Can your sexuality change over time?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2014 2:16 AM GMT
    Growing up, I've always found myself attracted to men and very rarely attracted to girls. I mean, I was always able to recognize a "hot" girl but I was rarely turned on by the thought of sex with a female.

    However, more recently I've been starting to feel like I'm more attracted to women. I don't want to say more than men, but I'd say it's about 50/50 right now.

    As a teenager, I'd watch mostly straight porn and find myself turned on by it, but I was mostly focusing on the guy. I'd say in my late teens and up until a few months ago I found myself mostly watching gay porn and being turned on by it and enjoying it. Now I find myself mainly watching straight porn and being turned on by both the guy and the girl, maybe even more so the woman as of recent.

    Is my sexuality "changing", or is this just some kind of phase of curiosity? I've had this crush on a straight friend of mine for a while now, and I definitely still feel attracted to him when I'm around him...

    This is so confusing. Wtf am I? icon_sad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2014 2:17 AM GMT
    Yes it can, mine changed over time.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2014 2:19 AM GMT
    Nope. You just discover who you really are.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2014 2:26 AM GMT
    chances are you're really bi.

    everyone is different.
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    May 01, 2014 2:29 AM GMT
    ant811 saidGrowing up, I've always found myself attracted to men and very rarely attracted to girls. I mean, I was always able to recognize a "hot" girl but I was rarely turned on by the thought of sex with a female.

    However, more recently I've been starting to feel like I'm more attracted to women. I don't want to say more than men, but I'd say it's about 50/50 right now.

    As a teenager, I'd watch mostly straight porn and find myself turned on by it, but I was mostly focusing on the guy. I'd say in my late teens and up until a few months ago I found myself mostly watching gay porn and being turned on by it and enjoying it. Now I find myself mainly watching straight porn and being turned on by both the guy and the girl, maybe even more so the woman as of recent.

    Is my sexuality "changing", or is this just some kind of phase of curiosity? I've had this crush on a straight friend of mine for a while now, and I definitely still feel attracted to him when I'm around him...

    This is so confusing. Wtf am I? icon_sad.gif


    http://www.pitara.com/discover/earth/online.asp?story=66
    66_1.gif66_2.gif

    Awareness and its identity might fade in and out but I'd have to see the science to convince me that orientation does.

    If fantasizing eating pussy makes you orgasm, that's different than simply watching guys fuck chicks.

    Recognizing what girl is hot is not sexual attraction. And certainly the attraction to your str8 male friend does not make you str8. Fortunately you can't catch it by osmosis.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2014 2:32 AM GMT
    ant811 said...
    Is my sexuality "changing", or is this just some kind of phase of curiosity?
    ...
    This is so confusing. Wtf am I? icon_sad.gif

    Sorry that this is bothering you. Don't waste your time labeling yourself, but go out and explore (safely).
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2014 2:40 AM GMT
    It's very natural for your feelings towards BOTH men and women to ebb and flow.
    It's the beautiful thing about sexuality,, it's YOURS and not something that has to mimic anyone elses experience. I still have dreams where women are present.
    It may sound foreign to most guys on RJ, but it's what flows naturally in and out of my head.
    You can't control your attractions. They're something to be celebrated. It's part of what makes you unique.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2014 2:56 AM GMT
    Have sex with everything that gets you hard(squirrels included). You can figure out your sexuality later.
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    May 01, 2014 2:57 AM GMT
    charlitos saidHave sucks with everything that gets you hard(squirrels included). You can figure out your sexuality later.


    Even dead people? icon_surprised.gif
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    May 01, 2014 2:57 AM GMT
    xavier92 said
    charlitos saidHave sucks with everything that gets you hard(squirrels included). You can figure out your sexuality later.


    Even dead people? icon_surprised.gif


    consensual sex...(does not apply to squirrels)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2014 3:18 AM GMT
    I guess I would say that perhaps in -some- people, over time their sexuality could develop or expand.

    Or perhaps the potential was always latent but there, and boredom or other factors awaken a keener interest, shifting the balance you're used to having?

    Does that mean it's changed? Probably not, it just means you've discovered more facets of yourself previously hidden from view.
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    May 01, 2014 3:37 AM GMT
    TwisttheLeaf saidI guess I would say that perhaps in -some- people, over time their sexuality could develop or expand.

    Or perhaps the potential was always latent but there, and boredom or other factors awaken a keener interest, shifting the balance you're used to having?

    Does that mean it's changed? Probably not, it just means you've discovered more facets of yourself previously hidden from view.

    ^ nailed it
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    May 01, 2014 3:46 AM GMT
    TwisttheLeaf saidI guess I would say that perhaps in -some- people, over time their sexuality could develop or expand.

    Or perhaps the potential was always latent but there, and boredom or other factors awaken a keener interest, shifting the balance you're used to having?

    Does that mean it's changed? Probably not, it just means you've discovered more facets of yourself previously hidden from view.


    That's basically what xavier said icon_rolleyes.gif
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    May 01, 2014 5:03 AM GMT
    woodsmen saidI say that sexuality is rigid.

    Only for Rigid people.
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    May 01, 2014 5:04 AM GMT
    xxxmonkey said
    TwisttheLeaf saidI guess I would say that perhaps in -some- people, over time their sexuality could develop or expand.

    Or perhaps the potential was always latent but there, and boredom or other factors awaken a keener interest, shifting the balance you're used to having?

    Does that mean it's changed? Probably not, it just means you've discovered more facets of yourself previously hidden from view.


    That's basically what xavier said icon_rolleyes.gif

    No. He said you "discover who you really are", as if what you were before wasn't really you. That's not how it works (at least for me) You transform yourself, very different.
  • Karl

    Posts: 5787

    May 01, 2014 10:11 AM GMT
    What needs to be said has been said by guys above me, the only thing I wanna say is :

    - Who cares, you are just you and you're attracted to anyone you want to.
    Don't waste time labeling yourself, just enjoy life icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2014 8:41 PM GMT
    Change is certainly possible for bisexuals, but not for straights or people born Bona Fide Homosexuals. I knew I was attracted to men from a young and, and that never has, and never will change.

    But the ever changing bisexuals is why a number of religious people feel homosexuals can be cured and changed.

    yes you will have people tell you it just took you that long to find yourself, but not being born Bi. I and and other Bona Fide Homosexuals have never suffered that confusion; or straights either.

    But in the complex world we live in, groups have earned labels, and they are not about to go away. Just as we are not all white.
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    May 01, 2014 8:43 PM GMT
    Decadence_of_Art saidChange is certainly possible for bisexuals, but not for straights or people born Bona Fide Homosexuals. I knew I was attracted to men from a young and, and that never has, and never will change.

    But the ever changing bisexuals is why a number of religious people feel homosexuals can be cured and changed.

    yes you will have people tell you it just took you that long to find yourself, but not being born Bi. I and and other Bona Fide Homosexuals have never suffered that confusion; or straights either.

    But in the complex world we live in, groups have earned labels, and they are not about to go away. Just as we are not all white.


    +1
  • Lincsbear

    Posts: 2605

    May 01, 2014 9:23 PM GMT
    Definitely.

    All aspects of our personalities can change.
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    May 03, 2014 10:41 AM GMT
    Lincsbear saidDefinitely.

    All aspects of our personalities can change.


    I have seen many aspects of my personality change over the years. But one thing that will never change, is my sexuality. I was born a Bona Fide Homosexual, and will die one, as I was not born bi.icon_wink.gif
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    May 03, 2014 11:54 AM GMT
    owl_bundy saidthey say sexuality is fluid but.................

    Good sex does create a lot of fluids.
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    Apr 19, 2015 1:43 AM GMT
    Yes of course, you're constantly changing......So....why can't certain aspects of yourself?. Men are mistaken in the intention to solidify the fluid and moldable. Nothing is concrete, especially not sexuality, it's honestly preference at set time. Just go with it, Fitting yourself into a box and into labels just increases risk of damage, internally or otherwise.
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    Apr 19, 2015 5:47 PM GMT


    "Can your sexuality change over time?"

    According to the Bible thumpers, absolutely, which is why there are ex-gay ministries and reparation therapy organizations.
    Because they think it can change, they believe gay people are big fat willfully sinning sinners that are going to burn in a lake of fire forever for not changing.

  • Svnw688

    Posts: 3350

    Apr 20, 2015 7:42 PM GMT
    Doubtful, but I believe you can come to better accept what was always there in terms of sexuality.

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    Jun 25, 2015 6:53 AM GMT
    I think it can change - there's a well known 'phenomenon' amongst transguys - pre-transition we're lesbians with zero interest in men, post-transition we turn gay. Of course there's a little thing called transition in the middle of that change in sexual orientation, so I accept that the above may not apply to the non-trans person!

    Anyway, as others have said, the best thing is not too get too hung up on labels, on 'what' you are or 'what' is happening.. but to just be. Explore if you want, enjoy the journey. There's no right or wrong.