Funny ppl at the gym

  • comoesta

    Posts: 21

    Mar 04, 2014 12:46 AM GMT
    Today at the gym a guy was waiting to use the machine after me. In the mean time he started to squat down in the middle space nd his hand nd body was swinging in all directions. He was weaing shorts nd his hanging junk was outlined under fabric. I went to told him that i was done nd he started talking to me in that weird pose.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 04, 2014 4:29 AM GMT
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 05, 2014 1:28 AM GMT
    My boyfriend and I have codenamed a lot of the people at the gym due to their outlandish appearance and/or behavior. For example, there's "oil slick," who always has incredibly gelled hair, "the skeleton," a woman who should be dead by now from trying to live on sunlight, and "leatherface," an old gay dude who is creepy as shit and has really gross skin from years of steroid abuse. My gym could easily be a primetime comedy show.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 05, 2014 2:42 AM GMT
    Funny people at the gym: Me trying to look confident while carrying my 3 sheets of workout routine and being lost around the machines 90% of the time.
  • madsexy

    Posts: 4843

    Mar 05, 2014 2:57 AM GMT
    YPP1 saidFunny people at the gym: Me trying to look confident while carrying my 3 sheets of workout routine and being lost around the machines 90% of the time.

    You'll soon realize that MANY people are as out of their element at the gym as you feel right now. The difference is that you'll probably stick with it, and very soon you'll not only have confidence and look confident but you'll help the guys who haven't got there yet. Keep it up!
  • onefortified

    Posts: 1630

    Mar 05, 2014 2:57 AM GMT
    People at the gym be like...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 05, 2014 3:22 AM GMT
    I've got the one guy that wears a shirt and shorts but decides that rolling them up so that they barely cover any of his skin is a good look. Then there's Papa Smurf-older guy that always wears the same blue tank top and blue shorts every day. Porky Pig-see him in the locker room all the time with a shirt but no bottoms. Nips-has a nice body but his high beams are almost ridiculously on all the time....the list goes on and on.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 05, 2014 4:16 AM GMT
    I hate people who decide to casually sit or hang around a machine/equipment and just natter for hours on end with another idiot, particularly when there's no other machine/equipment free during busy hours. Not funny, but thought I'd vent here in case anyone can relate.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 05, 2014 4:30 AM GMT
    We have a middle-aged asian guy we call "dance fever".

    Just him. Dancin' away.


    About 8ft by 8ft of space staked out in the middle of the gym.

    For hours. At least he doesn't use the machines.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 05, 2014 4:42 AM GMT
    When I go to the gym... well I put my earpods, music high... and sing sing sing... at least not celine dion songs lol... but looks like I'm on american idol :/ icon_biggrin.gif
  • CincyBOJ

    Posts: 306

    Mar 05, 2014 5:47 AM GMT
    Shake Weight man: this guy who does fast,short range reps; total range of motion is about a half inch.

    Passive aggressive man: performs exercises with way too much weight, throws and thrashes his body to sling the weight into motion. He does not have the body of someone who CAN move this amount of weight.

    Motivational music guy: young guy, always wears a knit hat and earphones, gets totally psyched and screams out lyrics..... in his own world... thrashes weight plates like he's gonna kill something.... can't see any gains on him yet. I wish him well.

    Hottie back brace guy: wears a back belt for everything.... nothing funny here, but totally noteworthy.



    This morning I saw a guy I hadn't seen before... huge bicep, no other muscles.



  • kew1

    Posts: 1595

    Mar 05, 2014 12:58 PM GMT
    One man was told to do crunches with bent legs, sliding his hands up to his knees. He did them for weeks, ignoring people who kept on telling him to actually use his stomach muscles & not JUST slide his hands up & down his thighs.He finally took notice of one of the trainers.
  • SomeSiciliano...

    Posts: 543

    Mar 05, 2014 4:15 PM GMT

    We have 'P-Whipped Boy': he is 18-19-ish who actually can lift and do cardio while texting with his girlfriend.

    'Passive-Aggressive Man' also works out at my gym. Arms and legs all over the damn place and his body language screams rage.

    The best was 'It is better to look good than feel good' man. Last week he pulled his hoodie pull over off and his cigs and lighter flew across the stretching area icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 05, 2014 8:57 PM GMT
    I'm at a suburban Long Island New York Sports Club which attracts lots of interesting types but none stuck out like "The Queen of Sheba."

    No, this was not a fabulous black drag queen but a rich old woman with Kiwi black hair who bore a startling resemblence to Sylvester Stallone's mom:

    116v1v5.jpg

    and was built and wore workout outfits like this:

    ei9qna.jpg

    ...but in all white so tight she had camel toe with her white stretch Bermuda shorts revealing every dimple of cellulite on her ample ass.

    I'd see her out and about in town driving her Jaguar dressed in white furs. She'd only train in the company of her young male trainer.

    Because I have a soft spot for oddballs and non-conformists I became the only gym member who'd say hi to her, and according to her trainer I became the only member she'd say hi to and ask about! Until one day I left one of three cable crossover machines (placing my drink and towel on each pulley handle) to superset for ten seconds on an adjacent bench and within six she and the trainer moved my drink and towel to take over. I told them I was using it and she coldly told me not to ever block her from a machine again. Given her age I thought "Who do you think you are, The Queen of Sheba?" but said "Sure, everyone should make way for you" or some such and walked off to keep my distance. But every time she passed within earshot she badmouthed me. I soon learned that she's an absolute horror to the help everywhere, every restaurant in town keeps tabs on her, she constantly complains about being sexually harassed and she's famously litigious. In fact, she quit because despite her being a "whale" with respect to trainer usage the gym backed me and she sued them for the balance of her unused trainer sessions. On what grounds? That "supersetting" was never mentioned in the contract so the gym was in breach of it. The gym tells me not to sweat it because they have a fleet of attorneys on retainer who love to deal with people like this.

    I can sure pick 'em!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 05, 2014 9:47 PM GMT
    At my gym there is a guy who does a strange sort of robot dance to warm up.

    There is another guy who puts his fists up and goes "yeah" at the end of the spin class, like he had won a race. It was a bit annoying after a while because I wanted it to be my turn to win the race. I have spoken to him many times since and I like him now.

    Finally there is a guy who tries to lift heavy weights, then gives up and lifts weights that a child could lift instead. After that he tries to give advice to the personal trainers and the biggest guys in the gym. I do not like him at all.
  • madsexy

    Posts: 4843

    Mar 06, 2014 3:03 PM GMT
    We have one HOT guy at my gym who, during the weeknights, works out alone. He lifts heavy and strong, and he does about an hour of cardo. On the weekends his girlfriend or wife is with him, and she is always walking over to him, often in the middle of his set, talking to him. He stops to talk to her then adjusts the weight and starts over. Same with cardio - she ALWAYS interrupts him and he leaves the cardio area for her. As I said, he's hot, so he's worth watching - and I've never seen him do a complete set with her there, and he always has this "yes, dear" look on his face when she interrupts him and a bit of a frown after when he's starting up again. Guess he's a brother or cousin of SomeSiciliano's p-whipped guy in Chicago. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Latenight30

    Posts: 1525

    Mar 06, 2014 4:06 PM GMT
    These are my favorite threads on this site.
    If someone is doing something odd or even potentially harmful, there used to be enough community in the gym to allow someone to point it out. Now, everyone thinks if you speak you are trying to pick someone up.
    They need to know, that's only some of the time. J/K
    I do wish folks would break down their walls in the gym. It's not so scary, and fat or thin, inshape or not, you are doing more than the person walking by on the way to the coffee shop!
  • BillandChuck

    Posts: 2024

    Mar 06, 2014 4:15 PM GMT
    Latenight30 saidThese are my favorite threads on this site.
    If someone is doing something odd or even potentially harmful, there used to be enough community in the gym to allow someone to point it out. Now, everyone thinks if you speak you are trying to pick someone up.
    They need to know, that's only some of the time. J/K
    I do wish folks would break down their walls in the gym. It's not so scary, and fat or thin, inshape or not, you are doing more than the person walking by on the way to the coffee shop!

    Excellent point. There's such a difference between going to the gym on base and going to the membership gym in town. On base there's tons of interaction, mostly non-sexual and non-pickup oriented. At the gym in town, very little, and what little there is usually tends toward the sexual or pickup, except right around the front desk.

    We have a woman at our gym who, when she is listening to her music on the elliptical or treadmill, often sings along, clearly spiritual-type music, sometimes even with arms waving, obviously praising whatever. A few months ago someone complained about her at the front desk, and we were leaving at the time. The person complaining was (haven't seen him since, actually) a total pig, leaving used paper towels around, hogging machines, standing on the track talking and in runners' and walkers' way, and some even more foul infractions we won't mention. We (Bill, the agressive one, no surprise there!) butted into the conversation and dressed him down about all his inappropriate behavior in the gym and pointed out that a "joyful noise" was far preferable to his CRAP. As we mentioned the complainer hasn't been seen by us since, so maybe he went somewhere else (there aren't a plethora of choices in this area of the island) or changed times or something. The next time we saw the woman, we talked to her and told her we enjoyed her enthusiasm and to just keep on doing what she's doing.