I need advice on dating and finding a gay friend

  • mark515

    Posts: 1

    Apr 09, 2014 4:30 AM GMT
    Hi everyone,
    I have spent many years trying to get someone that I like to like me. Everytime we initiate a conversation it turned out that the other party did not reply me back after one chat. I really wanted to have at least gay friend so that I can understand more about my gay sexuality as well someone that I can share to have gay chat or problem. I tried okcupid, realjock, manhunt nothing has given me a good result. I tried going out to gay night club but no one seems to be interested to talk with me. In every conversation I always listen what the other person talks. I am not the best chatter but I have tried my best to follow the direction of the conversation. Has anyone experience this before?
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    Apr 09, 2014 4:34 AM GMT
    People are just shallow. I have exactly the same problem as you so just try not to let it kill your confidence.
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    Apr 09, 2014 2:26 PM GMT
    Learn to be the best chatter. Problem solved....
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    Apr 09, 2014 2:47 PM GMT
    mark515 said ... I tried okcupid, realjock, manhunt nothing has given me a good result ..

    Sorry its your choice but you have nothing in your realjock profile. Read up on a few profiles here as a guide and find some typical junk that is truthful about yourself.

    -if your patient; want something in life, chances are you get it. Give it some time.
    -another great friend option is a hag GF.
    -if your feeling shy; scope out some gay accepting bars in the early afternoon off hours. Talk to the bar staff the best time to meet a guy. Arrive in about that time, say hello again to the staff, buy a couple of slow drinks and leave if you want.

    -there are meetings at the LGBT centers that work on men's issues. its a starting point.
    -a loud bar is not a good place to start up a conversation, chances both of you are unable to hear 1of5 words spoken.
    -volunteer
    -if your at a gay event dress the part even just a little.
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4433

    Apr 09, 2014 3:12 PM GMT
    You joined RJ in 2011 but haven't bothered to fill out your profile? Why should anyone want to be friends with you if you're too lazy to offer up a reason other than you want something from them? You have to make an effort.
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    Apr 09, 2014 4:18 PM GMT
    The interweb is great for people like you that don't really like to chat, but like to "chat". Don't start swimming in the deep end of a pool, try something a little easier. And like a member on here said FILL OUT YOUR PROFILE. Say something about who you are and don't let us guess.
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    Apr 09, 2014 4:41 PM GMT
    mark515 saidHi everyone,
    I have spent many years trying to get someone that I like to like me. Everytime we initiate a conversation it turned out that the other party did not reply me back after one chat. I really wanted to have at least gay friend so that I can understand more about my gay sexuality as well someone that I can share to have gay chat or problem. I tried okcupid, realjock, manhunt nothing has given me a good result. I tried going out to gay night club but no one seems to be interested to talk with me. In every conversation I always listen what the other person talks. I am not the best chatter but I have tried my best to follow the direction of the conversation. Has anyone experience this before?


    Not since I was 25-ish.

    You want friends? Get out into real life. Gay sports clubs, gay political groups - just about any organization with lots of people (some of whom will be gay). I think the Chiltern Mountain Club has Boston members. Sing? Join a gay choral group. Ski? Join a gay ski club.

    Short term - try a vacation romance - (not permanent). Go to a gay vacation spot, where it will be easy to meet gay men/boys at their most relaxed. (You're not too far from P-town). Go to an old fashioned gay bar and lubricate your reticence with some drink.