Upgraded poser scenerio

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 28, 2008 5:22 PM GMT
    We all have heard/experienced the stories of guys meeting up for sex/friendship from guys that showed you hot pictures of "themselves" in their profile.....only to show up on your doorstep looking the complete opposite. They lied to you!!!! You should be furious with them right? Well what if they showed up and they look much more attractive. What would you do? Would you slam the door in there face because a lie is still a lie or would you continue with your meeting/hook up and find out more about them?
  • Sparkycat

    Posts: 1064

    Dec 28, 2008 5:55 PM GMT
    If they look more attractive than their pictures? Count my blessings, drag 'em in the house, and go for it. Some people just don't photograph well.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 28, 2008 6:13 PM GMT
    I met PSCalif and found him MUCH more attractive than his pictures!!! I've been trying to hold onto him since. LOL!

    A lie is a lie, but if you are going off of pictures to make your choice you are really just lying to yourself. If they used pictures 20 years old or described themselves deceitfully, I would be concerned. For instance, if he is better looking but describes himself in a less than light and uses pics decades old because he thinks that was his prime, he probably has self-esteem issues - not a good choice for dating.
  • MSUBioNerd

    Posts: 1813

    Dec 28, 2008 6:58 PM GMT
    I've met a few guys who were decidedly more attractive than their posted pictures, but still looked enough like the posted picture for you to be sure it was the same person. I don't find that problematic at all--some people are just not photogenic. I similarly don't have a problem with individuals who aren't as attractive as their pictures but where it looks like it's probably just an effect of lighting and a good facial expression, as there's nothing really deceptive in that. I think there's only a problem when the picture's multiple years and/or 20+ pounds off from current reality.
  • leatherman05

    Posts: 44

    Dec 28, 2008 6:59 PM GMT
    cut the moral and ethical crap - either there is doorstep chemistry or there is not. if not, the fact that he misled u is a useful excuse to do what your penus dictates anyway.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 28, 2008 7:06 PM GMT
    I don't think I've ever been pleasantly surprised by someone looking better in person than in his profile!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 28, 2008 8:31 PM GMT
    I don't get what's being discussed here. If the guy posted a completely fake picture of himself and he turns out to be hot, I would still be suspicious. He might be a serial killer. icon_lol.gif

    If the guy posted a real picture of himself but looks different in person, then I don't think it's a big deal. As others have said, some guys are more photogenic than others.
  • cowboyathlete

    Posts: 1346

    Dec 28, 2008 8:35 PM GMT
    There is a difference between being photogenic and outright lying. I planned to hook up with a guy one Saturday night some years ago. His faceless pic (red flag) showed a very well built man with a raging boner. However, what showed up at my door was a fat man who had apparently never been near a gym a day in his life. Needless to say I sent him away.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 28, 2008 10:07 PM GMT

    Why would you turn down an upgrade?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 28, 2008 10:13 PM GMT
    Could be a Microsoft upgrade. You could be fucking him, moaning, and then BSOD. Doh.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 28, 2008 10:34 PM GMT
    Let me give you another variant on this, where the RECIPIENT of the pic made the mistake. I'm prolly the only guy in history to have ever made this stupid error, but here's the story:

    I'd been exchanging pics with different guys online, and one handsome guy really interested me. I put all these downloaded pics in a folder, but being terminally ditzy, I soon confused screen names & faces.

    So this one guy was really pursuing me, and we talked on the phone, and he invited me to fly down to stay with him for a couple of weeks. By now I thought this was the handsome guy, and I agreed.

    I arrived at the airport, looking for the pic guy. Instead I'm greeted by another guy, whom I recognized from his own accurate pic. You wanna talk about confused & disoriented!

    But I recovered and was gracious, and in truth he wasn't a bad-looking guy, just not the one I expected. Still, he was the guy on the phone and online, who had charmed me with his words (is this a Cyrano scene?), and during the next 2 weeks I was totally swept off my feet. About 5 months later we became partners, that lasted until his untimely death.

    I don't want to defend guys who fake their photos; deception is not a way to start a relationship, and not the kind of character I want to be around. At the same time, pics aren't everything.

    I accidently stumbled across the most lovely guy, who didn't have a lovely pic, just a lovely heart. If I have to choose, I'll take heart over headshot.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2008 12:20 AM GMT
    Vespa - incredible story. It proves again the old chestnut that you can;t just go by looks alone when looking for love.

    As for the OP's question I would find it very strange if a guy posted fake pics of some one less attractive than himself. Doesn't that defeat the point?

    If in all unliklihood it did happen, ethically I'd like to say that I'd chase him off for being a liar, but we all know how penis power can cloud the judgment.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2008 12:28 AM GMT
    Not sure I get what you mean. Sometimes people look markedly different in person than in their pictures. It's not their fault, and they're not lying to you.

    In fact, look at a dozen photos of the same person taken in the same year and it's highly likely they'll look somewhat "different" in many of them. Haircuts, lighting, facial expressions can change the way a person looks.

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    Dec 29, 2008 12:44 AM GMT
    Tonyvoyager saidVespa - incredible story. It proves again the old chestnut that you can't just go by looks alone when looking for love.

    Ah, there is wisdom indeed. And when we have these RJ questions about what physical part of a guy attracts us most, my answer would be the eyes.

    Because I think (perhaps vainly) that I can look into a man's eyes and see his soul, his heart. And that above all else must be good, or it's no deal for me.

    If you can find both a great soul in a great body, then gawd bless you, I envy you. But don't go for the body without the soul. And don't overlook the great soul in a not-so-great body. The body will decline, but the soul endures.
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    Dec 29, 2008 1:39 AM GMT
    I find that those people who are really charismatic, energetic, and lively to not take the best pictures. Those attributes come out not in a single frame but in an encounter, which makes them more attractive. So yeah, I'd believe that some people photograph as less attractive, because what is most attractive is how they interact with you.
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    Dec 29, 2008 1:43 AM GMT
    ursamajor saidCould be a Microsoft upgrade. You could be fucking him, moaning, and then BSOD. Doh.


    LOL. Terry's a geek! Terry's a geek!

    * puts fresh piece of tape on glasses *
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2008 2:57 AM GMT
    Well, I can tell you that when hooking up sexually, physical attraction certainly outweighs personal integrity. So if they look substantially better than their pics, enough that they might be confused for another person, then I take that only as a positive.

    Also, it might be charming if they chose pictures where they look less attractive -- it could be a cute lack of awareness of their own hotness.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2008 3:49 AM GMT
    lissenup saidI don't think I've ever been pleasantly surprised by someone looking better in person than in his profile!


    Oh it happens to me icon_wink.gif

    One I especially remember was one Argentinian guy who looked ok in his pics, but in person... damn. Way out of my league (or so I thought, he amazingly didn´t agree icon_razz.gif): amazing looks, amazing body. You can imagine the rest of the story... ufff.. Ai papito.... (dame lo que quiero jjejeje)

    Actually the same thing happened with a cute Colombian too... icon_twisted.gif The weird thing was they still wanted to meet up with me after seeing me haha.. Anyway, *if* I am going to do a hookup (which happens less and less now) I do cam first now, after a shocker with another argentinian (which I prefer to forget).

    (and there was another time with a chilean... nice pics, but in reality the guy was absolutely stunning... Actually the "better than advertised" thing happens quite a lot to me. Not sure why. Maybe it´s a Latin thing)

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    Dec 29, 2008 3:53 AM GMT
    gymguy1 saidWe all have heard/experienced the stories of guys meeting up for sex/friendship from guys that showed you hot pictures of "themselves" in their profile.....only to show up on your doorstep looking the complete opposite. They lied to you!!!! You should be furious with them right? Well what if they showed up and they look much more attractive. What would you do? Would you slam the door in there face because a lie is still a lie or would you continue with your meeting/hook up and find out more about them?


    Well technically they didn't lie to you if the "hot pictures" were indeed of "themselves".....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2008 6:54 AM GMT


    hey gymguy1

    The first scene you describe is someone putting altered or even fake pics online.

    The second scene you describe is someone putting their own pics online, someone who may not be photogenic or great with a camera.

    Now here's where it gets a little muddled. Are you saying the second scenario is where a good looking guy deliberately puts up fake or photo-shopped pics to make him appear ugly?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2008 7:45 AM GMT
    I am saying that the guy is using a fake profile picture....just so happens that he was hotter than the picture he posted.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2008 8:06 AM GMT
    Lostboy76 said
    lissenup saidI don't think I've ever been pleasantly surprised by someone looking better in person than in his profile!


    Oh it happens to me icon_wink.gif

    One I especially remember was one Argentinian guy who looked ok in his pics, but in person... damn. Way out of my league (or so I thought, he amazingly didn´t agree icon_razz.gif): amazing looks, amazing body. You can imagine the rest of the story... ufff.. Ai papito.... (dame lo que quiero jjejeje)

    Actually the same thing happened with a cute Colombian too... icon_twisted.gif The weird thing was they still wanted to meet up with me after seeing me haha.. Anyway, *if* I am going to do a hookup (which happens less and less now) I do cam first now, after a shocker with another argentinian (which I prefer to forget).

    (and there was another time with a chilean... nice pics, but in reality the guy was absolutely stunning... Actually the "better than advertised" thing happens quite a lot to me. Not sure why. Maybe it´s a Latin thing)



    yea man, it's 'cause we got the heat! I've been told I look much better in person that online. I guess it's a good thing. better than the other way around.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2008 10:02 AM GMT
    Despite my photos, I actually look much better in real life. Pity no one believes me icon_cry.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2008 12:48 PM GMT
    If he's hotter than his picts, well not everyone takes good pictures. That's like a bonus perk/free upgrade at the rental car desk or airline ticket counter. WOOHOOOOO!!! If he's not the guy in the picts, either picts too old or a different man all together. Well that's grounds for a walk out...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2008 4:42 PM GMT

    gymguy1 said, "I am saying that the guy is using a fake profile picture....just so happens that he was hotter than the picture he posted."

    Thanks gymgu1y, neither of us were sure. So, a guy deliberately puts fake pictures on his profile that make him look ugly. So, you get a nice surprise at your door. Well, we're both imagining this particular scenario to be quite rare. We'll venture this: that the person is using fakes to hide his real image online as he's in the closet online out of concern for job, family, etc.

    So the reasons for the lie are what determines whether you slam the door or not, not just because he lied.