Sydneyrugbyjock73 said Gay men are far more likely to have a mental health issue or self medicate with illicit substances and while many RJ members have physically healthy lifestyles we all know people who are struggling more than they should due to feeling ostracised and segregated by our own leaving guys with no where to go and having to go along with the culture
The wonder of the Internet is that we can be chatting like this across whole continents. The challenge in comparing notes is that gay cultural experiences vary in all these places. You're in Australia, me in the US, others in Canada, the UK, Continental Europe, the Middle East, Africa, etc. And there are differences within those regions, as well.
I guess my own experience has been very fortunate. When I lived in places that weren't particularly gay friendly, the gay community became my friend. We all reached out to each other, like survivors in a life raft surrounded by rough seas. It may be in our nature to bitch among ourselves, but to an often hostile outside world we more typically present a united front, at least to my experience.
In fact, it was the unaccustomed gay community support I received, compared to the mostly indifferent straight community, that made me especially grateful to be gay. Not just the parties and sex, but that I had real friends, like I never had before.
The closest thing previously was the camaraderie from my Army days, and the spirit of helpfulness, the idea of leaving no one behind, nor even letting anyone fall behind. You all finished together.
Are there cliques & segregation? Sure, we even had that in the Army, that's universal human nature. Though when the pressure was on we all became a team, and I've seen that with gays, too.
One of the questions the US Veterans Administration (VA) routinely asks us severely disabled veterans is whether we have a personal support structure in our lives. "Yes", I smile, "Very much so." I truly do, and it's my gay community.