Chubby guy as a partner?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 10:59 AM GMT
    Hey guys!
    Would any of you consider a chubby guy as your life partner?
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Feb 26, 2014 2:15 PM GMT
    well it depends on your definition of chubby. there are guys who are fat who consider themselves chubby. then there are guys who actually are chubby. i consider someone chubby someone who is little overweight and not very toned. anyhow, i would date a chubby guy. if he was masculine and a good kisser.
  • drakutis

    Posts: 586

    Feb 26, 2014 2:55 PM GMT
    tuffguyndc saidwell it depends on your definition of chubby. there are guys who are fat who consider themselves chubby. then there are guys who actually are chubby. i consider someone chubby someone who is little overweight and not very toned. anyhow, i would date a chubby guy. if he was masculine and a good kisser.


    A good kisser can do wonders!
  • Fable

    Posts: 3866

    Feb 26, 2014 4:08 PM GMT
    I would not take you as a life partner.


    leyomi-dips-o.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 4:23 PM GMT
    I've dated a fat guy before he was more than chubby, and I dated a fit guy whogot chubby during the relationship and is now fat. It's not the worst thing in the world. I like fit lads but it can be hard finding one who's worth much more than his abs .. and I can't deal with someone too egotistical lol
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    Feb 26, 2014 4:25 PM GMT
    I was windowshopping the other day on POF and I saw this one huskier guy who looked like a gentle giant. I wouldn't consider him my usual type but he had a really nice smile and I thought it was adorable

    sure, why not.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 4:26 PM GMT
    I think for most of us it depends on your definition of 'chubby' AND who the guy is 'inside'. Most of us view the outside package as our initial evaluation of a person because we have nothing else but once we actually meet the person, the exterior takes a back seat to who we see the person as based on his personality, attitude, intelligence, etc.

    For me personally, there are physical traits I find very attractive and if a person is on the heavier side, I'm OK with that if they're also hairy. If I met a chubby smooth guy and we really hit it off with many things in common and found each other easy to communicate with, would I consider more, absolutely.

    I'd want someone with some interest in keeping in some sort of good shape and to be healthy but they don't need to be a twig, I'm certainly not!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 4:28 PM GMT
    A few extra pounds? Sure. But not a baldo. Never. It's the sign of demonic possession. Word.
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    Feb 26, 2014 4:30 PM GMT
    qwas saidHey guys!
    Would any of you consider a chubby guy as your life partner?

    Looking at your profile, it looks like you're wanting to remain who you are and find someone that's willing to love you as is.

    You know you could meet the person half way but working to turn yourself into someone who's not overweight or as overweight and probably increase your chances of finding that guy you want AND becoming more healthy too. There's a motivation for you to improve your health and you're on a site where you can get a lot of support to do it.

    Now is the time, this is the place, yours is the choice!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 4:32 PM GMT
    Sharka_Khan saidA few extra pounds? Sure. But not a baldo. Never. It's the sign of demonic possession. Word.

    Ahhhh…just when I thought I had a chance with you! {puts hat back on and walks away with head down….}
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 4:40 PM GMT
    I adore chubby men who are confident and proud of them ownselves.
    I am attracted to chubby men and the thing im a lean guy !
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    Feb 26, 2014 4:48 PM GMT
    The problem is definition. When I see a picture of a man who looks like a small SUB with bad hair and he is saying he is "chubby" I often break out laughing.
    That said, I would never date an obese person mostly because I am not attracted to them and I also firmly believe that the more weight someone puts on themselves, the more issues they have yet to deal with.
    That said-I only date hairless twinks anyway.
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    Feb 26, 2014 5:15 PM GMT
    I did. And he turned out to be an asshole anyway.
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    Feb 26, 2014 5:25 PM GMT
    For me, it's not about what you look like. It's about how healthy you are. I think about the long run, which means I want a lasting relationship. And that means taking care of ourselves so that we'd be able to take care of each other. I don't think that's such an unreasonable notion, despite the way most gay men behave.

    For what it's worth, there are plenty of guys out there who obsess over their physical appearance to the extent that they harm their long-term health (e.g., steroids, tanning) in order to look desirable in the now. Smokers, alcoholics, drug users, juicers, people who self-medicate with food--none of that is healthy and none of that is for me. Comparatively speaking, some extra weight is not that big a deal.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Feb 26, 2014 5:39 PM GMT
    You know, I would hope I'd be a big enough person (so to speak) and avoid judging based on the physical characteristics of the guy I am seeing... but, I would be willing to bet that our interests and energy levels may be so different, it may become a real challenge to the relationship in general.
  • KZNindian

    Posts: 46

    Feb 26, 2014 5:40 PM GMT
    eb925guy said
    qwas saidHey guys!
    Would any of you consider a chubby guy as your life partner?

    Looking at your profile, it looks like you're wanting to remain who you are and find someone that's willing to love you as is.

    You know you could meet the person half way but working to turn yourself into someone who's not overweight or as overweight and probably increase your chances of finding that guy you want AND becoming more healthy too. There's a motivation for you to improve your health and you're on a site where you can get a lot of support to do it.

    Now is the time, this is the place, yours is the choice!


    Good advice eb925guy
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 5:46 PM GMT
    Chubby YES

    Jiggly NO!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 5:46 PM GMT
    idk...to be honest all my partners were very hot and had a fit body, but depends on the person if he is a good person and he treatsme good i might date him and buy him a gym membership ;)
  • MarvelBoy23

    Posts: 279

    Feb 26, 2014 5:49 PM GMT
    eb925guy said
    qwas saidHey guys!
    Would any of you consider a chubby guy as your life partner?

    Looking at your profile, it looks like you're wanting to remain who you are and find someone that's willing to love you as is.

    You know you could meet the person half way but working to turn yourself into someone who's not overweight or as overweight and probably increase your chances of finding that guy you want AND becoming more healthy too. There's a motivation for you to improve your health and you're on a site where you can get a lot of support to do it.

    Now is the time, this is the place, yours is the choice!


    Plus once you start doing the work, eating and living healthy, it becomes easier. You become not so lazy and you learn to strive for that extra mile on your run instead of that extra cheese on your burger!


    eb925guy is giving good advice!!! People get sedentary and lazy too quickly, the farther from their goals the more lethargic you become. Start slow and steady and ramp up as you go! Anyone can do it, you just need the right motivation for you!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 6:07 PM GMT
    I think one thing to remember as well is that it's not just about appearances, it's about lifestyle. Men who are really fit tend to live in a way that differs from those who are overweight.

    For instance, I generally wake up early in the morning to hit the gym, like to eat a lot healthy food, and want to be with someone who's going to live in a way that's compatible with that. If they're constantly wanting to hit the McD's, or even get drunk or high on a regular basis, they're not really a good match for me. There would be a lot of extra conflict and compromise. They'd end up pulling me away from a lifestyle that I enjoy.

    On the other hand, I'm not a guy who wants to have incredibly ripped abs all the time, or who wants to do a lot of calorie counting. I enjoy eating out at nice restaurants, and get excited by the words "foie gras". While my metabolism has always helped, I know I don't mind dating a guy with an extra 10/15 lbs over his muscle, or a guy who's a bit leaner and smaller than me. It's more important that our priorities are the same.

    Appearances are important to me, and I put work into mine, and I expect the same from my life partner. It doesn't seem fair that one person could just put in little effort while the other strives hard to maintain it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 6:28 PM GMT
    I would not consider someone who doesn't pass the pencil test. For this reason, I always take a pencil along on dates.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 6:58 PM GMT
    Some chubbies are cute, others can be creppy, I dated once a tall chubby guy with homicide face, he was pretty cute actually. SO yeah, they get a chance.
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    Feb 26, 2014 7:16 PM GMT
    Matt_TO83 saidI think one thing to remember as well is that it's not just about appearances, it's about lifestyle. Men who are really fit tend to live in a way that differs from those who are overweight.

    For instance, I generally wake up early in the morning to hit the gym, like to eat a lot healthy food, and want to be with someone who's going to live in a way that's compatible with that. If they're constantly wanting to hit the McD's, or even get drunk or high on a regular basis, they're not really a good match for me. There would be a lot of extra conflict and compromise. They'd end up pulling me away from a lifestyle that I enjoy.

    On the other hand, I'm not a guy who wants to have incredibly ripped abs all the time, or who wants to do a lot of calorie counting. I enjoy eating out at nice restaurants, and get excited by the words "foie gras". While my metabolism has always helped, I know I don't mind dating a guy with an extra 10/15 lbs over his muscle, or a guy who's a bit leaner and smaller than me. It's more important that our priorities are the same.

    Appearances are important to me, and I put work into mine, and I expect the same from my life partner. It doesn't seem fair that one person could just put in little effort while the other strives hard to maintain it.

    Matt makes some very good points here. Balance is everything and it's important that each party of the relationship have the save or very similar values or they'll slowly be drawn apart in their likes and dislikes. You don't have to be identical but, working out for example is something that both parties should enjoy even if one tends to be more 'in fit' than the other.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2014 7:18 PM GMT
    Nope. I wouldn't date anyone I couldn't get it up for.
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    Feb 26, 2014 7:24 PM GMT
    The thing is, and, as a fat ass, this might be hard to understand, is that most good athletes have a different mindset with the place of food, exercise, lifestyle in their lives.

    A fat ass, unless they've come through it via an incident, has never known what it is to feel healthy. E.g., to ride through the countryside on a spring day feeling their heart and lungs working and enjoying The World around them. They don't know the joy of being pumped up, or seeing themselves in the mirror looking every part the man. To them, their gratification comes from food, or laying on the couch, or, perhaps, working too much, but, whatever the case, they are in a completely different mindset than a Real Jock. A real jock does it because of how it makes him feel, look, etc. It's not a narcissist thing.

    Working out has been part of my being for 39 years. It's taken me through numerous sports injuries, depression, surgeries, relationships, etc. It defines who am I, but, not in an obsessive way. But.. I view food and exercise in a very different way (as a means) than a fat ass. They are considered building blocks in life around me. My approach towards bodybuilding: methodical, disciplined, persistent, patient, all are things that affect the way I work as a professional.

    If you don't take time to take care of yourself? Why would I want someone like that in my life?

    Yes, companionship is nice, but, there's also a physical component and that can't be ignored. If you're an unkempt fat ass, to me, that's very telling about you.

    I NEVER date closet cases. EVER. I have no need for the baggage. I can be friends with a fat ass, but, I have no interest in them sexually, and, no matter how many times they tell me how beautiful I am, it won't change that (the fact that they're fat asses). What will change that is them stepping up, getting some discipline; some self pride; doing their work.

    It's the way of The World. Being gay, nor straight, does not guarantee you acceptance.

    When I walk into a conference room of executives, in a tailored, collared, shirt, and I step up to the white board, I COMMAND the room via my physical presence. It's very primal thing.

    You have to come to accept that just because you identify as gay doesn't mean you get unconditional acceptance into the inner circles of others.

    As a jock, I have certain standards:]
    E.g.
    Self confidence (absolutely no closet cases)
    Leadership (no down low; you need a first and last name)
    Balanced lifestyle (work, fitness, relaxation)
    Intellect
    Good looks.
    Kindness / empowerment (you have to be good to other by not acting as an enabler, but, as acting as someone who empowers, instead)
    Humor (keep me giggling)

    In my book, one of the biggest studs around is a guy who can go run a marathon. That tells me so much about him. The ability to focus. Persistence. The ability to deal with discomfort. Setting a goal; attaining it. Most fat asses are completely the opposite of that, viewing themselves as victims in some shape or form.

    I'm the survivor of a triple bypass June 13, 2013. My doctors want me to compete this fall, calling me "One of Baylor's most successful patients...ever."

    Doing hard things is hard. That's what a REAL JOCK does. He steps up and does the hard things not because they are easy, but, because THEY ARE hard. They hurt. They take time. They take planning. They take quiet discipline. They are awesome to complete.

    My picture... this past Saturday at LA Fitness on Haskell in Dallas, after triple CABG June 13, 2013,. Did it hurt? Oh, fuck, yeah. Really, really, really bad. Was it worth it? Yep. That's what makes me different from a fat ass. I was literally sawed in half, and then, I went right back to working out just two days later. I hope this helps you to understand a Real Jock from an also ran. Real Jocks have discipline. Real Jocks have focus. Real Jocks execute a plan. Real Jocks often lead (I'm an open gay activist and one of my stories was 11'th of the year in The Huffington Post for 2013.). Get up and do it.

    What's your excuse for staying a fat ass?

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    Looks fade; we have sports injuries; we grow old, but, we need to grow old with folks we can share The World with in a similar way.

    Would I date an out marathon runner, or ex-gi? In a heartbeat.

    Would I date a fat, hairy, guy whose most exercise was the Walmart lot in the past 10 years? No way. Might go eat with him, but, we have no middle ground. We simply view The World in a different way.

    We're Real Jocks.

    I find the lack of attention to the self, well being, appearance...a huge turnoff...at SO many levels. Lack of discipline; fucked up priorities; etc., etc.