first), it just makes me sad knowing that the LGBT is so far away from overcoming prejudices and bigotry. look at any forum post dealing with a gay man and his religion, the level of intolerance is disappointing.

    I'm not trying to get on anyone's toes here, but we have alot of work to do.
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Feb 18, 2014 7:09 PM GMT
    Interesting. I don't see any 'men of color' on your hot list -- and that certainly isn't because RJ lacks them.
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    Feb 18, 2014 7:13 PM GMT
    there are, but interesting that you'd go there
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Feb 18, 2014 7:33 PM GMT
    cptnerd saidthere are, but interesting that you'd go there

    how so? just curious if you keep your own council.

    Prejudice (in its myriad forms) is a universal human problem, not something unique to LGBT. Logically one might think that LGBT people would be more tolerant and less prejudiced and, indeed, statistically this might even be true to some extent.

    But the fact is LGBT is made up of individual people from all over the world with their own class, race, ethnicity, religion, political party, level of education, degree of cultural sophistication and so on. There is no LGBT club, religion or political party with an appointed or elected group of leaders that can dictate acceptable attitudes or platforms that everyone must adhere to to be a "member".

    Here on RJ, we all self-identify as gay or bisexual men, but *that* is just about the only thing we all have in common (and there are exceptions even within that). So appeals to the individual to be more tolerant, less prejudiced and etc., make sense. But addressing the LGBT as if it were some monolithic organization is misguided.
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    Feb 18, 2014 7:43 PM GMT
    you're trying to accuse me of not finding non-white guys hot, which lead me to the ridiculous task of actually counting the races of those I've hot listed. if i only ever hot list guys in my area, how is it unreasonable that the majority happen to be white? I think it says more about you than me that you're making an issue out of it...

    I'm sorry if you interpretted my post as an attack on the entire gay community.. it most certainly was not meant as such. but to deny that prejudices exist from within only stops us from moving forward.
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Feb 18, 2014 7:51 PM GMT
    cptnerd said...to deny that prejudices exist from within only stops us from moving forward.

    It most certainly DOES exist.

    But, again, this is a person by person observation. Not saying that to excuse it but just to say, it is what it is.

    My politics are WAY left of center and it blows my mind that there are such things as "gay Republicans" (an oxymoron to my mind). But there are and avid ones. There are members here who are adamantly and outspokenly racist. But this isn't *because* they self identify as gay or bi or whatever.
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    Feb 18, 2014 7:57 PM GMT
    MikeW said
    cptnerd said...to deny that prejudices exist from within only stops us from moving forward.

    It most certainly DOES exist.

    But, again, this is a person by person observation. Not saying that to excuse it but just to say, it is what it is.

    My politics are WAY left of center and it blows my mind that there are such things as "gay Republicans" (an oxymoron to my mind). But there are and avid ones. There are members here who are adamantly and outspokenly racist. But this isn't *because* they self identify as gay or bi or whatever.


    glad we eventually ended up on the ssame page icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 19, 2014 11:38 AM GMT
    It isn't something new that you have just discovered. There are threads over threads that have been devoted to discuss this issue. Finally, no one had any solution to overcome that.
    So you just have to suck it up, and continue with your life.
    You aren't going to change anything by creating another thread which has already been discussed like zillion times.
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    Feb 19, 2014 12:30 PM GMT
    You have to separate out a preference for certain physical types from actual prejudice. Hairy vs smooth, thin vs fat, lean vs beefy. It might be true that a particular ethnic group falls within a physical type someone doesn't find attractive. That doesn't mean they are prejudiced. You seem to be saying guys find you attractive until they discover your ethnicity. That is just archaic in this world. By the way, I agree the LGBT community has cliquish subcultures that are reprehensible and which go beyond personal preferences and become concerted discriminatory movements, such as harassing bisexuals and political thugism. But most groups do. Gay men can just be more bitchy and shrill IMHO.