Can somebody explain me?

  • dennissis

    Posts: 18

    Mar 09, 2014 8:04 AM GMT
    Hi guys,

    I need some advice to improve my knowledge on STDs. I am going to be direct to you in this post, hopefully you won't judge me for being paranoid, or revealing irrelevant stuff.

    Here is the thing: Today, I had my first sex with some random guy that I met on Grindr. I know it is not the best way of having sex, but I am 27 and I was still a virgin. I wanted to change this. Overall, everything went well, . Of course, I was cautious for not getting an STD, so I used condoms during the intercourse.

    But now, I came home and I started being paranoid about what happened with this guy that I picked randomly. To be more specific, during the intercourse, we had some oral play without condoms at the beginning, and he shitted on me (which sounds disgusting now) when I started getting into him (I was wearing a condom during this). I am only writing these to let you know the level of intercourse, so that you can understand the situation.

    Now here are my questions:

    (1) How safe was this intercourse? I know this guy is just random, and this is a risk factor on its own, but using condoms and all that, did I still do something wrong?

    (2) Should I be worried about getting an STD now? Do I need to get tested immediately? Would it be too paranoid to do such a thing?

    (3) If there is no point in being paranoid now, what are the symptoms that should alert me?

    When I read the articles online, I get the impression that there is no such thing called safe sex. They are too cautious that, they only feed my paranoia. But when I think about amount of sex going on in the world, what I did cannot be that wrong, can it?

    I guess since this was my first time, I am freaking out and feeling like I did something wrong. Doing this with a random guy wasn't the best choice, and I know that, but I was pretty stuck with this virginity thing that I wanted to pass this barrier, and had nobody that I know who I can approach for this.

    I am open to all the advice that you can give, but please don't judge.

    Thank you all for reading and comments...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2014 10:47 AM GMT
    Happy for you that you are no more virgin. As you said you had used condom that means you had safe sex. But I am afraid the oral was not. again, that too is minimal. Because that would require unhealthy mouth (bleeding or cuts) and minor cut or openings on penis .

    I would see if someone advises for an instant test here. I would advise for a general window period test and not to imagine too much. Because that would be way worst.

    Good luck!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2014 2:09 PM GMT
    dennissis saidHi guys,

    I need some advice to improve my knowledge on STDs. I am going to be direct to you in this post, hopefully you won't judge me for being paranoid, or revealing irrelevant stuff.

    Here is the thing: Today, I had my first sex with some random guy that I met on Grindr. I know it is not the best way of having sex, but I am 27 and I was still a virgin. I wanted to change this. Overall, everything went well, . Of course, I was cautious for not getting an STD, so I used condoms during the intercourse.

    But now, I came home and I started being paranoid about what happened with this guy that I picked randomly. To be more specific, during the intercourse, we had some oral play without condoms at the beginning, and he shitted on me (which sounds disgusting now) when I started getting into him (I was wearing a condom during this). I am only writing these to let you know the level of intercourse, so that you can understand the situation.

    Now here are my questions:

    (1) How safe was this intercourse? I know this guy is just random, and this is a risk factor on its own, but using condoms and all that, did I still do something wrong?

    (2) Should I be worried about getting an STD now? Do I need to get tested immediately? Would it be too paranoid to do such a thing?

    (3) If there is no point in being paranoid now, what are the symptoms that should alert me?

    When I read the articles online, I get the impression that there is no such thing called safe sex. They are too cautious that, they only feed my paranoia. But when I think about amount of sex going on in the world, what I did cannot be that wrong, can it?

    I guess since this was my first time, I am freaking out and feeling like I did something wrong. Doing this with a random guy wasn't the best choice, and I know that, but I was pretty stuck with this virginity thing that I wanted to pass this barrier, and had nobody that I know who I can approach for this.

    I am open to all the advice that you can give, but please don't judge.

    Thank you all for reading and comments...


    Why did you allow someone to shit on your? That's gross!
  • dennissis

    Posts: 18

    Mar 09, 2014 2:58 PM GMT
    I didn't allow it. It just happened.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2014 8:22 PM GMT
    dennissis saidHi guys,

    I need some advice to improve my knowledge on STDs. I am going to be direct to you in this post, hopefully you won't judge me for being paranoid, or revealing irrelevant stuff.

    Here is the thing: Today, I had my first sex with some random guy that I met on Grindr. I know it is not the best way of having sex, but I am 27 and I was still a virgin. I wanted to change this. Overall, everything went well, . Of course, I was cautious for not getting an STD, so I used condoms during the intercourse.

    But now, I came home and I started being paranoid about what happened with this guy that I picked randomly. To be more specific, during the intercourse, we had some oral play without condoms at the beginning, and he shitted on me (which sounds disgusting now) when I started getting into him (I was wearing a condom during this). I am only writing these to let you know the level of intercourse, so that you can understand the situation.

    Now here are my questions:

    (1) How safe was this intercourse? I know this guy is just random, and this is a risk factor on its own, but using condoms and all that, did I still do something wrong?

    (2) Should I be worried about getting an STD now? Do I need to get tested immediately? Would it be too paranoid to do such a thing?

    (3) If there is no point in being paranoid now, what are the symptoms that should alert me?

    When I read the articles online, I get the impression that there is no such thing called safe sex. They are too cautious that, they only feed my paranoia. But when I think about amount of sex going on in the world, what I did cannot be that wrong, can it?

    I guess since this was my first time, I am freaking out and feeling like I did something wrong. Doing this with a random guy wasn't the best choice, and I know that, but I was pretty stuck with this virginity thing that I wanted to pass this barrier, and had nobody that I know who I can approach for this.

    I am open to all the advice that you can give, but please don't judge.

    Thank you all for reading and comments...


    Centers for Disease Control has a lot of this.

    You'll want to do your own research. Don't rely on bro science.

    I am gonna judge, because judgement keeps us from stupid things. You're 27 and you've never dug down on these issues? Come on? Are you a troll?

    Sex is raw. Period.

    Read up on sites like the SDC. You have a responsibility to yourself and to the global community.

    As far as your recent encounter... I wouldn't sweat it too much. Sounds weird (unless you're into scat), but, reasonably protected behavior.

    I think you have deeper issues, though, and may want to seek the help of a mental health professional to understand more about yourself.

    Technology varies for detection for various STD's. Many, many, many folks walk around with HIV, and have no clue they have it. Same with others STDS. Study STD's. Bring yourself up to speed. Don't be so lazy.

    http://www.realjock.com/splash/51
  • Breeman

    Posts: 339

    Mar 10, 2014 3:10 AM GMT
    Put your mind at ease and go get tested.

    I had a similar experience many years ago. I remember that feeling waiting in the clinic for the doctor to call my name.

    I'm a lot more cautious now and you should be too.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 10, 2014 3:37 AM GMT
    Damn boy when I think of bad moments during sex I could think of maybe a dirty ass,you fart accidentally,you burp,or you cant get it up.Getting shit on.You should have knocked him the fuck out.Ryan
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 10, 2014 6:01 AM GMT
    dennissis
    First off congratulations on taking the step you felt you needed with losing your virginity.

    No judgement on my end!

    To hopefully help answer your questions:

    1:
    I agree with your statement that there is no such thing as "safe sex." Sex among normal means of intercourse is not 100% safe. However there is "safer sex" which can significantly minimize your risk by using barriers such as condoms, dental dams, etc. I say this not to scare you but just to further educate. If the condom didn't break during sex then you more than likely are good on that end.

    Unprotected oral sex still carries risk of transmission and is higher if there are any cuts or bleeding happening inside the mouth and there are small cuts or bleeding happening on the penis area. It also carries risk if he came in your mouth. It is seen as unconventional in gay culture, but using flavored condoms is a more enjoyable way to enjoy safer oral sex.

    Contact with his fecal matter could give exposure to Hepatitus A though if it reached your mouth (If you haven't gotten the vaccine I would highly suggest you get one, especially as a man who has sex with men). I am guessing more than likely it didn't reach your mouth though and you had a condom on when going into him so I would think your risk is very low.

    2:
    I don't think you should get tested this early, the minimum I would suggest is to wait 2 weeks from when you had sex to get a "rapid" test (I personally would go with wait a month). The rapid test usually can have your result, but a follow up at the three month mark will yield a much higher accuracy.

    3: The symptoms that should alert you are if you develop a flu-like illness within the next month or two (can go up to 3 months).

    If you are overly paranoid about catching Sexually Transmitted Infections (STI) like HIV then I would suggest to possibly stay away from hooking up with people you don't know well like the men off of grindr or other gay apps. Condoms and other barriers only help prevent against other STIs from the area that is covered in latex. Other STIs are transmitted from skin to skin contact like herpes, genital warts, and HPV.

    With all of what I said you are young and figuring stuff out for the first time. Despite what I have said don't be afraid to explore yourself sexually and general anxiety around your first hookup is normal, you don't need to feel. My advice is that you don't necessarily have to limit yourself, just make smart choices about who you want to engage with sexually.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 11, 2014 5:05 AM GMT
    you might want to ensure he douches next timeā€¦ and even at that, shit happens.. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 11, 2014 11:09 PM GMT
    Gross.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 11, 2014 11:47 PM GMT
    icon_eek.gif
  • Latenight30

    Posts: 1525

    Mar 14, 2014 5:59 PM GMT
    Yeah I don't think this was SCAT behavior yall. That would be one way to lose your virginity.
    The poop factor isn't great, but wearing a condom, is always the right choice.
    The oral, don't worry to much about it. That will cause you the flu like symptoms mentioned; the stress of worry.
    When it comes to being new, be cautious. Make sure you have a set of boundaries you will not cross, no matter how hot, or how "into" each other you are.
    But, we aren't making babies here, so also go and have fun.