Guys into Dominant and submissive roles if you have done this even just once which were you and how did you choose it

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 17, 2014 7:34 PM GMT
    Not being into Dom and submissive roles myself wondering what motivates you to role play and is there pleasure in it or did you just play along to please the other guy
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    Apr 22, 2014 2:34 PM GMT
    Sydneyrugbyjock73 said Not being into Dom and submissive roles myself wondering what motivates you to role play and is there pleasure in it or did you just play along to please the other guy

    I'm not sure if I understand it fully, but I used to get boners when doing ground work in judo as a kid - some of my earliest sexual memories. It caused a lot of problems, confusion and stress at the time, with other guys at the club calling gay, but with some help from a different club and as I got older I was able to control things a lot more, and accepted it as being just a quirk. Was quite motivating to push me to up my game & my training icon_razz.gif.

    Locks, pressure points, chokes and any of the other compliance work all has a similar effect on getting a lob on. Strikes give a much smaller reaction, mainly because they are over so quickly, and as you get older you realise the serious injuries and devastating effect they can have. Partners who fight back are far more fun than lads who just take it IMO, but I know doms who are far more into boys who have had the spunk knocked out of them already.

    On the dominance side of things, I am a believe in taking personal charge if you want to see change in anything in life, otherwise you end up waiting around for others to step up and it often doesn't happen. Its just a character thing, and I guess it rubs off into the bedroom a bit, but mainly in the type of guys that are attracted to me. Lots of lads have said they like my confidence and that I take control., which in turn affects what happens in the bedroom.

    I don't go doing compliance work or hurting anyone I go to bed with - if someone isn't into that, I can be as gentle as a lamb. If a guy is into it, then I can usually make them squirm. I always agree limits on that type of thing first and regardless of what they want, I don't do things that I feel are going to cause serious injury.

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    Apr 23, 2014 10:27 AM GMT
    I can't be the only one on here icon_lol.gif.
  • takashi

    Posts: 192

    Apr 23, 2014 10:38 AM GMT
    When I was young and living in Japan, I had a lover who was into that dominance thing. I am very submissive in bed and he would tie me up, hands behind my back and knees tied together, not being able to close my legs, which exposed my anus to penetration. Sense of helplessness was intoxicating.
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    Jul 10, 2014 5:48 PM GMT
    I suppose I would have fallen into the submissive role but it wasn't a kinky thing. It was more the case it was my first time so I didn't feel confident enough in what we were doing to take the lead so I just went with the flow and allowed him to take charge.
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    Jul 10, 2014 8:21 PM GMT
    Interesting views and open and honest as well. I'd like to hear more from those who have done or regularly are submissive. I know that if someone tried to dominate me i would react aggressively so it makes me wonder why some gay men be submissive by choice. Also because as I am a man who fits into the dominant guy stereotype I get requests to be extra dominant which is fine coz it's what I do anyway, but guys ask for a version of dominance which is more extreme so I want to get my head around why would a grown man want to peruse my to terra them harshly. People never learn if they don't ask questions
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4435

    Jul 10, 2014 9:53 PM GMT
    I had a submissive relationship with a guy for a while. No restraints or breathing controls used (phobias) or even verbal abuse but he definitely used me like a toy and directed everything we did. I even allowed some cbt and desired it but it was all just a passing phase. I think the reason I was enjoying it was I was head of a large corporation and had very high leadership responsibilities as well as crushing financial responsibilities at home. Allowing myself to yield power to another guy even to the point of pain and to withstand it without restraint was a turn-on to me.