Dating younger guys....good or bad?

  • WxStud

    Posts: 9

    Apr 17, 2014 9:51 PM GMT
    So met a guy I really liked the last time I was in Columbus ( I live in a small town a few hours north). The problem...I'm 46 and he is 25. I don't really date a lot and was surprised when he actively pursued me. We hit it off and made plans for a dinner date the next time I came to town. We texted quite a bit and I gave let gave him opportunity to bail if he changed his mind. The reason...I'm not sure if I would've dated a 46 year old when I was 25. But he really seemed interested and kept telling me he couldn't wait for our date. After 2 weeks of communicating, he texted me today ( our date was tomorrow)and told me he was going to Chicago instead....and then said he was leaving Columbus in 2 weeks for the summer (he's in law school) so he would catch up w/ me again in the fall. Needless to say I was a little hurt but didn't let on, just kept it short & wished him well. So was it me or just a reflection of his maturity level. Actually guys, I'm looking for a little boost after this, so let me know what you think.

    -Tony
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 17, 2014 9:56 PM GMT
    25 is ok. He's a consenting adult. Just don't lay your eyes on highschoolers. K? K
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Apr 17, 2014 9:57 PM GMT
    Well I'd enjoy the conversation with the guy because he's a law student and having been in law school and have my J.D., I'd find it a great discussion.

    That said, do you want a conversation or are you thinking about it being more? My suggestion is that you keep your thoughts grounded and approach it for what it may be.. just some good conversation. Beyond that is just speculation at this point. I'd certainly do it and if he wants to reschedule when he's back in town, do so. Enjoy the time, I have friends of all ages and I have have lunch or dinner all the time.

    Now if moves to being more, thats a whole different ball game and you need to consider that carefully.
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    Apr 17, 2014 10:01 PM GMT
    He obviously had second thoughts, though you'll probably never know the reason. "Catch up" six months from now? Don't hold your breath.
    Find someone else. You're a good-looking guy.
  • SinfulWays

    Posts: 542

    Apr 17, 2014 10:01 PM GMT
    DEFINITELY GOOD!
  • Import

    Posts: 7190

    Apr 17, 2014 10:24 PM GMT
    He cancelled the day before the actual date?
    after 2 weeks of telling u how excited he was?

    He was prob just texting u because he was bored and wanted a txting buddy? Maybe he liked knowing someone else is into him and was doing it out of sheer boredom and wanting to feel desired?

    I wouldn't count on catching up in the Fall....I mean it's April lol. like 6 months will go by and he'll magically wanna see you again? delete his number. Just because someone is in law school doesn't make that person a good person or motivayed or high-quality individual. In fact, I find that most ppl that go to law school and actually finish dont even bother taking the BAR and becoming an actual lawyer. Rather they get a JD and work as a data analyst for an insurance company or something or some other desk jockey job..... not that there's anything wrong with that, but going to law school in and of itself is not that big of a deal.

    My one cousin was such a dumb bitch. She went to law school after undergrad because she basically didnt wanna start working....took about $100k in student loans out and everyone was all "omg, Ava is such a go-getter, she's so motivated and bright" well when her dumbass graduated she sat for the BAR 3 times and couldn't pass it....So, instead she got married to some dude in seattle and now doesn't have to work.... BUT she's educated so at cocktail hour she can appear legitimate to society and of course to her super cool friends discussing environmental law. whatta go getter!
  • WxStud

    Posts: 9

    Apr 17, 2014 10:25 PM GMT
    Yes, I realized I was blown off. Just doing a little public wound-licking to make myself feel better. And Nooooooooo...I would NEVER EVER consider dating under legal age. Actually 25 was actually about 10 years below the guys I would consider dating, and even THAT age made me feel a little skeevy! icon_smile.gif. P.S., anyone available in Columbus this weekend?! ;)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 17, 2014 11:58 PM GMT
    Import saidHe cancelled the day before the actual date?
    after 2 weeks of telling u how excited he was?

    He was prob just texting u because he was bored and wanted a txting buddy? Maybe he liked knowing someone else is into him and was doing it out of sheer boredom and wanting to feel desired?

    I wouldn't count on catching up in the Fall....I mean it's April lol. like 6 months will go by and he'll magically wanna see you again? delete his number. Just because someone is in law school doesn't make that person a good person or motivayed or high-quality individual. In fact, I find that most ppl that go to law school and actually finish dont even bother taking the BAR and becoming an actual lawyer. Rather they get a JD and work as a data analyst for an insurance company or something or some other desk jockey job..... not that there's anything wrong with that, but going to law school in and of itself is not that big of a deal.

    My one cousin was such a dumb bitch. She went to law school after undergrad because she basically didnt wanna start working....took about $100k in student loans out and everyone was all "omg, Ava is such a go-getter, she's so motivated and bright" well when her dumbass graduated she sat for the BAR 3 times and couldn't pass it....So, instead she got married to some dude in seattle and now doesn't have to work.... BUT she's educated so at cocktail hour she can appear legitimate to society and of course to her super cool friends discussing environmental law. whatta go getter!


    #Truestory
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    Apr 18, 2014 11:53 AM GMT
    In general, I think that is too much of an age difference for you. I think that both of you are in completely different places in life.

    Looking back on your own life, don't you feel your maturity level and mindset was different at 25 than today?
  • Sunny_x9

    Posts: 95

    Apr 18, 2014 1:08 PM GMT
    Well
    I dated a 18 year ( just turned ) when we met . we talked with each other
    on phone and met 4-5 times for a month . then I asked him for
    a date he said yes ( he was shy ) . but it did happennd . it was all
    well . anyway for me I mostly like young guys .
    they mostly dont know how and where to start or how to ...
    so I think we can make them feel comfortable and
    also make them understand what where how . and so on
  • mybud

    Posts: 11837

    Apr 18, 2014 1:49 PM GMT
    Younger guys usually crave stability and he saw that in you...46 lives in a much different world than 25.46 is flattered a younger guy finding him attractive...25 wants dependability other 25's can't give him. You gotta to suck it up and move on...Good Luck.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 18, 2014 2:17 PM GMT
    WxStud saidYes, I realized I was blown off. Just doing a little public wound-licking to make myself feel better. And Nooooooooo...I would NEVER EVER consider dating under legal age. Actually 25 was actually about 10 years below the guys I would consider dating, and even THAT age made me feel a little skeevy! icon_smile.gif. P.S., anyone available in Columbus this weekend?! ;)



    He was just hella horny and crushing on you for a bit. Move on knowing you are desirable to other age groups other than your own..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 18, 2014 3:02 PM GMT
    I don't think its either good or bad, there are both sides to dating a younger guy. They are way more casual about stuff like this and that is just because of the maturity level. But then I have met guys in late 30s doing the same thing.

    I will say take things casually with younger men until they actually reach to a point where you know its headed somewhere for sure. Its always nice to be object of someone's desire but unless they make good on their promise don't make too much of it.
  • lgg5819

    Posts: 141

    Apr 18, 2014 3:10 PM GMT
    Import saidIn fact, I find that most ppl that go to law school and actually finish dont even bother taking the BAR and becoming an actual lawyer. Rather they get a JD and work as a data analyst for an insurance company or something or some other desk jockey job.....


    That's ridiculous and not true. Somebody sounds bitter.
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    Apr 18, 2014 3:52 PM GMT
    PGHguy082 saidI think that both of you are in completely different places in life.
    Oh, again this bullshit rhetoric.
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4435

    Apr 18, 2014 4:01 PM GMT
    You don't know his motivation. Sounds like a motivated guy to be back in school at 45. If you don't want to explore with a 45 year old guy, just say so but don't try to make him out a bad guy. If you're just feeling jilted, get over it and understand something may have just came up. Talk to him in the Fall if he calls and see what happens next.
  • wellwell

    Posts: 2265

    Apr 18, 2014 4:01 PM GMT
    Young guys usually aren't senile, nor jaded like my peers tend to be. Many prefer an "older" man; reasonably concluding, that an older one would be less likely to cheat on them or infect them w/ one of the exotic new diseases.
    Unfortunately, as in your case and like many many gays, this kid changed his mind or accepted a more attractive offer; it happens a lot amongst the youngsters.

    Additionally, there seems to be more-and-more younger guys who's parents have concluded that the barbarian practice of cutting dix should end, and have spared their boys such mutilation.

    I LOVE THAT !!
  • Breeman

    Posts: 339

    Apr 18, 2014 4:33 PM GMT
    Ahh! the age gap issue again. Always an interesting topic.

    Just enjoy those relationships and learn something while they last. Don't get too attached. Be nice, be fair, and let them go.

  • kentstrongtom...

    Posts: 1294

    Apr 18, 2014 8:15 PM GMT
    Probably his boyfriend retuned home from a business trip, idk. Clearly he was bored, alone and you were available for makeing him feel good, wanted, special. Those things happen on a daily basis.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 18, 2014 8:17 PM GMT
    He wants a future lawyer husband and you're not him. Lol jk, well buddy it's not like you know him that well. Don't get too attached in the beginning. I dated a couple of guys from 19-25 before, definitely a no no, just my take on it.
  • WxStud

    Posts: 9

    Apr 18, 2014 9:00 PM GMT
    socalx10 saidHe wants a future lawyer husband and you're not him. Lol jk, well buddy it's not like you know him that well. Don't get too attached in the beginning. I dated a couple of guys from 19-25 before, definitely a no no, just my take on it.



    Believe me, I was not attached! I know I can't expect my mind-set and experience in a 25-year-old....I just hate wasting my time. Should've just screwed him that first night and forgot about it, but I've never been that type. I guess I have to remember that some people ARE that type. As for catching up in 6 months.....not going to happen! His loss..... icon_smile.gif
  • conservativej...

    Posts: 2465

    Apr 18, 2014 10:06 PM GMT
    Dating younger guys ....


    It's real work my friend. :-)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 18, 2014 10:09 PM GMT
    Date whoever the Fuck You want.

    Be prepared.

    Deal with it.

    Repeat as necessary.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 18, 2014 10:26 PM GMT
    If you are just looking for a little ego boost, I'll say you look damn good!

    It could be, since he knew he was going away for 6 months, he didn't want to start something just before he left. Nothing worse that finding someone you truly like only having to turn around and say goodbye. That would be a very mature approach.

    That way you both could start dating without the time factor influencing things. Sometimes we say things when under a time crunch, like the "L" word too soon. I say give him the time away, and see what the feelings are in the fall. See what he says during the summer if you keep in touch.
  • buddycat

    Posts: 1874

    Apr 19, 2014 8:23 AM GMT
    25 is a bit young for you and I. I don't really care about age really as long as they are older than their early twenties which is simply too young. I agree though he was going away and although he may enjoy your company maybe he didn't want to get too involved.