I met a really interesing guy, but we have different personalities

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    Dec 22, 2008 1:19 AM GMT
    So long story short, he was attracted to me, I did not know him much, but his friend arranged our "meeting", a few nights ago.

    It was a really great night, we talked for hours, about various things, I had to leave become I worked early in the morning. We won't see each other during the Holidays because we both are returning to our respective family, but at the end of the night he said "let's do more stuff when we will be back in jan".

    Now the problem is, we have totally different personalities.
    I am an introvert, almost a nerd, I enjoy reading, playing some computer games sometimes, going to movies, studying, and the only sports that I do right now is gym.

    he is more like an artist, he is a good cook, he likes to dance, he likes music a lot (i don't know that much about music)... It's not to say that I a not willing to try different things though..


    but I wonder if we are so different I should even think we might be "compatible"?
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    Dec 22, 2008 1:27 AM GMT
    Hell yes, go for it, if you got along see where it goes.. the differences are what makes a relationship so worth while, who wants a mirror image of them self??

    You might even find that the differences in each other causing you to be introduced to new and exciting things that you'd never considered before, you might end up finding new ideas and thoughts that intrigue and excite you.

    You might butt heads a few times on core things, but thats kewl, as long as you can both realise that you are both different people and butting heads can make for some excitement in a relationship..

    Mate, you are different to him, you will know different things to what he knows, you'll both bring different things to the table, so dive the hell in and learn as much as you possible can about him, who he is and what gets him going and have fun, enjoy it and let it go where ever it wants to go!!!
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    Dec 22, 2008 1:34 AM GMT
    What tanker said. No harm in giving it a go. icon_razz.gif There are couples that are like peas in a pod, and then there are those that complement each other's weaknesses and strengths.

    Just be honest when the time comes for you to decide if you both want to go further.
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    Dec 22, 2008 2:05 AM GMT
    Topamax saidSo long story short, he was attracted to me, I did not know him much, but his friend arranged our "meeting", a few nights ago.

    It was a really great night, we talked for hours, about various things, I had to leave become I worked early in the morning. We won't see each other during the Holidays because we both are returning to our respective family, but at the end of the night he said "let's do more stuff when we will be back in jan".

    Now the problem is, we have totally different personalities.
    I am an introvert, almost a nerd, I enjoy reading, playing some computer games sometimes, going to movies, studying, and the only sports that I do right now is gym.

    he is more like an artist, he is a good cook, he likes to dance, he likes music a lot (i don't know that much about music)... It's not to say that I a not willing to try different things though..


    but I wonder if we are so different I should even think we might be "compatible"?


    I think different personalities work great, IF you are willing to compromise and learn/try new things. Go for it...what's the worst that can happen? By the way, why is your screename the same as the name of a Prescription Pain Medication? Just wondering...
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    Dec 22, 2008 2:59 AM GMT
    You know what? As you get to know each other, I think you'll find that you're not so different after all.
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    Dec 22, 2008 4:03 AM GMT
    ever heard the saying : opposites attract? go for it!
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    Dec 22, 2008 4:11 AM GMT
    thanks for the replies..

    I am just afraid that I have less to offer to him then he does to me... heh.

    (And to answer your previous question I chose Topamax simply because my dad use this medication).
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    Dec 22, 2008 4:31 AM GMT
    Topamax saidthanks for the replies..

    I am just afraid that I have less to offer to him then he does to me... heh.



    If he's so different from you, he might be happy to have someone who will listen to him.
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    Dec 22, 2008 4:38 AM GMT
    lilTanker saidHell yes, go for it, if you got along see where it goes.. the differences are what makes a relationship so worth while, who wants a mirror image of them self??

    You might even find that the differences in each other causing you to be introduced to new and exciting things that you'd never considered before, you might end up finding new ideas and thoughts that intrigue and excite you.

    You might butt heads a few times on core things, but thats kewl, as long as you can both realise that you are both different people and butting heads can make for some excitement in a relationship..

    Mate, you are different to him, you will know different things to what he knows, you'll both bring different things to the table, so dive the hell in and learn as much as you possible can about him, who he is and what gets him going and have fun, enjoy it and let it go where ever it wants to go!!!


    EXACTLY!!!! Good jon lilTanker!!!!
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    Dec 22, 2008 5:51 AM GMT
    GO FOR IT!!!!!!!!!!!

    Did you ever see a couple (gay or straight) who acted so much like each other that it made you want to barf? They walk, talk and dress the same.... they have the same temperment and drive.

    To each his own. But I would prefer to be in a relationship where we compliment each other....fill in the blanks......new ideas and interests to challeng my comfort zone.


    GO FOR IT!!!!!
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    Dec 22, 2008 5:57 AM GMT
    Topamax saidthanks for the replies..

    I am just afraid that I have less to offer to him then he does to me... heh.

    (And to answer your previous question I chose Topamax simply because my dad use this medication).


    Why do you have less to offer, how is what you have worth less then what he has, what you have to offer is simple different from him, thus, what you offer is of equal but of differing value..

    its like carrots and corn right, they are both different, but damn it if they aint just both two of the most delicious vegetables around!!!
  • Hunter9

    Posts: 1039

    Dec 22, 2008 6:22 AM GMT
    you said you "Talked for hours", which tells me that either you have more in common with each other than you realize, or the fact that you guys are fairly different will end up being irrelevant.
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    Dec 22, 2008 10:30 AM GMT
    apperently both of you felt tthe evening was worth it else you would nothave talked for hours
    don,t put yourself down, by thinking you might haveless value compared to him
    you might just be who he is looking for
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    Dec 22, 2008 10:34 AM GMT
    Yay for my 100th post. i think you should go for it. it's not gonna kill you and it's just good practice! I mean, i think you should do it so you get out of your comfort zone (:
  • thisguy023

    Posts: 204

    Dec 22, 2008 11:04 AM GMT

    My man is the total opposite from me. It has worked for the last 17 years. Some of his character rubbed off on me, and some of mine on him.
    (I became a little more outgoing and he actually started reading books)

    Interestingly, deep down we share the same core values. The rest is just packaging.
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    Dec 22, 2008 12:59 PM GMT
    Spot on thisguy. I fell madly for a guy who had a totally different background, upbringing, personality, character etc etc, but ultimately none of that made any difference, in the end it failed because our values were different.
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    Dec 22, 2008 1:12 PM GMT
    I'm jealous and think you're retarded at the same time... You are sabotaging yourself before you even give it a chance. If he has tracks up and down his arms, rotting teeth, or he stinks... Those are the kind of alarms that should make you say hmmm let me toss this one back.
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    Jan 01, 2009 7:29 PM GMT
    I say pursue it and see where things go. I can see the two of u complmenting each other (based on the post, the two of u seem to have qualiteis that area lacking in the other). It'll be fun to be around someone so different. It might expose you to new experiences that u never though you'd enjoy.

    Btw...are you attracted to him???
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    Jan 01, 2009 7:39 PM GMT
    Generally speaking, it's best to go with your instinct. Once your past all the lust, and relief of being unlonely, fresh meat, etc., you need to ask yourself if your personalities mesh. You've already said they don't. Next question is whether, or not, your personalities work together being different. If they don't, you need to move on to someone whom you share more common interests with. Physical attraction is not what drives things long term. The mesh of your personalities should be automatic. It should just be "magic." If it isn't, likely it won't work well in the long term.

    Lots of young men get caught up in the lust, and in the moment, and fail to think clearly and to make sound judgments. If the relationship is work in making the personalities mesh, it's wrong. The relationship should be "magic" and should be enjoyable from the get-go.

    If you share dissimilar interests, different value sets, the long term chances are low, at best.

    This is just a common sense thing, when you pause to think about it clearly.

    Take some time to think your question through. You'll find the answer within.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Jan 01, 2009 10:39 PM GMT
    I think it's great that you found someone who's a little different from you
    I always liked the differences there were in the guys that I dated

    It's what makes finding out things and experiences better
    How boring would it be if we were all like our partners and they like us? icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Jan 02, 2009 1:57 AM GMT
    nysexy saidI say pursue it and see where things go. I can see the two of u complmenting each other (based on the post, the two of u seem to have qualiteis that area lacking in the other). It'll be fun to be around someone so different. It might expose you to new experiences that u never though you'd enjoy.

    Btw...are you attracted to him???


    Yes I am, he is really nice, he got a killer smile, etc.

    We have not talked much over the holidays over msn we were not online much and we we did talk that was only for a few minutes (had to go do other stuff etc.). Dunno if that tells anything.

    I guess I will give it a try in january, kinda stressed out about what to do first (he was the one inviting me to that dinner about 2 weeks ago) and how it will work out heh.
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    Jan 04, 2009 2:55 PM GMT
    Opposites attract don't they? Well at least, that is if you are a magnet. I think having different interest is good because it means you won't get sick of each other