Am I a Bitch for doing this?

  • gjoseph

    Posts: 250

    Dec 21, 2008 9:03 PM GMT
    Okay, last weekend at one of the local clubs I went solo. A "sweet" guy basically sweet-talked to me and asked for my number and wanted me to "chill" with him. This is where the problem starts: He is not my type, I "sensed" he wanted to get in my pants didn't truly like me, told him we can just be friends. The next day he calls me...knowing that I don't like him I immediately block his number. He soon starts sending endless text messages so then I text him impersonating my friend "Ashley" saying Gerald likes this guy named Brock, etc. He then leaves me alone and I go on my merrily way thinking I will never see this guy again.

    Worst nightmare occurred last night, I saw him!! He walks up to me as I'm in line to enter the club with his group of friends and starts getting very defensive. He tells me about my "friend" and how come I never called him. I soon dash inside and start talking to this really cute guy Jason. The guy who is mad at me sees me talking to Jason and immediately gives me the "Evil" eye -- like that I want you dead look and I immediately start apologizing. I didn't confess to the whole impersonation but I implied to him that I just want us to be friends. He says that he's just a tad bit upset and we soon go our separate ways and start having fun. What can I do to fix what I've done? Tell the entire truth? I've already have done this before this one guy and am about to do it again (Creepy 28yr old). I always try talking to everyone and I tell these guys from the get go I'm not interested. I guess a MAJOR mistake is giving guys my number when I'm not interested in them. Please help me!! All advice is greatly appreciated =)
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    Dec 21, 2008 9:07 PM GMT
    Advice: Don't worry about it. It's not your problem, and you owe no explanation.
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    Dec 21, 2008 9:18 PM GMT
    gjoseph said...I guess a MAJOR mistake is giving guys my number when I'm not interested in them. Please help me!! All advice is greatly appreciated =)


    You have already described your mistake. Hopefully we learn by our mistakes, and don't repeat them.

    If I understand this correctly, the only one with whom you've burnt your bridges is the guy you didn't want anyway. Now you move on.

    Is there a problem with Jason regarding this? If not, and Jason is your new interest, this is a non-problem. What needs to be "fixed?"
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    Dec 21, 2008 9:58 PM GMT
    Stop giving people your number. You're under no obligation to be anyone's friend if you think they have ulterior motives which most guys in clubs do.
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    Dec 21, 2008 10:45 PM GMT
    Really. Dont give your number out. When I go out and a guy hits on me, i respond with a "No thank you, Im with someone" and keep it moving.
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    Dec 21, 2008 11:08 PM GMT
    Yeah, don't give out your number. You aren't doing the guy any favours by making him think he has a chance with you.

    As with everything in life, honesty is the best policy.

    Some years ago I had a guy chasing me around the club everytime I went out, and eventually I just said, "look mate, I'm interested in someone else. I'm flattered that you like me, but it's not going to happen."

    Today, he is one of my closest friends.
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    Dec 21, 2008 11:13 PM GMT
    Easiest way out of that would be honesty. You don't have to be mean about it... just say that you are not interested and NEVER give your # to someone that you have no intrest in.
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    Dec 21, 2008 11:13 PM GMT
    Poor judgment. Next time do not give out your number and just tell the next guy. Thanks but NO THANKS! icon_biggrin.gif
  • gjoseph

    Posts: 250

    Dec 21, 2008 11:13 PM GMT
    Aww thanks you guys....I'll definitely will be careful about exchanging numbers to guys that I'm not interested in.

    Red_Vespa --- I didn't have any problems with Jason yet the problem is I didn't really know how to "flirt" with him.... we didn't even exchange numbers =(
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    Dec 21, 2008 11:27 PM GMT
    Yes it makes you a bitch. Why is it so hard to be honest?
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    Dec 21, 2008 11:40 PM GMT
    Jesus christ gay guys have so much drama I'm surprised there isn't a higher rate for strokes in the gay community!

    Grow a pair and tell him you're not interested! It doesn't mean you're a bitch, it means you stand up for yourself. It will make HIM a bitch if he can't stand that (and that's what we're aiming for, to not make you the bitch).
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    Dec 22, 2008 1:00 AM GMT
    Say: I don't like you. Fuck off.

    Seriously! Who the fuck is he that you're all twitters about it? Pfft, piss on 'im.



    P.S. My father always said I lacked tact and it'd get me killed... bring it on. icon_lol.gif
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    Dec 22, 2008 1:11 AM GMT
    *kills Buckwheet with elaborate flourishes of his katana and then feeds the chunks to his Shiba Inu*
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    Dec 22, 2008 1:14 AM GMT
    gjoseph said I guess a MAJOR mistake is giving guys my number when I'm not interested in them. Please help me!! All advice is greatly appreciated =)


    YA THINK? People can be cool and friend-material, so giving out your number isn't wrong, but if you've had more than one or two issues recently then you're not making yourself clear. Just say, "oh sorry, you're not my type." Generally, if a guy hears that he doesn't even want to ask for your number, so something isn't going right. You need to be clear with your words, and you shouldn't have this problem. As for your current issue, yes, the truth is the best way to resolve this.
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    Dec 22, 2008 1:21 AM GMT
    TheIStrat saidYes it makes you a bitch. Why is it so hard to be honest?


    OoooOOOoooO I likes you icon_biggrin.gif

    Buckwheet saidSay: I don't like you. Fuck off.

    Seriously! Who the fuck is he that you're all twitters about it? Pfft, piss on 'im.

    P.S. My father always said I lacked tact and it'd get me killed... bring it on. icon_lol.gif


    Will you have my babies? can they come knuckle hair free?
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    Dec 22, 2008 1:37 AM GMT
    Yeah in the future if you are not interested in a guy don't give him your number. Giving somebody your number is enabling them to communicate w/ you in the future. If that's not what you want then don't enable it. Sounds like the best way to get out of this one is to man up and tell him to his face. Running off to talk to another guy... That's a very bitchy way of saying bugger off. If the next time you see him you feel like he's giving you dirty looks face him and tell him. Be like look dude is there a problem because you keep looking at me like you poisoned my drink and you're waiting for me to fall out. Tell him, if you got something to say then say it but I'm not going to let stare me down like that. If he has any decency he'll start playing w/ his hair and be like what are you talking about. That should be the last you'll hear of him. If he's crazy he may want to fight you so you should be ready to throw your drink his his face then light him on fire. Good luck.
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    Dec 22, 2008 1:39 AM GMT
    Yeah, you brought that on yourself icon_smile.gif I can understand though...when I was younger I thought I was being nice giving my number to guys I really wasn't interested in seeing again. I just didn't want to be mean or hurt anyone's feelings in the middle of a club or bar. Now it's a different story...I've wised up and realized it's a waste of everyone's time and energy. I just say "I appreciate it but I'm not interested". Usually people look shocked in the face of honesty and sometimes they're nice about it...sometimes they're not but at least it's over.

    I think it would be best if everyone just waited for someone to give up their number if they want to. I've never asked any one for their phone number...always thought it was really rude. If someone wants to you to have their number they'll give it to you. I usually just write mine on a napkin and slip it in their pocket when they don't notice so if they ask I can just say you already have it icon_wink.gif
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    Dec 22, 2008 1:42 AM GMT
    Hahaha the napkin ninja strikes. Boy I wish I had some date rape drug right now. Oh yeah, you already have that too. May want to take a seat so you don't hit your head when you.... Good night lol.
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    Dec 22, 2008 1:51 AM GMT
    Ha.....Skank_Bait, if you can manage to get it in to my drink you'll have earned it. As you can see from my pics, my drink rarely leaves my hands icon_wink.gif It's a nervous energy thing...I always have to have something in my hand when I'm out.
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    Dec 22, 2008 3:07 AM GMT
    Why is it that you have to consider yourself a Bitch? Is that because you associate that with weakness, passivity, manipulation, assertiveness, brazenness, or some other descriptive. Me, I just hear a connotation of "women = bad" with that word when used as you did.

    That's my little hijacking of this thread.

    As for your behavior, I would say you were indirectly dismissive and probably would have been best not giving out your number.
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    Dec 23, 2008 5:55 AM GMT
    lilTanker said
    TheIStrat saidYes it makes you a bitch. Why is it so hard to be honest?


    OoooOOOoooO I likes you icon_biggrin.gif

    Buckwheet saidSay: I don't like you. Fuck off.

    Seriously! Who the fuck is he that you're all twitters about it? Pfft, piss on 'im.

    P.S. My father always said I lacked tact and it'd get me killed... bring it on. icon_lol.gif


    Will you have my babies? can they come knuckle hair free?


    Depends on what kind of tax credits I get after they squeeze out...

    oh that's fucked up LOL oh tahts funny icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif