'I Came Out, Now How do I Get in? The Dilemma of Being a Queer Crip' Article I had written for Huffington Post on ways to include Queers with Disabilities in LGBTQ Community

  • confidentcrip

    Posts: 111

    Apr 14, 2014 2:30 AM GMT

    Let me know what you think, and please spread the word.

    Thanks.

    http://huff.to/1gJgCkt
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    Apr 14, 2014 2:48 AM GMT
    Yeaaa this is worth considering... Is difficult to address its like a minority within a minority group. I am not adequately informed to address this, I was not adequately prepared to understand this concern when I first heard of it.

    I say keep working out... Theres bound to be a guy that'd love to pick you up :-) Sorry I know little more.

    Lion king tattoo lol :-) :-) :-) :-)
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    Apr 14, 2014 2:53 AM GMT
    Or maybe not minority groups but, gender I suppose its a two gender subsets rather than minority / majority conflagration
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    Apr 14, 2014 1:33 PM GMT
    Seriously, it's always drag queens who are the meanest. I hate them. They're insecure bitches who live throughout their life by putting down other people and hiding behind a mask.
    I don't think I've ever met a drag queen who wasn't condescending.
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    Apr 14, 2014 2:36 PM GMT
    It's hard. I don't have a disability (at least visible) and I find all this hard. The gay community is difficult for everybody. Straight people are just, at the end of the day, encouraged to be together by societal pressures while we are pressured to be apart. I don't know, hard to give advice, it's life.
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    Apr 14, 2014 2:45 PM GMT
    Sweetooth saidIt's hard. I don't have a disability (at least visible) and I find all this hard. The gay community is difficult for everybody. Straight people are just, at the end of the day, encouraged to be together by societal pressures while we are pressured to be apart. I don't know, hard to give advice, it's life.


    Just go to l'oasis.
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    Apr 14, 2014 3:22 PM GMT
    I do understand that having a handicap makes it more difficult to find people for relationships or even for sexual encounters.

    However, it doesn't seem to be an issue unique to the gay community. There are many articles which indicate that this is a problem for both heterosexuals and gays.

    Unfortunately there are many gays and heterosexuals that are very superficial. This is not something you can change, nor should you really want to deal with people like that.

    You will never be able to get everyone to be open to the idea of having sex or being in a relationship with a PwD. However, you can stand up against blatant displays of discrimination such as the drag queen in the bar you discuss in the article.

    I'm not really sure what the answer is but it would seem that limiting your focus to the gay community also limits the number of people you reach. You would gain more support and greater access to solutions if you recognized the full number of people affected by these issues.
  • confidentcrip

    Posts: 111

    Apr 14, 2014 3:28 PM GMT
    I agree that this is an issue for all Persons with Disabilities, of course. I talk about the Queer Community in particular because that is my experience. Also, because our queer culture has built up a particular aesthetic, that those with disabilities cannot meet. Lastly, the discussions had around being doubly marginalized (ie. queer and crippled) need to be had more openly, and that is what I am attempting to do.
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    Apr 14, 2014 5:26 PM GMT
    Davidolce saidSeriously, it's always drag queens who are the meanest. I hate them. They're insecure bitches who live throughout their life by putting down other people and hiding behind a mask.
    I don't think I've ever met a drag queen who wasn't condescending.


    Yeh, I really hate drag queens, I feel very uncomfortable around them.
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    Apr 14, 2014 6:31 PM GMT
    divvy198509 said
    Davidolce saidSeriously, it's always drag queens who are the meanest. I hate them. They're insecure bitches who live throughout their life by putting down other people and hiding behind a mask.
    I don't think I've ever met a drag queen who wasn't condescending.


    Yeh, I really hate drag queens, I feel very uncomfortable around them.


    They're sooooo arrogant too! Ugh.
  • confidentcrip

    Posts: 111

    Apr 14, 2014 6:49 PM GMT

    Guys, please stop with the hate against drag queens. The incident that I described was a one off. For sure, there are individuals who engage in this behaviour of course. To generalize to all drag queens is unfair, inflammatory and borderline discriminatory. I would ask that you focus on the content of the issue please.

    Thank you.
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    Apr 14, 2014 7:48 PM GMT
    confidentcrip said
    Guys, please stop with the hate against drag queens. The incident that I described was a one off. For sure, there are individuals who engage in this behaviour of course. To generalize to all drag queens is unfair, inflammatory and borderline discriminatory. I would ask that you focus on the content of the issue please.

    Thank you.


    I was about to say the same thing. Just when you think you can make a blanket statement, someone usually proves it wrong. I've known plenty of Drag Queens over the years. While never a fan of DQs I met this one guy who didn't lip sync, didn't hate women, didn't degrade anyone, he worked and didn't do drugs. (That was my stereotype, sorry!). He was a normal guy who liked to perform! In or out of drag. it's just a different venue for him.

    Back to QwD (Queers with Disabilities), or straight... am I the only one who noticed a lot of guys with chairs have great arms?? Just sayin!

    article-2020171-0CDEE9A900000578-446_634

    inter-John-Quinn3.jpg
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    Apr 14, 2014 8:02 PM GMT
    OSCAR PISTORIUS!!!!! Legs or not, I couldn't care less
  • confidentcrip

    Posts: 111

    Apr 14, 2014 8:03 PM GMT
    unckabasa said
    confidentcrip said
    Guys, please stop with the hate against drag queens. The incident that I described was a one off. For sure, there are individuals who engage in this behaviour of course. To generalize to all drag queens is unfair, inflammatory and borderline discriminatory. I would ask that you focus on the content of the issue please.

    Thank you.


    I was about to say the same thing. Just when you think you can make a blanket statement, someone usually proves it wrong. I've known plenty of Drag Queens over the years. While never a fan of DQs I met this one guy who didn't lip sync, didn't hate women, didn't degrade anyone, he worked and didn't do drugs. (That was my stereotype, sorry!). He was a normal guy who liked to perform! In or out of drag. it's just a different venue for him.

    Back to QwD (Queers with Disabilities), or straight... am I the only one who noticed a lot of guys with chairs have great arms?? Just sayin!

    article-2020171-0CDEE9A900000578-446_634

    inter-John-Quinn3.jpg


    I do have great arms indeed. But even that aesthetic can be stereotypical of what we in the community call the super crip; the one who tries to constantly overcome their disability. But I do love me nice arms. hawt!
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    Apr 16, 2014 12:04 AM GMT
    confidentcrip said
    unckabasa said
    confidentcrip said
    Guys, please stop with the hate against drag queens. The incident that I described was a one off. For sure, there are individuals who engage in this behaviour of course. To generalize to all drag queens is unfair, inflammatory and borderline discriminatory. I would ask that you focus on the content of the issue please.

    Thank you.


    I was about to say the same thing. Just when you think you can make a blanket statement, someone usually proves it wrong. I've known plenty of Drag Queens over the years. While never a fan of DQs I met this one guy who didn't lip sync, didn't hate women, didn't degrade anyone, he worked and didn't do drugs. (That was my stereotype, sorry!). He was a normal guy who liked to perform! In or out of drag. it's just a different venue for him.

    Back to QwD (Queers with Disabilities), or straight... am I the only one who noticed a lot of guys with chairs have great arms?? Just sayin!

    article-2020171-0CDEE9A900000578-446_634

    inter-John-Quinn3.jpg


    I do have great arms indeed. But even that aesthetic can be stereotypical of what we in the community call the super crip; the one who tries to constantly overcome their disability. But I do love me nice arms. hawt!


    There are worse stereotypes!
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    Apr 16, 2014 12:06 AM GMT
    Davidolce saidOSCAR PISTORIUS!!!!! Legs or not, I couldn't care less



    yeah, great the O J Simpson of crips......
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    Apr 16, 2014 12:19 AM GMT
    unckabasa said
    Davidolce saidOSCAR PISTORIUS!!!!! Legs or not, I couldn't care less



    yeah, great the O J Simpson of crips......



    He's innocent till proven guilty.
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    Apr 16, 2014 2:45 AM GMT
    Davidolce said
    Sweetooth saidIt's hard. I don't have a disability (at least visible) and I find all this hard. The gay community is difficult for everybody. Straight people are just, at the end of the day, encouraged to be together by societal pressures while we are pressured to be apart. I don't know, hard to give advice, it's life.


    Just go to l'oasis.


    I am taking about a genuine, tangible relationship. I can get laid easily, thanks.